Hello everyone,
i have never posted about my life on any of these kind of websites, but I have heard a lot about beyond blue and finally decided to reach out for some advice. I just need some non bias opinions on my situation. So basically, me and my boyfriend just got back together recently after being broken up for about 2-3 months. We had had a really good relationship beforehand, but then the 'honeymoon' kind of ended when we both went back to school (seperate schools). I started to become impatient as he didn't seem to have time for me (he was usually choosing friends over me, and was very dedicated to his sport) I was getting tired of following him around and was starting to feel quite lonely and found myself thinking of myself with other people and if it would be better. Recently before that he had gone on a holiday and came back to tell me he had cheated (unintentionally). At this point near the end of our relationship I was feeling lonely and sad but was afraid to end things. He was getting frustrated because I couldn't voice why I was feeling this way, when I found out later it's because the trust was gone, and there wAsnt much left holding us together. We ending things mutually, and moved on. We still talked now and then just over messages, and we're talking off and on for about 2 months. We started "talking" again and flirting after about 2-3 months. We had a few fights during this period but somehow kept coming back together. We both admitted we missed each other and still loved each other. We decided we wanted to try again and make things work this time. I was really happy at first, then my anxiety made me second guess my feelings and attraction toward him. It passed and I was again happy that we were trying again. Everything was going well for another two weeks, and now my anxiety is back. I second guess his feelings for me, my feelings for him, if I'll get hurt and every time he talks about going on holiday or going to a party I get anxious because it triggers that memory of when he cheated. I know he would never want to intentionally hurt me, and I no from the facts that he loves me, but I can't seem to get it through my head. My anxiety also makes me feel ugly and worthless and I don't want to talk to him about it as I don't want to be attention seeking. Please give me advice on what I should do or how to manage this.
thankyou in advance:)
