need some help/answers

[keyem]

Hi there,

Im feeling very confused at the moment about my emotions. I am questioning whether i have some sort of anxiety/depression as of late. i know everyone has bad days/weeks but this doesn't feel right. I had always been an outgoing, loud person but as of late i have definitely found myself have more down days that up. Not bad enough that i get can't myself out of bed, but once out i feel very unmotivated and am definitely not myself. Lately i have found myself upset due to the fact i overthink everything and criticise myself a lot, sometimes i don't know why.

Over the last year or so, i have noticed some signs of possible anxiety. When i would go out with friends to anywhere that there was a lot of people i didn't really know, i would get overwhelmed and cry and have to leave. Before events i would freak out by overthinking possible conversations and worry about how people might see me/think of me. In the last 4 weeks or so I have sort of been avoiding my close friends as i haven't wanted to do anything with them because i haven't been in the mood to chat or have a good time. I always find myself comparing myself to them which is making me feel a bit stand offish towards them. 

 Im not really sure how I'm suppose to be feeling, but if anyone has any criteria that i could possible look through that might give me a better understand of why I'm feeling the way i am that would be great. 

thanks

emma

[Jacko777]

Hi Emma,

Welcome to the Beyond Blue forums, I am really glad you are talking about this. Lots of folks here will relate to what you are talking about.

I guess everybody has a different cause for the way they are feeling, some times it can be physiological, some times it can be conditioning or a response to a life event, or all of the above. So an accurate diagnosis is the best place to start, you could see your GP or you could ring the BB phone service and they can help you find an appropriate professional in your area.

I have had success with talk therapy and I think it could help you to get some advice and some new tools to teach your self to control anxious moments and negative thinking. 

I have mentioned on this site before; it helps me to be clear about the important parts of my life, I put them down on paper, things like family, friends, home, career, nature, music, then in each area I develop plans to reach my desired goals, I work it back to what I can do today even if it is just a small step. I get satisfaction from knowing that I have kept moving towards my goals, keeping focus on the things I love. I practice dropping any useless emotion, I practice living in the moment, responding to life in each second as I expect of my true self. The more I practice the easier it becomes. I can see that if you are feeling anxious you may not enjoy company as you have in the past, I think if you can work on your anxiety you will feel like being social again.

If I have any anxious moments the first thing I do is my breathing exercises, I do 4 seconds in, 4 out, not too deep,  focusing on my breath and counting in my head, I tell myself 'relax' on the out breath, let it all go, relax the muscles. If I am having trouble focusing my mind I look to where I can give love or give thanks, there is always something to be thankful for, it switches off my emotional mind and turns on my heart. Love to you! 

Talk any time. Jack