New to BB...

[Tazzie25]

Hi there, I have just gotten the BB app. I am 18 years old and I've been having a lot of trouble lately. I recently moved from my home town to a city (800kms away) to be with my boyfriend. I have absolutely NO friends. My best friend and I had a falling out once my boyfriend came into the picture because I wanted to talk to him often. But to be fair, he did live 800 kms away from me and her only lived a couple minutes drive away... I feel like I'm all alone. I feel like she has turned everyone she knows against me. I'm no more than just a human being. I'm no one. No one is ever there for me if I need it except my boyfriend and my mum if I have the courage to talk to her about my problems. I feel like I'm just a waste of space, like I'm an oxygen theif. Can anyone help? Can anyone give me some ideas to help me at least cope with this...? Thank you.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Tazzie, welcome to the forum! Moving to a new place where you don't know anyone is hard. You are in an unfamiliar area without the support network you are used to. It definitely takes some time to adjust. But please know that you are not a waste of space or an oxygen thief. You're just finding your footing in a new town. Do you have a job or any activities (sports, volunteering, creative hobbies) where you can start to meet new people? It can make the world of difference just to have a few people you can get out of the house and socialise with.

 

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Tazzie25,

Is it weird that my first thought when reading this was snap?!

When I first moved to the city I was in exactly the same boat; had moved up to be in a relationship and left all my friends behind, so I can definately relate.
The most important thing to know is that you're not an oxygen thief. What you are, is sad, which is totally valid. Losing friendships and being away from your home town is very hard. I actually read that it's just like grieving; because (like any loss) we have to find a way to adjust to a new life and new lifestyle here.

But it is possible. Are you working or studying right now? That can often be a great way to get to know new people. What about your boyfriend? Does he have any friends he can introduce you to?

Other options might be exploring a little further - what sort of things are around where you are; are there classes? Sports groups? Social gatherings? Any of those opportunities can be great to meet people. Even just saying hello at the local store can be a great start, and you never know where it could lead. I personally (being incredibly shy) started with online communities. It helped me to feel less isolated and build the confidence slowly.

Good luck!

[Narniakid]

Hey Tazzie25, welcome to the forums and thank you for reaching out to us.

I am sorry to hear that you've had a fight with your best friend. However, she doesn't sound like a very supportive friend if she had a falling out over something like that. She should be understanding and helping you cope and still be a fun person to hang out with, not get angry because she feels threatened.

I agree with Sophie, it is definately not easy to move away from home, so take advantage of this fresh start and try the opportunities available to you. I've made some fantastic friends through volunteer projects, studying, clubs and just picking up a part time job. You are NOT a waste of oxygen, and soon enough you will find some friends that will love to be in your company 🙂

Crystal