I feel lost with uni and am worried I'm amounting to nothing

[SMFB93]

I have nearly finished a three year degree at university,and yet I dislike it immensely and have lost much of my drive to finish it (it is worth noting that I only started this course because it was the only one I was accepted into). I feel that my dislike of the course is potentially more of a reflection of my dislike for the uni itself.I never lived on campus,therefore the opportunity to make new friends appeared to be very slim for me,as most,if not all other peers in my lectures conversed mainly about residence stuff. From my first year onwards,I felt completely alienated from the university lifestyle,leading me to feel rather apathetic towards uni in general.

I lived in a sharehouse for much of last year,which improved my social life a bit,but I am now back with the parents,as part of an ailing plan to move out of my hometown (where my uni also is). This has really isolated me to the point where I doubt if I even made any friends at all in the time I was in a sharehouse.

This year has been,for the most part,a confused mess. I still don't have a clear life direction or set goals at the age of 21.I understand that to be normal for someone my age,but I am at a complete loss as to what to do with my life. The only times I've really felt happy this year have been when I've been at music festivals/gigs (I'm a massive heavy metal fan) and the occasional meetings with friends (which have steadily declined since I moved back home).

I am sick of having no ambition,being tied down doing a degree I hate,and feeling isolated and alienated.

[Jacko777]

Hi SMFB93,

Welcome to the Beyond Blue forums. I am glad you are talking about this and I bet many will understand how you are feeling.

I guess getting through a University degree is a massive challenge and as you have nearly finished it might be good to try and get over the line. Regardless of the course, I think a lot of employers respect that someone can get through Uni, it proves that you can apply yourself to this intense study and activity. So I think this hate that you feel can be reduced, you need to conserve your energy to apply to the things that you choose to do. I think you can change your perception about the value of your study.

Most of us would relate to having difficulty finding direction in a career, it is a juggle between our ambitions and the need to make money. It helps me to know exactly what I am passionate about, the things that get me going. I think about the things that I would do even unpaid, these things bring me satisfaction. It's not always possible for me to combine my passions with an ability to make an income so it is a compromise, I can still do both.

Is there a counsellor at your Uni that you could visit? It helps to get everything out on the table to have a good look and make a fresh plan. Sounds like you need to go to more gigs and festivals, do you play any instruments yourself? It might not be easy but you could try and organise more meetings with your friends, if it makes you feel good, do it! 

Favourite band? I'm pretty fond of Tool and RATM, not exactly heavy metal but close. There was a study released a few weeks back showing that heavy metal reduces depression in young people. Rock and Roll.

Jack

[SMFB93]

Hi Jack,

Thanks for replying.

I guess much of my hate for uni stems from the fact that the uni is in my home town,and that my degree (journalism) has a lot to do with covering what's happening locally,which I find uninteresting because I don't really like my home town.I am motivated to finish as I really want a degree to my name,but my lack of passion for journalism I feel makes it difficult for me to stay focused.Music journalism is perhaps the only exception. I guess I just have to stick it out,only another few months and I'm done I guess.

In answer to whether I play a musical instrument,I do play guitar (have for nearly 10 years),and if it wasn't for time constraints,I would love to be in a band,heck,I wouldn't even mind giving up my job for that (I have a part time job) if it meant I was happy.

And Tool and Rage Against the Machine are definitely heavy metal!!! I guessed you were a Tool fan based on your profile picture! Two amazing bands that are both unique.I am also big on bands like Slipknot,Machine Head,Slayer,Deftones etc. I did read that article on how heavy metal reduces depression in young people.I can certainly relate because I always feel better when I chuck a heavy record on. In fact,Tool's one of my go-to bands when I wanna drown out and clear my head.

Thanks again,

Sam

[Jacko777]

Hi Sam,

Thanks for replying. I do think you can change your perception about your journalism degree. If you can prove that you can produce worthy news stories in your home town then you can do it anywhere and that is what your future employers want to see. Perhaps you can imagine that you have flown in from out of town to find the best stories, try and refresh your view of your town.

I could go on about good story telling and it's importance, so critical to an intelligent and aware community. Good story tellers can make a big difference in the world, as you know. I am a video editor in a network TV station, I edit news, current affairs and lifestyle programs, working with journos every day, I am glad to help you if I can in any way.

'In the realm of the human spirit the strong force that binds us together in a single communion is THE STORY'.

Jack

[Jacko777]

And YES!!! You should be in a band, great way to meet new like minded people and mostly, rock out. Who knows where it can lead....

Jack

[Felicity308]

Hi Sam,

I know how frustrating it can be feeling like you don’t have any direction. I was the same at uni and would get so frustrated when no one would help and would say that uni’s easy because you finally have a choice about what you do. I'm 24 and I’ve only just worked out what I want to do with my life – I may change my mind again but I think I’ve worked it out for now. It may be no help at all but these are a few of the things I wish someone had told me while I was at uni (hopefully there’s something in here that can make you feel a bit better):  

Uni & work are completely different: I was told this but didn’t really believe that I wouldn’t really use anything I studied at uni when I got a job. Employers just wanted to see that I had a completed degree and all the people I worked with had completely different backgrounds.  That's why I think it’s really good you’re sticking with Journalism!  

You won’t learn what you want to learn: Your lecturers probably aren’t teaching you all that much about journalism in the music industry so I can imagine it’s pretty hard to stay engaged. You are on the right track by sticking out your course and working towards your plan of moving away (possibly somewhere you have the opportunity to get a job in the music industry). Waiting to get to that next stage will be the hard part though so I’d suggest distracting yourself with things you do enjoy. I think Jack’s right, a band would be a great way to meet new people and do something you love.  

One degree can get you a lot of different jobs: You've probably heard this but even if you end up deciding a career in Journalism isn’t for you, you don't necessarily have to start again. I’d suggest going and having a chat to a career’s counsel about different jobs you can use the degree for or even going and speaking to someone in recruitment about what transferable skills you have and what direction you could take.

Hope some of this helps!

Felicity