It is all too much

[Georgia05]

I don't know from where to start. I feel that I hate who I am, I hate how my life is at the moment and I hate that I don't do anything to change all that. I've been overweight basically all my life and recently I managed to lose 20kg and I started feeling good about myself and being positive about the future. However, since I went back to uni after a gap year all the negative thoughts and feelings came back. I have no self belief that I can make it. I feel I'm not good enough and I'm not going to fulfil my goals. I doubt myself with everything I do. I tend to compare myself with others and wanting to be more like them and wondering why am I not like that? As a consequence of that I started my old eating habits and that makes feel even worse as I put some weight on and I dislike myself even more. I just wish I wasn't like that. I wish I was stronger and find ways to overcome all these and find a way to be happy.

[JessF]

Hello Georgia, one of the problems with depression is that it throws big problems at us all at once in a clump and it seems overwhelming. The key to getting stronger and coping is taking steps, sometimes very small ones, each day towards a set of goals. For example, what is one thing that you could do tomorrow towards getting fit? It may be as simple as a 5 minute walk around the block every day for a week. If you make your goals small and achievable, change can happen almost without you noticing, and when you look back at your progress you'll be amazed at how far yo have come.

[the_motorcycle_boy]

Hi Georgia,

Maybe a book on Self-Esteem might help? It teaches you healthy ways to think about yourself and others. It also empowers you because you are learning things you never knew before, things that are eye-opening and effective.  If you like, check out the thread "Boosting of Self-Esteem" it  holds more information.  Best of luck with it.

Henry

[geoff]

dear Georgia, I'd like to welcome you to this site.

From reading your post I am quite sure that the course you are doing is what you want to do, and I only say this because you had a gap year, lost a huge amount of weight and began feeling good, but as soon as you go back to uni you begin to fall into these depressive thoughts, comparing yourself to all the other people, and feeling as though you are not as good as they are.

I'm sure that many of these people would love the chance to lose that amount of weight, because this is a great achievement by yourself.

What course are you actually doing, and there must have been a reason why you took a year off.

How would you feel about not doing this uni course, and then redirect all your efforts into doing something else. Geoff. x