Feeling So Alone

[Gnair3]

I don't usually do anything like this... but I can't stand it any more. I'm so lonely its driving me insane. I cant even sleep at night and I feel so lonely even when I'm around other people. I feel so cut off from others and have no real healthy relationships in my life. At school im the class clown that everyone laugh at because I do stupid stuff all the time. But I do it because when people laugh sometimes is easy to forget that they're laughing at e and not with me. For a while it even abated my loneliness but now its still come back. I have a group f friends at school who tolerate me but even when I'm around them i feel so disconnected from everyone and everything. I always feel so incompetent, slow, clumsy and I hate how I look. Inside and out...The loneliness is becoming unbearable and i feel like my head is being ripped apart. I cant stand it any more and I guess this thread is my way to vent.....

beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

[Jacko777]

Welcome to the Beyond Blue forums Gnair3, I am so glad you felt safe to 'vent' here, you can talk here any time. Perhaps it is time to get some professional advice on this do you think? It's possible that there is something behind your feelings of loneliness and disconnection and I bet with professional support and advice you can work on this and come to feel much happier.

So...have you talked to your parents about this? Could you ring the Beyond Blue phone service or talk to your school counsellor? It's a good time to move on this, you can make a fresh plan that brings you to calmness and happiness. Try and stay focused on the positive things in your life, cut your self some slack for a while and practice letting the negative thoughts float away and replace them with positive ones. Think about the things you love to do, the things you are passionate about. Might also be a good time to check your diet is healthy and make sure you are doing enough exercise. Hang in there mate, I know you can make this better, stay in touch.

Jack

[blondguy]

Hi Gnair

Paul here....I am sorry that you are feeling the way you right now....

You are a legend for getting 'on here' and venting to start with....Nice1

You can and I hope you do.....get on here and vent as much as you wish....You are not on your own here and you are not posting to a computer....Its private and secure....There are many kind people that are very willing and proud to hear you vent and respond to you (if you wish of course) Gnair....

Here if you need us....there is always someone here.....and dont forget that number for help at anytime 24/7 1300 22 4636

You are brave....

Paul

[Fairywings]

Hello there firstly i just want to tell you how brave you are admitting that you feel as if loosing control of things. I understand how terrifying this is for you. Speaking from a youth worker perspective in which i am There is an incredible amount of help for you and there is nothing wrong with seeking professional help through either a councilor  psychologist or psychiatrist whom will help you and the fact that you reached out to this site is fantastic first step in helping you get better. Stay strong stay positive you will beat this.