Anxiety sleeping someone new

[ellie456]

Help!!

Over the last year every time I go away for a night with friends or even staying the night at a friends place I can never fall asleep and end up having a panic attack and leaving.

I’ve now started to avoid doing it all together.

I never use to have this problem, only on rare occasions.

Does anyone else go through this and if so how do they overcome it?

[Doolhof]

Hi ellie456,

Welcome to the community here on the forum. Sorry to read you are having these hassles.

Are you able to talk to your friends about what is happening before you leave? If you did so, do you think you might be able to stay the night?

Do you have a sibling or one close friend whom you could stay overnight with somewhere. You could tell them of your problem in advance and ask for their help.

If you did this, you might be able to replicate things you do at home before you go to bed. Even take your own pillow or something else that is familiar with you.

Have you been able to work out what it is that is causing the anxiety?

Would you feel comfortable talking to a Dr about it? They may be able to make some helpful suggestions.

I really do hope you are able to find solutions.

Cheers from Dools

[LavenderTea]

Hey ellie456,

Thanks for posting.

I can imagine that this would be really crap for you. I understand that avoiding the situation is the most common,a and most reasonable thing for you to have done, but it's important that you don't avoid it forever. When someone is experiencing anxiety, or having a panic attack, the most natural thing to do is avoid the situation again, but this does not help the anxiety in the long run.

With the situation you've described, it sounds like you couldn't get to sleep, which then led to some thoughts/concerns/worries about not being able to get to sleep, which then made you begin to feel anxious, and this just continued in a cycle until it became a panic attack. If this is what happened, then it might be useful to identify what those thoughts were, and consider why they led to those anxious emotions, and then possibly challenge those thoughts.

It is important to note, however, that if this is becoming a big problem for you, it might be helpful to talk to your GP about it so that they can recommend you to someone who can help you work through these feelings.

Feel free to keep posting!

LT.

[emzza]

Hi ellie456,
I'm sorry to hear you are going through this because I too have this problem and it honestly feels good that I'm not alone in a way.
I struggle sleeping in my own room sometimes due to sleep paralysis, nighttime paranoia, etc, and have come up with my own ways to cope with this. I usually listen to music loud enough to drown out any noises and I have a mood light on, as well as my fan. These work for me to control my sleep problems at home but obviously you cannot always use these things when you stay at someone else's house.
I find that I too avoid sleeping at friends houses due to having panic attacks over not being comfortable sleeping in a foreign room. I am still struggling with this myself, but so far I have found that if I talk to my friends that Im sleeping over with, about my problems, then they are always very understanding and willing to help in any way, such as allowing a small light in the room or music playing.
I know I cannot help much but I hope that it at least makes you feel better knowing that someone else struggles with this.
Good luck!