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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Depressed4life I need new friends
  • replies: 2

I have a few friends (I pushed everyone else away) but the people I kept are so toxic to me I want to push them but I can't because I already pushed everyone away and i don't want to look like a loner at school , I have anxiety and depression and can... View more

I have a few friends (I pushed everyone else away) but the people I kept are so toxic to me I want to push them but I can't because I already pushed everyone away and i don't want to look like a loner at school , I have anxiety and depression and can't make friends

Sammy_is_having_a_good_da Accepting one's self
  • replies: 2

Hey people I'm new to this page nice to meet you, To be honest I just don't know who I am anymore or maybe I don't want to know who I am. The actions I have made completely go against who I was and all of my morals. Me before would look down upon me ... View more

Hey people I'm new to this page nice to meet you, To be honest I just don't know who I am anymore or maybe I don't want to know who I am. The actions I have made completely go against who I was and all of my morals. Me before would look down upon me now. I'm struggling to accept my newly emerging identity because I don't think it is a good one. Do I try to go back to who I was? Do I continue as I am now? Sorry, I realised I'm just saying the same thing over and over again. From me

Dyllan Someone help
  • replies: 1

I feel like I am wasting away the short like I have. The main issue is I feel like a robot. I'm not in control of anything I do. I feel numb and that my body makes its decisions based on the past motions I've adopted. I'm not in control of most thing... View more

I feel like I am wasting away the short like I have. The main issue is I feel like a robot. I'm not in control of anything I do. I feel numb and that my body makes its decisions based on the past motions I've adopted. I'm not in control of most things I do. I feel trapped. Stuck, brainwashed into a world and society I may never understand. I struggle with basic things normal people wouldn't. I can't hold a conversation with so many people due to the face that I can't focus on any topic, nor can I process the information that I hear/see. I have a constant worry of being judged and on what the thoughts of others are towards me. My trains of thought last 20 seconds at most. Everything I do I end up putting off because " I'll do it later" . I can't read a book. Oh the feeling I would have if I could sit down uninterrupted, even in a quiet room and read a book. Not due to the fact of not being able to read; I'm a very confident reader. More due to the fact that I can't remember what I read, nor can I focus on what I'm reading in the present time. The sentences make complete sense, but I just can't remember because as I read, I read the words while my brain has inner thoughts on other topics. I feel like I am smart enough to accomplish anything; but the focus I lack is holding me back along with the lack of attention/ people skills. In my head everything seems so simple; be introduced to new knowledge, study and remember that new information, store the information in your mind then unleash it through your senses when need be. Why isn't it that simple? As I write this I'm struggling to not look away and think about my surroundings, or anything else that randomly pops into my mind. This is the first time ive let out my thoughts or even wrote about them. What do I do? All I want to be able to do in life is study a topic, remember what I read then outsource that information in a smooth, confident manner. That, and to be able to hold a social conversation with another person and not forgetting what's been said. I don't feel; I never feel happy, sad, or angry. Numb. What do I need to do to fix my problems and live a happy life. When I watch other people communicate I try to watch, listen and learn what is it they do to be able to hold the conversation so well. It turns out awkward when I try to do it. I'm out of space.

Depressed4life Family life is shit want to leave
  • replies: 6

my dad constanly ignores me and yells at me i feel worthless and not loved at all i want to leave but i have no where to go what do i do?

my dad constanly ignores me and yells at me i feel worthless and not loved at all i want to leave but i have no where to go what do i do?

charlotteeeee confused and need help
  • replies: 2

i didn't know where to write this because i honestly can't say that i know what i'm feeling. lately (since around the start of the year). i've been going through some friendship problems and have been very stressed out with school and work so i don't... View more

i didn't know where to write this because i honestly can't say that i know what i'm feeling. lately (since around the start of the year). i've been going through some friendship problems and have been very stressed out with school and work so i don't know if i'm worrying over nothing or not. i haven't been eating very much at all, one or maybe two small meals a day because i've been feeling too sick to eat. i am constantly feeling upset and down and i don't want to be around my friends that much anymore because i usually just feel upset when i'm around them (i just like to be alone a lot). i can't concentrate on a lot of things because i am worried about other things i am constantly overthinking every little thing and when there is a stage when i start to feel a little better i just start thinking about all the negative things and things that are going wrong and start to feel like shit again. i find it really hard to talk to people even some of my closest friends and so i feel like i'm constantly holding my problems in, which makes my moods worse. also i am close with my mum but i never talk to her about anything that i'm upset about. i just need some advice and someone to tell me if this sounds serious enough to talk to somebody about because i'm sick of feeling this way but i don't know if it's just a faze or if i just don't want to admit anything to myself.

rosewater School counsellors?
  • replies: 4

Hi, I was wondering if anyone here has spoken to their school counsellors before and if they've had any success. I'm planning to make an appointment with my school counsellor (university counsellor, actually) soon. I am hesitant because I tried speak... View more

Hi, I was wondering if anyone here has spoken to their school counsellors before and if they've had any success. I'm planning to make an appointment with my school counsellor (university counsellor, actually) soon. I am hesitant because I tried speaking to one in high school and I kind of struggled a bit to connect with him and get him to understand what I was feeling. He gave me very generic responses such as 'focus on graduating, things will get better in uni, take walks to take your mind of things'- I'm wondering if that's all the advice counsellors are qualified to give? So I don't know if making this appointment will be worth it. I don't have the money to see an actual psycologist, and I'm assuming I might have to wait a while for an appointment. I don't even know how different it would be to just seeing my counsellor. So if anyone here has spoken to a counsellor before I would appreciate if you could share your experiences, or if anyone could explain to me more about what the role of a counsellor is and how they would be able to help me, that would help a lot as well. Thank you.

nemolivesinananemone Young and Living with Bipolar Disorder (Also a Nerdfighter)
  • replies: 1

Hi, so you can call me Nemo. I have a diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder, but that's not who I am. I'm an artist and an intellectual and I have a wonderful family and two wonderful friends, one who lives across the city river and one who lives across the ... View more

Hi, so you can call me Nemo. I have a diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder, but that's not who I am. I'm an artist and an intellectual and I have a wonderful family and two wonderful friends, one who lives across the city river and one who lives across the world. I've found it difficult to integrate my experience with Bipolar Disorder with my story in a social context. Its not only the fact that I have experienced mania and spent time in the hospital, but also the fact that I've had depressive episodes that happened mostly at home, alone, quietly. Or the fact that sometimes I get very anxious for no external reason other than the fact that I have a mental illness and that can be part of the gig. How do I own my story without alienating others, making me feel like an outsider? Has anyone else managed this? Just existing with it but not letting it be a defining thing about them. I think Carrie Fisher and John Green do a great job of this, but I'm wondering how other 'ordinary' people deal with acknowledging their mental illness without it becoming a definitive part of how others see them?

Nickname_AD7FECE8-2D7C-49 Confused and Disorientated
  • replies: 1

Hey Guys, I've been doing a lot of reading for a long time (about 2 years) surrounding depression and anxiety with their corresponding symptoms. To be honest I feel like personally I align with a lot of these symptoms especially in the last year as i... View more

Hey Guys, I've been doing a lot of reading for a long time (about 2 years) surrounding depression and anxiety with their corresponding symptoms. To be honest I feel like personally I align with a lot of these symptoms especially in the last year as it has gotten a lot worse. I have cut myself off from nearly all of my friends (except the ones willing to put up with long bouts of silence and erratic behaviour) and I've been feeling so down that sometimes I sit in my desk chair all day (mostly writing and staring at the screen) whilst constantly worrying about my inactivity. I've moved out of home recently and that hasn't exacerbated the problem at all but now that my family is so far away and I don't have anyone around me that I know very well. I feel more isolated than I ever have in my life, not that I would ask anyone I know for help with this as I wouldn't really want them to worry about me. Even though I have moved here with a friend he lives on campus while I live in a sharehouse and he is not really interested or aware of my moods. I was an idiot to cut myself off from all my friends but I can't seem to help it. But to some extent I'm not sure if I am depressed I'm 19 and some people have it some much worse than me. I'm young and still really a teenager and I can be prone to ridiculous mood swings that can last for weeks and I have no control over. I dont want to hurt myself, I just feel incredibly apathetic. So much so that I think if something bad happened to me I couldn't really bring myself to care. I'm not really confident enough to talk about any feelings that I have with anyone as it causes a lot of embarrassment for me, even happy feelings are something I dont feel I can express to anyone. Normally, I just put up some sort of erratic childish comedic facade. I can't seem to accept the fact that there could possibly be something wrong with me as when I'm low, I'm very low but when I'm on a high it's like it never happened and that I worry about nothing. This has been going on for years and I think I've written it off as just teenage hormones but now I'm really worrying about it to the point of being catatonic. But I don't know if it serious enough to actually get help for. Thanks for reading the ramble.

Starstorm A loner who has been silent for years
  • replies: 3

Hello everyone. I am new here. I am a 19 y/o girl who is currently studying in Brisbane. I have been fighting depression, social anxiety and eating disorder alone for years and nothing is working. I come from a single parent family. My father committ... View more

Hello everyone. I am new here. I am a 19 y/o girl who is currently studying in Brisbane. I have been fighting depression, social anxiety and eating disorder alone for years and nothing is working. I come from a single parent family. My father committed suicide at home when I was 6. Since then, I was unable to form normal friendships with the opposite sex because I don't know how to. Every time I am put in a social setting with boys, I panic and others misunderstand me as expressing fondness to them. My mother is controlling and invades my privacy from time to time(through internet). She has stolen my money before and asked me to borrow money from finance companies. I come to Australia not only to study as an international student, but also to escape from home. Everything has been so overwhelming. Knowing that I am too pessimistic, I retreat from others. My mother always tells me not to trust others because they have ulterior motives. I know it is false. But I can't help but distancing away from people. I am always in a dilemma. I am so alone, but I choose to stay alone. I have been to Brisbane for half a year and almost everyday I am by myself. People have asked me out before, but social gatherings put a strain on my finance(my mother does not regularly send money here), also I do not want to deal with the stress while meeting people. I can't stand how others judge me. My overthinking is drowning me literally. So recently, I eat alone, dress alone, go out alone, travel alone, study alone. Yes. I am that of a loner. I start to feel numb to life. I can't feel a thing, as if nothing really matters anymore. It is worse than death, similar to walking dead. I am afraid people would talk behind my back and rumors. I avoid everything at all costs. Still, I am extremely miserable. I can't even muster up the motivation to do the things I like (e.g. art and writing). I just give up hoping. But I am not attempting to die. Just stuck in between. I would want to ask for advice and possible connection. I feel like I am drifting in the middle of the sea and is sinking. Could anyone help me please?

Emen Life problems I dont know how to solve
  • replies: 1

Hi I am new to this and not really sure how to express myself but I feel like there are problems in my life that are only getting increasingly detrimental as I get older and I can no longer sweep it under the carpet. To give a little background and c... View more

Hi I am new to this and not really sure how to express myself but I feel like there are problems in my life that are only getting increasingly detrimental as I get older and I can no longer sweep it under the carpet. To give a little background and context to this, I am a 22yo male recently graduated from uni, living with my parents with a casual job and unable to progress to the next phase of my life. While I know its just a matter of time for this to pass there has been an aspect of my life that has been a plague to me ever since puberty. As it stands right now I have never had a relationship and as someone with an INTJ personality type I know I shouldnt overly concern myself with it at this age nor does it bother me that much. The reason I am here is because as I get older I get increasingly lonely, as I have friends that are there for me, but as they move on in their own life I cant rely on them for all my social and physical needs. Situations have risen in the past where I could have gotten close to people but something inside me triggers that makes me ruin it or cut all ties from them entirely. I am a very solitary person and feel like its my own responsibility to resolve my own problems and I have managed well to this point. However there is issue in my life that I have done nothing about apart from bury it and hope I can move past it with time. This issue stems from the fact that I was severely abused (mostly physically initially, more mentally as I became older) by my mother from birth up to even now, albeit significantly less. As this being the normal state of being since my existence I never thought myself affected or even in an abnormal situation. At the age of around 14 I became aware of my situation as I matured emotionally enough to view myself as an independent entity (as opposed to the lifeless husk I felt like living as a child), which led to depression and just generally being confused with life. After many years of soul searching and trying to repair myself to an acceptable level where I feel like a normal human being, I have found myself at an impasse, where in I dont have the ability to receive or reciprocate any form of love or anything beyond a superficial connection with anyone (including family) in my life. Right now there is someone in my life that I can form a relationship with, however, as with in the past, I find myself extremely disgusted at any form of companionship or commitment with another person. How do I continue?

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