Need Help and Advice

[MelodyWasHer2ndName]

I posted here a while ago about falling into another spell of depression and being terrified of making an appointment to see a GP to get a referral to a physiologist

I finally mustered up the courage to go see my GP and got a referral, however she told me she thinks it would be better if I saw a psychiatrist instead.  This surprised me a little, I didn’t think I really qualified for that, but obviously I’m worse than what I thought. 

I’m just waiting for the psychiatrist to get in touch with me to make an appointment, but it’s been nearly 3 weeks now and I’m starting to unravel a bit. 

I’m just feeling so incredibly alone; there is literally no one I can talk to about this. I’m good at hiding my problems, my ex-boyfriend is the only person in the world who knows I’ve got depression.  I’m very shy and talking to my friends about this is just not an option, I’m too scared they won’t understand, they are all happy and normal people with no experience with depression.

I find myself feeling tired every moment of the day; all I want to do is sleep.  There is nothing in my life that makes me happy or gets me excited.  I just feel like an empty shell.

I’m beginning to worry because, although I’ve had depression before, I’ve always been able to carry on with day to day life ie. going to work, looking after myself.  But lately I’ve been calling into sick to work for no good reason other than I just can’t get out of bed. I’ve also found it hard to make myself eat, it just seems too much of an effort.  I’m scared that I’m getting worse and I don’t know what’s going to happen to me.

I just really need some support until I start seeing this psychiatrist, but I don’t know where to turn. This site is very helpful, but I’m wondering if anyone knows of any support groups in the Brisbane area that I can go to.  I just feel I need to interact with people in person and force myself to leave my room.  Being shutup all the time in my room and nothing doing anything active is starting to take its toll, I feel so lethargic and alone.   

I’m very scared of social interactions, but I know I have to deal with this if I’m ever going to recover.  I don’t really have any hobbies or interests (which is something I dwell on a lot because it makes me feel like a boring, useless person) but if there was some sort of depression support group that got together for social activities I might be inclined to go because I feel I could relate to the people in the group. 

I hope someone out there can help.

[JessF]

Melody there's an interesting contradiction in what you write above. You say that you can't speak to your friends because they're all happy and normal, yet you admit that you are good at hiding your problems and only your ex-boyfriend knows you have depression.  Have you thought that maybe your friends will be more understanding than you think?  We all show our best face to the world because we are terrified of what other people think, and in doing so often cut ourselves off from the support that could be right in front of us.

[Neil_1]

Hi Melody

Welcome back to Beyond Blue and thank you for providing this latest post – nicely set out and detailed and I can also pick out a few positives with it also, but I’ll get to that.

Firstly though, I am not sure of what support groups might be available in Brisbane – maybe a google search for that sort of thing. Well done to you Melody for getting to see your GP – I’m hearing about how stressful that would have been for you, so a huge pat on your back for achieving that. 

What has surprised and actually ticked me off about this is the psychiatrists lack of care for you.  Three weeks is way too long.  The trouble with this I’m guessing is that you most probably don’t want to get back to your GP to discuss this again – but I think it’s one of two choices you have with this situation. 

Either get back to your GP (or possibly phone) to let them know this ridiculously long delay for even receiving a phone call from this psyche.  Or alternatively, do you think you might be able to phone the psyche (well, you’d get their receptionist anyway) and to organise an appointment for yourself. I do find that situation most odd though – as it’s usually up to the client to make the call to the psyche so you can arrange your appointment(s).

I also find it odd that your GP just provided you with a referral.  Did they not give you any indication as to possible medication that they may suggest for you?  I’m just a bit concerned for you Melody, as I know how much effort it took for you to make and attend this appointment and yet, it just seems that they didn’t provide you a complete kind of service for you.  I may be reading your message wrong though.  I hope I am and that you felt you your time was well spent.

I see other positives that you are well aware of how you are and you realise that things need to change and that you need to address things – that is absolutely great.  And the initiative of trying to seek out support groups and I believe you just need a little bit more of a push or something to help you kick-start things and you’ll be able to take that next step for trying something different.

Now Melody – you say you don’t have any interests.   Can I run some by you and can you let me know what you think:   clothes shopping, movies, dvds, shoes (oh come on, just about every girl that I know anyway, seems to have a fetish for shoes), books/reading,  etc.   I’ll bet there’ll be something in the ‘etc’ part.  🙂  

Just with the way you write and express yourself I don’t find you one bit boring or useless. The length of this reply to you is testimony to that.  🙂

I do hope you can write back to us soon.

Kind regards

Neil