Moods.

[123anonymus]

Hi, I'm a 16 year old female who has been depressed since I was 13, clinically diagnosed. I'm confused on what this is but whenever I am getting into a relationship with someone I like them then get into moods where I don't. I'm trying to be happy so that the relationship will work but I dont know what's wrong with me. The happiness is going and my depression is coming back. I get into moods where I dont like people or want to talk to them and I dont know how to stop it. Will I be like this forever? Will I never love someone because of my illness I dont know what's wrong with me, if anyone could know please comment or something.

[Birdy77]

Hello 123anonymous,

I'm glad you've come here to talk and get some support, you are amongst friends here who understand the weird stuff depression does to our minds and lives.

Your questions "Will I be like this forever?" and "Will I never love someone because of my illness?" ... I will go out on a limb and say you have so much to look forward to in life and and in love.

Being a 16 year old girl, in my experience, is an extremely confusing and up-and -down time in it's simplest form.

Add depression on top of an already weird time of life, and it's doubly confusing.

So please don't be too hard on yourself.

There are hormones going nutso for you at the moment, and all sorts of changes in your body and mind, so that could account for the feelings of liking someone and then all of a sudden not. I remember being like that too ... I would like someone and then if they showed interest it was exciting, and then something would happen, and I'd be like "eeww, get me out of here what was I thinking?"

So please don't feel like you're alone in the confusing feelings that you're having.

I hope you feel you can come back here and talk some more.

We will listen to you and care about your wellbeing.

🌻birdy

[geoff]

Hello 123anonymus, welcome and thanks for posting your comment.

I'm sorry you have been diagnosed with depression at such a young age, this always upsets me, but it's common to withdraw from people when you suffer from depression.

These moods you get yourself into, need to be investigated because if they are high feelings and then suddenly feeling low could represent Bipolar depression, but I'm not qualified to say, a doctor can do this.

From my understanding, these moods you want your partner to get into could be the depression saying to you 'that I want a partner but are not able to cope with it', so it might be the 'Push and Pull' relationship where you may have a false feeling of security.

You could lose interest and pull away causing the other partner to wonder what they have done wrong, so this situation becomes very confusing and perhaps you are afraid of any commitment.

Your depression could have developed a long time ago, where all you desperately wanted was someone to love but instead pushed away

So you become the pusher and lose interest and pull away causing your partner to wonder what they have done wrong.

People you can contact are Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 and 'eheadspace which is online or Reachout

1300 659 467.

Please let us know what you think. Geoff.