Severe anxiety disorder 24yr old

[Dee24]

Im really hoping to find somebody who can relate to me an who genuinely cares, long story short I was first diagnosed with anxiety at 15yrs it runs through my family but was triggered during me being silly an basically over dosing on party pills which led to a severe panic attack which just came out of no where I got a rush through my body then my heart just started beating so hard an so fast everything just went unrealistic i was crying screaming for my mum because I actually thought I was having a heart attack an dieing from then onwards I would continuously feel my pulse dredding another attack wich I had the next night then from then on anxiety, that faded away over a years time an I was back to la normal person, then 2years ago ago I was lying in bed really frustrated for no real reason an then noticed my arm was numb an heavy then I instantly panicked I got a big rush my brain started burning my vision went all funny I felt like I was about to drop through the ground and die I couldn't even walk I told my partner to call an ambulance because I thought I was having a stroke he had to carry me downstairs then the ambulance came an found a spider bite on my swollen numb arm, so that was just fantastic wasn't it I had a spider bite which numbed my arm an then I spun into having a panic attack an since my anxiety had faded I forgot just how bad it really was so from that moment onwards my anxiety was back in full force I had it morning till I feel asleep then Gradually over the months I would have a couple hours in the morning with out it a little bit more an more of my day without it and now I only get it around dinner time onwards, I only get anxiety and continuously fear I'm dying or about to have a stroke or a heart attack or a tumour in my brain is because I start to get dizzy then my head starts burning then my face an arm start to go numb then I get chest pain an get so dizzy that I have to sit down my symptoms are very real to me an scare the crap out of me and make me think I'm dying if I didn't get these feeling I wouldn't have anxiety an it can be quite difficult for me to relax as I have a 4 year old an a 23month old who are hme with me all day but keep me so happy an occupied I'm not taking medication because I am absolutely terrified that it will make my anxiety worse when I have come such a long way on my own but just can not shake the night time anxiety I've been doing really well on my own but bow I just really need some people to talk to 

[Dee24]

Also I do not drink or go out at night time at a All as I am terrified something bad is going to happen, another thing if anyone is on medication has it worked?? I have a prescription from my Docter but it's been sitting in my cupboard for over a year probley expired but I just keep it there because I don't know it kind of just makes me feel safe for some reason 

[white knight]

Hi Dee,  welcome to BB forum.

Indeed I have been in a similar situation at 30yo. I was so heavily stressed at work I had pains in my chest then at the doctors had an ECG (heart condition) and it came up abnormal. The doctor diagnosed a heart attack.

It wasnt until 3 months later at the epworth hospital in Melbourne after doing the stress machine test (where you walk for 15 minutes uphill with monitors on you) that I was found to have a good strong heart, no heart attack took place and my abnormal heart rate was "normal for me".

Now, as I had a panic attack instead, I underwent a long period of therapy including relaxation classes. The main things I got out of this were-

Being taught how to remain within the confines of being realistic

Relaxation

Being taught the significance of time to get over a crisis

The importance of medication in this process.

Self medication can have consequences.  I would remain under the guidance of your doctor with this- it is soooo important. You might think you know best but until you stabilise to his/her satisfaction it is crutial to take your meds.

Relaxation- deep breathing for 20 minutes helps. Slow deep breaths calms the heart and lowers its beats per minute. Relaxing - not just lying down...proper relaxation techniques really do work. There are a few types. The one I like is tensing up all muscles in the body one by one for 10-15 seconds then all the body's muscles for 30 seconds at the same time. You can even do this lying in bed prior to sleeping.

Dee I admire you. You are a young mum and you have made a big mistake with party pills. You then come to this forum asking advice. And you have two little ones to look after. You want to give them the best life you can.  Yet sometimes we have to mature beyond our years to plat catch up with wisdom. Hence this reply.

Watch out for triggers with anxiety. Being bitten by that spider as you said was far better than a stroke. Whenever you feel anxiety is overtaking your control remember- ask yourself- "am I being realistic with my thoughts."

Twenty six years after my panic attack I still ask myself this daily when I get worked up. So if this is ongoing with you and it highly likely will be, get the right advice, keep taking your medication and dont over react. Keep your thoughts real.

Good luck

[--Danny--]

Hi Dee, have you been to a doctor about anxiety? The medication can really help with severe anxiety..don't be scared of medication, it might be a possible option for you..in my own experiences with anxiety panic, medication helps relieve it greatly..but the decision is yours..maybe some counselling? Just don't give up,, 

Danny

[Dee24]

I haven't tried the medication yet but I do have an appointment at the Docter tomorrow an I'm going to ask for another script,  I feel at this point I really have done the best I can with trying to handle this anxiety on my own ino I have come a long way but the night time anxiety just will not budge which is why I have come in here to seek advise, I do have a loving partner who I have been with for 6 years but he just doesn't understand i feel like he just forgets I have anxiety or thinks it's just gone because I don't really like talking to him about it because I feel as if hel think I'm annoying or over reacting, when I do talk to him about it hel say something silly like start working out that'l work an then i get frustrated like this is a chemical imbalance in my brain I need some serious help not to go for a run an then hel continue that he knows working out will work an I get so frustrated at him because I feel like he isn't faking me seriously so il hide away in the shower an cry because I get so frustrated that he isn't doing enough to try to understand it help me when I have no one else ( as all my closest friend are in nz ) he is a great father an is very caring an loving towards me he just doesn't have anxiety and doesn't know how It feels to be scared it ur own body, sorry about that rant I just had to get it out, thank you for ur post tho I'm going to get on some meds hopefully when it comes to taking them my fear won't get in the way, I'm also going to try more with deep breathing an relaxation, 

[Dee24]

Yes I will definitely give the meds a try as I just want to feel normal again, yes I went to my Doctor crying an he did a anxiety or mental health check on me an out of 0 - 100 my anxiety was 86 percent that was when he told me I need to be on meds but I just couldn't take them I must say tho my anxiety has definitelyImproved on it's own my Doctor did refer me to a councillor but I did not feel comfortable with her i left after  2 sessions, I appreciate ur post 😃

[white knight]

Hi Dee,

We all go through a period of expectation from our loved ones when it comes to mental illness. I'm tempted to tell you to forget 'real' support from your loved ones. Very very few "get it". 

"cheer up,...look at the bright side" and on it goes.  They just dont realise they have no concept, no knowledge of depression or anxiety.

Best to keep your struggles to yourself until they ask. Then ask them if they are prepared to be educated or arent they serious in learning. If they are serious- fine, educated them and take them along to Dr's appointments etc. If not let them eive their merry lives without real care.

That's where I'm at with many people I'm in contact with. And its why I'm on this forum, among those that care and where I care enough to reach out.

[Dee24]

Yes I think I will just stick to talking on here an be more open with my doctor. I have an app Tomo I'm also thinkng of asking for a brain scan and a heart scan ino it sounds silly but when even I get anxiety an get chest pain an a burning head I just think I'm going to die so I'm hoping the doctor lets me do this for myself to put my mind at ease

[--Danny--]

Hi Dee, good luck with your doctors appointment tomorrow! Let me know how you go..take care,

Danny