First heart break in the gay world

[Braddles17]

Hey there guys , I'm only 19 and I'm dealing with a heart break no other ... my first love since coming out of the closet I had serious relationship with someone who was 27, 3 months into the relationship he asked me to move into his house, of course me being new to all of this dating world and living 2 hours away from him I did .. things were going great we worked out buts off , I managed to hold 2 jobs and paying him half my way towards his house loan,

we have Thailand booked in 12 days for a holiday .. we planned that this year we'd move into a family memebers house save money and plan to buy another house in a few years ..;

fash forward 8 months and he wants nothing to do with me .. he dumped me the morning after a night out clubbing .. he woke up and told me I wasn't what he needed anymore and he drove me to a train station and left me

I took a 2 hour train ride home and I was devestated .. with only the back pack on ny back from the night before he blocked my numbers, social media and everything ..

he has left me broken and numb ; I am dead set so empty inside... we went from a three bedroom home

to now me sleeping on a mattress on the floor at my parents house ; even now he refuses to contact me and tells me he needs to get himself help.

Me snd him were not perfect you guys but what we had was amazing when it was good .. he tells me i need to grow up , our age difference plays a big part .. he's not coping mentally with what ever he's going trough and that he needs time to work on himself ... my heart is destroyed because what happened to everything me and him had planned ? What happened to the promises he made about never giving up on us ..

he promised to never just walk away from me and he did .. it's been nearly a week and I can't pull myself together ; I just want him back so badly and he has no idea how much he has destroyed me ... I worked 2 jobs for him , I changed my lifestyle for him and my friends .. I did everything he asked me to do in order to make him want this and he just threw me away like I'm a piece of rubbish ... I legit don't know how I'm gonna manage without him but I guess I have no choice ., he was my first love and my first everything ; I can't get the little things about him out of my head , like certain smells , certain memories of laughter and silliness or just our little cuddles

I don't think I'll ever be happy again or find myself a true love .. and it's killing me holding this in .. please help me 😞

[Doolhof]

Hi Braddles,

I'm so very sorry to read your story, having your heart broken in such a way is devastating. It may be very beneficial for you to ask your Dr. for a counsellors appointment to discuss this with someone professional. If you can't dot hat, than sharing here will help.

You may want to phone a service like Legal Aid to see if there may be a way you can receive recompense for all the money you put in to the relationship, you may be entitled to part of the property or something. I am sorry, but it sounds to me like this guy used you to help fund his own lifestyle.

You have said how much you love this guy and how much you miss him, I am very sorry you are hurting so much. It is hard to understand and comprehend why this has happened.

Do you get on well with your parents? Can you discuss anything about all of this with them?

You can also use the phone help line here at 1300 22 4636 if you need to talk to someone. They are very helpful.

The main thing right now if for you to find ways to keep going. To look after yourself in all of this.

Broken hearts can be mended, it all takes time. Take a few deep breathes, let the tears flow and try not to let your heart turn to stone. New love can happen.

Take care from Mrs. D.

[Lonelydan]

Hey Braddles, you must be in such terrible pain right now after such a whirlwind of a relationship. What that guy did sounds cruel and heartless to me. I'm also thinking he had a hidden agenda. Why were you paying half his mortgage if your name wasn't on the title. Sounds interesting to me as it's something I wouldn't do myself. Have you called to see if you can cancel your holiday and get a refund or go by yourself I've been to Thailand is so much fun. In relationships especially your first few are about learning it's so much harder for gay relationships most of us don't have that experience till late teens. So we don't develop those skills like the straight kids who have innocent childhood relationships and the freedom to express their feelings, boyfriend and girlfriend for a day or week and once in high school that all changes. It's easy to loose your identity in a relationship you gave up a lot to be with him he didn't and his probably a lot better off thanks to you I hope you remain strong you sound like such a nice guy don't let this get you down mate it will hurt but you will get over this and my advice is to think of only dating guys your own age. You're young mate I wish I was 19 again get out there have some fun don't wast the 20 minutes you get to be young. Danny...