Birthday wish

[sometimesiwanttodisappear]

On Saturday is my 18th birthday and I think it will be the most lonely. I just don't want to be there on the day. My grandmothers funeral was on my last birthday all I remember is crying my heart out. So this birthday, I suppose is going to be a remembrance day for my dead grandmother. Not only that I even saw my grandmother getting resuscitated when she past in the nursing home. I am so lost with out her, not only that I am totally friendless and I that my mother and father neglect me all the time. They are always fighting, they always swear at me an they priorities the television over my voice and how I feel. I am so lost all I have is myself. I feel as this website has given me a small bit of relief. Sometime I just want to disappear.

[geoff]

Hello, thanks for posting your comment and I'm sorry that no one has replied to it, but Saturday is a big day, you turn 18, that means an enormous amount of what you can legally do, your grandmother would be so proud of you.

We often feel weak when someone we love passes away but it's a stepping stone to build your strength on because you know she would be behind you all the way.

Please keep talking to us and don't be lonely and sorry that you had to wait a day or so.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[SammyD100]

Hi sometimesiwanttodisappear

I’m so glad you’re finding this forum to be helpful. It can be incredibly hard feeling isolated and alone, and feeling like you have no one. But I think what this forum shows is that there’s a community out there who want the best for you and to support you, and help you to feel like there’s a bit of hope?

I want to wish you a happy birthday for Saturday, especially given that it’s your 18th and such a significant milestone! But I’m not sure if happiness is really what you’ll be feeling, especially given that you’ll be remembering your grandmother. It sounds like she was really important to you, so it must be really traumatic thinking about what you saw and experienced when she passed away.

Growing up with parents who always fight with each other, belittle you, and disrespect you is incredibly hurtful and challenging. You don’t deserve to be treated that way by anyone, especially not by your parents who should love and support you. You are worth better than that and I hope that one day you can see that this is true, and really believe this.

I wonder what your grandmother would wish for you, for your birthday? I’m sure she would be hoping for you to be able to take some time out for you, to reflect on how far you’ve come in your first 18 years, and think about what it is you might wish for in the next 18 years?

I hope you can keep talking to people on this forum. There’s so much support and life experience, and people who have gone through some similar situations who can hopefully help you.

All the best,
SammyD

[Summer Rose]

Hi sometimesiwanttodisappear

I am so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you and your grandma had a very special bond and that you loved her very much.

As hard as it must have been for you, I think somehow you were meant to be with your grandma when she died. Of all the people in the world, I believe that she would have wanted to spend the precious time she had left before she died with you.

Now you two share a very imortant, special day. It belongs to both of you. Your bond endures.

You can honour your grandma on Saturday by visiting her grave, lighting a candle or through some quiet reflection. It's okay to talk to her. Many people talk with loved ones who have died.

Then I encourage you to celebrate your birthday. Big or small, quiet or loud, it's up to you. It's okay because you matter.

Happy birthday from me. I will be thinking of you and wishing you well