Too afraid to ask friends to hang out but so lonely..

[Mzzy]

Hi so this is my first post, it's just one issue I've had for a long time. I have general anxiety, social anxiety and mild depression. I've had it my whole life. Also I'm 14, not that you really need to know.. As it's the school holidays I want to hang out with friends, but I'm just too afraid to ask any of my 7 friends. We have a group chat on Snapchat, and some have sent photos of two of them hanging out, and I've actually never hung out with any of them one on one (there is a bit of complicated history in my opinion) I guess I'm scared they will say no, and then also scared if they agree. It sucks as I get upset and lonely when two of them hang out, but I think I shouldn't be as I should just ask. I really just want one of them to ask me, but they don't. None of them know I have social anxiety or mild depression, to be honest they don't know much, I do have trust issues. My brother is constantly going out with his friends, and it really makes me jealous as I want that. We did hang out and watch Christmas movies around 3 weeks ago, and I did suggest it, but that wasn't too hard as I was asking Everyone, but just asking one person to hang out is too daunting for me. If anyone can relate please tell me, or any suggestions would be nice. I just feel so lonely all the time.

[geoff]

hi Mzzy, I'm sorry for how you are feeling, but out of the group of 7 friends is there one person who may want to talk with you or perhaps look at you more frequently than the other 6 people or someone who points out something on a movie you're watching that relates to what you have said, then this is the person to ask because your ideas maybe very similar.

Remember they might be as afraid to ask someone just as you are, so if a discussion starts about kicking the footy, just say I'll be there or just front up.

Ask if one of them can help you out with a subject, you won't know until you ask. Geoff.

[Birdy77]

Hey Mzzy,

Welcome 😊

Hey you did really well, you invited everyone to the movies 3 weeks ago and that went well and wasn't too hard for you.

Why not try that again?

Ok so it's not inviting one on one, but if that's too daunting right now, just go with what feels ok and keep doing that until you feel comfortable enough to try the one on one thing.

If you hang out with everyone a few times, a one on one thing might just naturally eventuate with one of your 7 friends that you really click with.

The group invite thing is working for you ... go with what works for now, branch out to other things later. That's what I'd do.

🌻birdy