Overwhelming sadness

[justalittlebitconfused]

It would help me so much if there was someone who feels the same way about me and knows why it is I feel this way and what I could do to help myself.

Over the past month or so, I've been feeling extremely nostalgic. Memories of events and my thoughts.

At the start of this year, I got myself a journal to write in at the end of every day. Just events that happened and things that were significant for me that day. However, it came to a point when I would forget some nights, and eventually, I ceased to write in it every day. I think it was at this point that it really got me.

I knew that I wasn't putting enough motivation. This lead to this extreme sadness that I will forget things in my life. I won't be able to remember and recall each moment that I live. Even small insignificant things. It's just so sad. That we forget. The fact that I haven't written for some days makes it even worse. I will probably never, ever remember that day. What I did. What I talked about.

Is there a word for such feelings?

And such thoughts, lead to much more.

The fact that I will never be able to experience life through someone else. That I won't be able to do everything that can possibly be done. Of how much I hate making conclusions about myself because I fear then that I won't be able to change.

How I hate thinking so much about deep issues because it hurts my head and just makes me sadder.

I don't think I'm going through an existential crisis. Because I know why I am here, and of things that will happen.

It's just these small things that cause me a lot of stress and anxiety.

Thank you for whoever is reading. It would mean so much for some words of understanding.

[ahw309]

Hi 🙂

Ahh when I read your post I really felt like I had to reply. I feel you 100%! It sounds like I was reading something I had written, especially not being able to remember everything that happens in our life!! and not being able to experience everything. I often get overwhelmed thinking about it all, especially how big this world is, how much there is to explore and experience, how much there is out there.

I wish I could offer some advice, but it's still something that frustrates, saddens, and frightens me. Though I am beginning to accept that this is the way life is, and even using it as a driving force to achieve the things I want to and to appreciate everything that happens and everything that I do get to experience despite how limited we are in some ways.

I hope the stress and anxiety this is causing you eases, but in the mean time, know that people understand and you're not alone in how you're feeling! 🙂

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi justalittlebitconfused,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for your post.

I have absolutely felt the same way, and I'm glad to see that ahw309 has replied and given you some great support.

This is something that I'd been thinking and dealing with a lot lately, and even though it's not an existential crisis it can kind of feel like one, because it's such a big concept to think about.

There probably is a word for such feelings, but it's probably Swedish because Sweden have cool words for things that we don't! If I find it I'll try and remember this post and let you know.

You will forget things in your life, even small insignificant things. We all will. Our brain constantly picks and chooses what's important and what doesn't seem important. This is what happens during sleep. It's in a way kind of sad because we want to remember all the things, but can you really imagine what it would be like to remember everything? What you had for dinner this time 5 years ago? If we remembered everything equally, it wouldn't make it special.

If I asked you what you did on April 1 2001 I doubt you could remember, but if I found a photo maybe everything would come back to you about that holiday in 2002 - this is kind of the beauty in memories. Instead of literally everything being filed away, it files away the important stuff. The stuff we really should remember. Which means each time we listen to a nostalgic song, we can basically 'go back there' and kind of re-live that moment. We can only do this because our brains are so weird storing such strong memories.

Seeing things from a different light can help because then you can see what memories you are creating right now. What do you want to be remembered for? What's important to you? What are you passionate about? What fills you with joy?

You said you won't be able to do everything that could possibly be done - do you want to play every single musical instrument? Do you want to spend your life collecting cards and stamps and magnets? My guess is that some of this stuff doesn't appeal to you - and that's kind of what makes life awesome too. Because if we could all do it all, we wouldn't be unique. We wouldn't have stories to tell. We wouldn't be able to connect with another person because we've all had the same experience.