No friends

[usernameusernameusername]

I was sitting on my roof just a second ago, feeling my usual standard combination of lonely, depressed, and anxious (hey, the trifecta!), and really felt like talking to someone just so I wouldn't downward spiral into dark, self-hating thoughts, when I realised - I have no friends. Sure, I have people I talk to over the table at school, people I'll hit up if I feel like smoking a little weed, but they're not really my friends. They'll laugh at a couple of my jokes here and there, and we'll have conversations, but they don't lead to anything. I have nobody I can talk to about my mental illness. I've only tried a few times - but each time I've been shut out of the conversation, or everyone there has just stopped listening. Worse still, one of the friends who I thought was being pretty good about all this, by offering advice about my recent breakup, has started avoiding me.

My "friends" can't be this outwardly cruel, right? That if a friend of theirs has a serious issue, they can't sympathise with him and offer at the very least, some companionship? I'm not asking for a cure, or even for a shoulder to cry on. All I want is someone to care about me. But maybe even that might be a bit too much to ask.

[romantic_thi3f]

Hey usernameusernameusername,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching
out.

It does sound pretty rough that you don't have
friends at the moment. Friends that can't be there for you in my opinion
aren't really friends at all. To be honest I would always rather have no
friends than have friends who aren't good ones.

I don't think it's too much to ask to want
someone to care about you. I care about you and I don't even know you.
That's part of why you're welcome here. Maybe it might be time to
start again; find some new friends who like you for you. Easier said than
done I know, but worth it.

[pipsy]

Hey usernameusernameusername. You sound incredibly isolated sitting on the roof looking at a lonely life. Having the acquaintances that interact at school, socially, but no-one who is there in your dark, lonely times. Reaching out is scary when you don't have the confidence to believe in yourself too. Apart from school, do you have any sort of social life, are you a 'social butterfly', but lack the courage to give 'life' a go? Have you checked the internet for social clubs/outings in your area? Cultivating real friendships take time and the trust required to build the friendships take time too. I have many acquaintances, few actual friends that I have deep meaningful conversations with, but I have found some of my colleagues are pretty good listeners, given the opportunity. With your school acquaintances, have you ever contemplated inviting them for an evening out? Maybe you could arrange to meet somewhere and try joining a club or something, see how you go as a social outing together. Unfortunately, some people are cruel and insensitive to others needs. These people I avoid as they are not good for me. Lynda