So long story short, I was in a relationship with the most amazing guy for almost two years and it just came to an end recently. I have been dealing with depression anxiety for many years and he has been the greatest help, and I’m really struggling now.Short story long:He is my absolute best friend, we were best friends before we started dating and up until the end we had the most harmonious and loving relationship. I feel that I have to also mention that he is my only friend, I only have friendly acquaintances apart from him. I don’t want to go into specifics about why it ended, but I did something bad and we were forced to reconsider our relationship, but we felt that we could probably work through it if it weren’t for his family. He has very strict muslim parents who never approved of us and who I have never met, and when we broke up I finally found out that if he were to ever marry or even just move in with me, his family would disown him. But despite breaking up, we were still seeing each other pretty much every second day, doing everything that we used to except without the “in a relationship” title. While I was so happy to still have him, I’ve been really upset just because I can’t imagine a future without him, I had planned a future together and I guess I was counting on it. So a few nights ago I got really, horrifically drunk at an event and got with someone else. We had sex very briefly, before I pushed the guy off because I realised what I was doing. I know I probably shouldn’t have, but I told my ex what happened because I’ve never been in the business of keeping things from him. He’s very guarded and didn’t show how he felt about it, but it’s fair to assume that he was quite angry and hurt. After I told him, I also spoke to him about how I’ve been feeling in regards to us; how upset I’ve been about the break up etc. I know in retrospect that I shouldn’t have spoken to him about this, but my clinging to him pushed him away and he has told me that he needs space and will talk to me when he’s ready. I don’t know how long that will be, and I’m honestly terrified that we will never speak again. >There's honestly a lot more to this story but I would rather not go into it publicly.
>Does anyone have any tips on how to stay away or distract myself? I don’t have a lot going on in my life and I miss him so much it’s driving me completely insane
