School Stress

[134-_938]

I just turned 15 and I'm in year 9. I have been missing school for around a term and a half now, and it's affecting me really badly. I get so stressed about going to school and I have panic attacks every time I think about it. I suffer from depression, anxiety and an eating disorder and it's really hard for me to be in social situations. I have some really close friends at school and I don't want to loose them but I find it so difficult to be at school. I get so stressed just being around people and thinking about people judging me and my body. I have missed so much school that I am really behind now, which makes it even harder to go. I struggle a lot with Maths and I feel really hopeless right now and like I will never catch up. I am really worried that because I have missed so much school I won't ever catch up and that this is ruining my future for me. I feel so depressed constantly and I am really beginning to hate myself. I find that I am just lying in bed constantly feeling so empty and like I am worthless. My parents are really supportive and my school is trying to help me get there, and somehow that makes me hate myself more because even with all this support I can't even manage to get to school. I'm so scared that missing this much school will have a horrible impact on my future and that I will feel this way for the rest of my life. I moved schools a year ago and since doing that I have been too socially anxious to join any extra curriculars, sports or anything outside of school. I feel really alone and like everyone in the world is doing better than me, and I don't know what to do. I don't want to ruin my future but I find it so difficult to do anything. 

[Sophie_M]

Hey 134-_938, 

Welcome to the forums! We are so glad you are reaching out although we’re sorry to hear what’s going on, it sounds like you've got a lot on your plate and attending school has been difficult. It sounds like a cycle for you that missing school is feeding into making you feel a sense of low self-worth, we want to let you know that you are not alone and it sounds like you are doing the best you can.

Please try and be kind to yourself, it sounds like you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself about your future but there are always options and your mental health comes first. We know how difficult it's been for you but we’re really glad you could share this here though.  

Hopefully, we’ll hear from a member of our amazing community. In the meantime, we wanted to let you know that there’s a few places you can reach out to, whenever you need to talk things through and get some ideas for how you can get some better support. There are our friends over at KidsHelpline on 1800 55 1800, and you can also reach them online.  Please know that the Beyond Blue counsellors are here for you as well, and you can reach us on 1300 22 4636 or online any time if you feel like talking it through.  

Thanks again for posting here. Give yourself the permission to take time to recover and take your time in building things back up. We know it's a difficult time and it must have taken a lot of strength to share this, but you never know who will read this post and feel less alone in their own experience. 
 
Kind regards,  
Sophie M