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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Jade12 Back
  • replies: 33

It's been a while since my last post. I am feeling really bad right now, and struggling so much. I feel unloved, worthless, and useless. I am constantly alone and dont have the opportunity to get out, because I dont yet have a licence. My boyfriend a... View more

It's been a while since my last post. I am feeling really bad right now, and struggling so much. I feel unloved, worthless, and useless. I am constantly alone and dont have the opportunity to get out, because I dont yet have a licence. My boyfriend and only friend hardly ever wants to see me since he is so busy with uni. I too often sit alone in my room and turn all the lights off and cry. I am facing suicidal thoughts, and having previously self harmed I am struggling to keep my head above water. I feel like the world would be better of without me because so many people in my life complain about everything I do, its as if effort does not matter its only if you do or dont succeed. I thought the world was a better place and I wish I could meet someone who could care for my existence because I feel like there is nothing in this road ahead, only pain and suffering. Each day is just the process of enduring more and more pain, eating away at you nerves, eating away at who you think you are, who you are and who you want to be. I dont what to do. beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Ravenna I just want the pain to stop :(
  • replies: 1

I've been feeling really anxious, depressed, angry, alone and even a bit suicidal for the last two and a half years. I've recently told my parents and my brother, I haven't told them about my suicidal thoughts though, I don't want to freak them out o... View more

I've been feeling really anxious, depressed, angry, alone and even a bit suicidal for the last two and a half years. I've recently told my parents and my brother, I haven't told them about my suicidal thoughts though, I don't want to freak them out or tell them why. They were reassuring when my school counsellor told them about my self harming and depression. I find it hard to talk to them about stuff. I used to talk to my friend Michael but he told half my year about my depression and suicidal thoughts. I told him that I didn't want to be friends anymore, because every time I would tell him something he would tell others and he always made excuses, a couple of times he's gotten me so angry that I would self harm. Michael would continuously hurt me and I'd always forgive him, but he was such a good friend. Did I make the right choice?I've been feeling depressed and alone for weeks now and I just want it all to go away. I want the anxiety, the pain and the anger to all just go away. My emotions are everywhere all the time, I feel as if I have no control over them. My emotions rotate from angry to sad to alone to anxious to stressed to tired but I constantly feel depressed and angry. Is there something wrong with me? How can I take control of my emotions? I just want it all to go away. I feel so stressed out, I'm a type one diabetic and I've recently changed my insulin and have had to take extra precautions with what I eat and its just stressing me out, sometimes I forget to do my insulin and I just get so angry. Sometimes I'm afraid that if i can't control my anger that I'm going to break something or hurt someone.I just want it to all go away and control over my emotions.

rediris Scary thoughts
  • replies: 9

I am in a constant war with myself. Sometimes I will be so happy as though nothing can hurt me, but other times I will want to end my own life. I sometimes have these fits of anguish and I will literally scream and destroy things. I developed depress... View more

I am in a constant war with myself. Sometimes I will be so happy as though nothing can hurt me, but other times I will want to end my own life. I sometimes have these fits of anguish and I will literally scream and destroy things. I developed depression and anxiety at 12 and now I'm almost 18. I want to show everyone at school how much pain I'm in. Only I've given up going to school. I've scared my family, I've lost friendships and I can only find comfort in animals and made up fantasies.The only thing that has kept me going is the aftermath of if I did something to myself; the lives I will destroy. But I honestly see no future for me. Im so sick of living like this...beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Taraa no friends= depression.
  • replies: 5

Okay I'll try to make this short and sweet. So a little over a year ago I lost all my childhood friends from the town I lived in when I got a boyfriend and moved. It all started over silly stuff (mainly a friend of mine from where I live now did some... View more

Okay I'll try to make this short and sweet. So a little over a year ago I lost all my childhood friends from the town I lived in when I got a boyfriend and moved. It all started over silly stuff (mainly a friend of mine from where I live now did something they didn't like and hated me and my partner in association) So it took me a long time to pick myself up from that as I lost my best friend, and like 10 other close friends, neither the less I manage to get over it enough to move on.\ So a month ago, my friends (I didn't have a lot to begin with; I had that many friends that they all knew each other) yep. So my guy friends were going to have a lan party (is a night of drinking and playing computer games) so it was all organized and then one of my friends decided to change the day, and it was obvious is was because his girlfriend could drink all night (it's hard to explain but he basically picked his gf over his brother) so I kinda just pointed that out and in a nice way, this resulted in my friends gf cracking it and getting drunk and bad mouthing me behind my back to my best friend (who lost her mum about a year ago and apart from her bf I've been her rock and she always says I'm her only friend) and evidently this so called 'best friend' has bad mouthed about me back. so in conclusion two brothers and there girlfriends all of which live together: all aren't talking to me and my partner even though we were like family. (need to mention that the girlfriends hated each other!) So basically I have lost the ability to trust. I cant stop crying. I feel like I'm screaming and no ones listening, and nothing my man says really fixes me. I feel like I have no friends. I've been a victim of bullying most of my life and having friends is something i feel i need to be okay. Some one please help advice anything. thanks for reading!

byan For a long time I denied that I had anything to be depressed about.
  • replies: 5

This year I've noticed a change in how I feel about many aspects in my life which is generally helpless. I've been in a relationship for around 18 months now. He ticks a few of boxes & makes me laugh, but I know deep down that he can't make me entire... View more

This year I've noticed a change in how I feel about many aspects in my life which is generally helpless. I've been in a relationship for around 18 months now. He ticks a few of boxes & makes me laugh, but I know deep down that he can't make me entirely happy, because I feel like I can't talk to him & he brushes off my issues. I'll try mentioning them to him but his responses (or lack of) will just make me angry. My parents constantly make it known to me that he isn't right, but they make me angry because their reasoning will be for completely superficial issues like how he dresses, the fact that he doesn't spoil me with material things like 'how it should be'. If we shouldn't be together, their reasons differ to mine. What doesn't help is seeing my brother's success. For a while now I've felt my parents are much prouder of him than me, with his career, how he is always busy studying. Though I'm also a uni student and fill up the rest of my time between two jobs, I always feel like it's never enough, and they'll always see him as more than me. I feel it's also because they love his girlfriend more than my partner, and constantly make known to me that they do, and this is how it should be, so I'm ashamed to say that I'm jealous for those reasons. I know that their idea of who is good for me completely differs to mine and they make me feel selfish for wanting what I want. I've been told by my mother that because of my current partner, I don't care about my family anymore, I'm selfish, I'm ungrateful for what they've done for me, I'm a hypocrite, I don't have any morals, and that I'm not nice 'like I used to be'. It hurts more because I used to have a close relationship with my mother, but she's told me that that has long gone because of my current boyfriend, that it's my fault. I tell her that it's because she's been pushing me away, but I'm always made to believe that she's always right because she's the parent, even though I am 21 with opinions and I thought I knew what's best for me. I always thought that my issues weren't big enough to seek help for and I'd brush them off, being 'silly things', that I should just get over. But I've gotten to a point where I just feel empty and am in need of advice. I at least feel a little better just writing this and confronting it. I cry a lot in private and know I should stop feeling sorry for myself, feeling more pathetic and more worthless. Thank you for reading this far, any advice would be appreciated.

ExhaustedandTired It's my first time posting in a forum...
  • replies: 4

Hi guys, I am new to this and not too sure where to begin... Ever since I was in my mid high school years I have always been that person seeing the school counselor and clinical psychologist outside of school. I was constantly seeing my GP, doing the... View more

Hi guys, I am new to this and not too sure where to begin... Ever since I was in my mid high school years I have always been that person seeing the school counselor and clinical psychologist outside of school. I was constantly seeing my GP, doing the K10 test and getting a referral. I haven't found any of the cognitive approaches given by psychologists to be helpful and I feel that I am going in circles trying things that don't seem to work. I am in my second year of uni and I do not have motivation to do anything, studying is a massive effort as is getting up in the mornings (It doesn't help feeling constantly tired and drained). I feel that the psychologists I've seen have somewhat indirectly (and most likely without meaning to) trivialised my feelings. I'm not sure if I should be on antidepressants. I have been feeling like this for over 5 years. I feel sad and unsatisfied with my life, I lack any real friendships and as a result I feel constantly alone. I struggle to commit to any goals and lack confidence and self-esteem. I am quite mature for my age, and sometimes I feel like I am my own psychologist, I know only I can fix this but I don't have the tools or the energy. Someone help?

Dreamer13 Newbie
  • replies: 5

Hi Everyone! I'm brand new here so thought I'd make my first post. I was diagnosed with depression in December and have had a bit of a bumpy ride since. In the space of a few short weeks my girlfriend of a year left me, I lost my job and had to move ... View more

Hi Everyone! I'm brand new here so thought I'd make my first post. I was diagnosed with depression in December and have had a bit of a bumpy ride since. In the space of a few short weeks my girlfriend of a year left me, I lost my job and had to move out of a rental I was living in with some friends. After all that happened I felt like everything had just come crashing down. I was also a bit confused about this illness too as the diagnosis was still fresh and I had to get used to taking medication daily. I'm 24 and hadn't known of anyone my age who was dealing with this, so I also felt a like it was a weakness. I'm still learning and feeling my way through handling situations and trying my best to stay positive. I guess the main problem I have is I overthink things a lot and have a bad habit of putting myself under pressure. I sometimes feel that I can't trust myself to make correct choices and that the few changes I've made to try to get myself on track will come crashing down on me again. I've been wondering what strategies people with more experience with the illness would use to combat the constant low feelings. I tend to write when I'm feeling depressed as that's how I've always expressed myself, but usually turns out quite dark and hard to look back on. Are there any universal strategies people use to get themselves back up again? Or is it something one learns for themselves?

anie21 Unsure about depression
  • replies: 5

Hi everyone, I am a 21 years old and having been dealing with my low moods for about three years now. I am an unsure as to whether I have depression or anxiety, because I think I refuse to believe that I would have it, or maybe I am just over reactin... View more

Hi everyone, I am a 21 years old and having been dealing with my low moods for about three years now. I am an unsure as to whether I have depression or anxiety, because I think I refuse to believe that I would have it, or maybe I am just over reacting? Anyway, growing up I was always a happy kid, who never cried and always was smiling, (despite having a bit of a rough childhood) and I always was active, attentive in school and had lots of good friends. However after I finished high school I fell into this black area where I just started crying at every little instance...I am assuming I was all miserable because I had left school and felt lost and scared about going to uni etc. First year uni went smoothly, it was when I started second year was when it went down hill. I went overseas for two and a bit months and put on a bit of weight (keep in mind growing up I had major self-esteem issues) and so when I returned in the summer I just felt so fat and hideous. This is when I really started to hate myself. I know how it feels to have an off day about how you feel you look etc, but this feeling of hate and sadness was something I had never experienced before. The following year since my return was a roller coaster of wild emotions. I just felt so worthless, I would go out a lot (drink and party) to subside any emotional pain, but I just feel so bad about who I was. I did start exercising again, so my holiday weight did drop off, but during the time of hate I started self-harming. Not in an attention seeking way...just it was a way to cope with the pain/hurt/anger. Anyway, this year I have been feeling the same...not about my looks this time, but just life in general..even though I shouldn't be. I have a great life: I've got one degree and now onto my second doing what I love, got a great group of friends, good family, boyfriend, etc. but still I feel empty and worthless. Maybe it's just the stress of uni? But this past month I have been all over the place and feeling pretty down and crying all the time, and as I said, I hardly ever cry. It feels like that dark place I was about a year ago. Sorry about this post being a bit all over the place too, I guess because my thoughts are a bit scattered! But it feels good to write. I guess, is it worth going to see a doctor about how I am feeling? Thanks for reading

Penpan Ruining my relationship, please help
  • replies: 3

Hi, I'm 23 years old and am in a relatively new relationship of 14 months. I had a 6 year relationship from 15-21 which ended quite terribly. While I was single I learnt to be independant, I got a whole new outlook on life, became more confident and ... View more

Hi, I'm 23 years old and am in a relatively new relationship of 14 months. I had a 6 year relationship from 15-21 which ended quite terribly. While I was single I learnt to be independant, I got a whole new outlook on life, became more confident and did the things I wanted to do, travel and enjoy being young. When I initially met my current boyfriend things were great, I was happy confident and excited about a new relationship, however, the more serious we got the more my feelings of insecurity and fear from my old relationship came back. It has been going on for a whole now and I only recently told him what I was going through as we have been fighting alot, mainly because of me. I get jealous when he talks to girls (just being friendly), I get scared he's going to break my heart in some way and spend my days over thinking, worrying about if he still loves his ex, when in reality he has been nothing but amazing to me and shown me for the last year that I'm the only girl in his life. I work in a job that i absolutely hate with a passion, where it's just me in an office and all I do day in day out is over think to the point where It drives me crazy and I start crying. I have no desire to wake up in the morning as I know what my day will consist of, my over thinking and making up scenarios in my head to worry and feel insecure about. I come home so miserable and down and evidently I take it out on the people who love me most, my boyfriend and my family. I need help as I'm turning into this person I never want to be, I'm never happy, always doubting myself and scared of getting heartbroken again. I have seen a phycologist, but I feel as though she didnt help, mainly because she was telling my things i already knew and that I need to "start thinking positive". I wish it was that easy. It's gotten to the point where I'm pushing everyone away, I need to be happy again and enjoy my life. Would anyone recommend anti depressants? Do I need to end things with my boyfriend? Or do I need a new job to keep me busy and stop me from constant everyday worry. Please help

Bec_Luke feeling down
  • replies: 6

Hi everyone. This is my first post for quite awhile. Sorry it's been long, but I have been feeling better lately. But i feel as certain things are getting to me. Today iv just been feeling down I am feeling a bit isolated and am lonely. I feel I'm ju... View more

Hi everyone. This is my first post for quite awhile. Sorry it's been long, but I have been feeling better lately. But i feel as certain things are getting to me. Today iv just been feeling down I am feeling a bit isolated and am lonely. I feel I'm just having that time where everything just feels just ****. I am starting my training up again tho I know that shall keep me slightly occupied. But i feel I have no one beside me who cares much. However I do know I have you guys on here, iv just been up and down. Hope all is well and hope to hear from some one soon bec

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