I have no close friends

Mike_7597 · ‎01-10-2018

I am 21yrs old and i recently seperated from my girlfriend of 4.5 years 2 months ago. During that time I put all my effort into making the relationship work and didn't prioritise my friendships (I know this was wrong). Since my break-up I have been trying to reconnect with my small group of friends but they are not too interested in catching up and never talk to me unless I message them first. I feel very lonely a lot of the time and I feel like there is no one I can turn too for support. I have been struggling to come to terms with my break-up and it has been made that much harder when my friends don't EVER message me to talk or hang out. I am currently studying at university but despite my best efforts to be friendly I have not made any friends there either. It's frustrating because I'd love to go out and have a good time but I have no one to do anything with. I also suffer with social anxiety to a degree which is why it's been hard for me to reach out. I'm starting to lose hope and I just really need some new friends and people to talk to.

Wanderlust123 · ‎01-10-2018

Hi Mike,

I understand how you feel. I'm 22 and feel like I have a lack of close friends as well. Being a quiet natured person, it can be difficult to make friends or turn acquaintances into friends. I have graduated uni now but found it really difficult to make friends at uni even though I thought it was going to be a social atmosphere (instead everyone just sits on their phones haha)!

Do you have any hobbies or play sports? I've joined a social basketball team to get out and meet people. Also, MeetUp is another alternative to join a social group.

I understand this can feel upsetting but you're not alone. I'm always here, as well as this great community.

Hope you have a great week 😊

Mike_7597 · ‎02-10-2018

Hi Wanderlust

thankyou so much for your reply. I just don’t know what to do anymore and no one to talk to about it. I absolutely love sports and have signed up for both the volleyball and touch football teams at uni but that doesn’t start until next week.

I have tried using meetup before but there doesn’t seem to be many younger people on there so I’ve been hesitant to actually go out. I feel like I won’t fit in and don’t want to look silly.

Wanderlust123 · ‎02-10-2018

Hi Mike,

How was your day? What did you get up to?

That's great you have joined some sporting teams through uni! 🙂 If you are eager to do play a game this week, have a look on FB if there is a group for 'fill in players'. I'm part of 'Volleyball SA | Beach & Indoor - Players Seeking a Team!' (not sure if you're from SA but I'm sure other states have these groups too) and a basketball fill in FB group.

I understand your fear of MeetUp too, I feel the same sometimes too. Although this weekend I am going to put myself out there and go to a dinner and a social badminton meetup (wish me luck)!

I hope today was a better day for you 🙂

Mike_7597 · ‎11-10-2018

Hi Wanderlust

Sorry for not replying sooner, I've just been buried in uni assessment the past week. I just started playing Volleyball and touch football this week and that was really fun. I also live in QLD, I havent really looked on FB too much though.

I hope your dinner and badminton meetup went well!!

Guest_8189 · ‎13-10-2018

I'm in the exact same boat. Haven't had close friends since leaving high school. I am now 22. I guess at our age we become distance from people due to work and going our own way. I've considered meetup.com but bailed alot of the time because the people just weren't my age. Tbh I think you'll find decent people at youth group meetups worth a try.

Mike_7597 · ‎14-10-2018

Yeah that's exactly it, in my small group of friends they all work full-time and have their own things going on in their lives. I haven't heard of any youth group meetups in Brisbane, i'd definitely give it a go if I could. I've been thinking lately it might be a good idea to move into student accommodation at uni, hopefully that leads to something.

Guest_8189 · ‎15-10-2018

That could be good. What do you hope to study?

Youth group is usually associated with christian religious groups, not sure your into that. But the people are decent. Just know you aren't alone, people who have friends are not always happy too. I try to eat a healthy diet, exercise. Keep working on yourself and the rest will come naturally. May it be friends or a relationship. Don't dwell too much on your breakup, it only means you'll find someone better. Keep going.