16 and feeling very depressed

[CloudyKayla]

I'm 16, I've been feeling sad for a some time, I remember my mum saying she thinks I'm depressed about 3 years ago. 

I don't really have anyone to talk to and I'm bad at talking about my feelings. I sometimes self-harm but try not to because people notice and it makes me feel worse about myself.

lately I just don't see the point in living, I'm doing bad at school, I see no future for myself, I don't have many friends and I honestly don't think anyone would even notice nor care if I was gone. 

Im posting here because I don't know what to do and I don't want to see a councillor.

the only reason I haven't ended it yet is because I'm scared it won't work and I don't want to have to explain myself. 

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[beingbyrne]

Hi Mikayla, 

I have just noticed your post, but have to go out so I'll be back later and will reply. Talk to you soon. Hugs…..mrs byrne

[beingbyrne]

Dear Mikayla,

You said, you don't want to see a counsellor and you don't know what to do. But the thing is when we don't know what to do, we need help from others. What about talking to a GP first. There are GPs who have special interest and experience in mental health and there is a list of those practitioners on this website so you can find the closest to your home. 

I am really concerned about you, and you certainly sound very depressed. May be a psychiatrist instead of a counsellor would be a better option for you, because they don't focus on cognitive therapy like counsellors, they usually try to treat people with medication as they are medical doctors. But the bottom line is….you have to start somewhere in order to get some help. It's not fair for you to live like this, you deserve better….so go ahead find a GP as a start.

I hope this was helpful and you get help very soon. And in the mean time just keep talking to us, we are here for you as much as we can.

lots of hugs

mrs byrne

[papercut]

hey mikayla.

not sure if this will help alot but i think we are in similar situations here...

I'm also 16 and i always am feeling like crap. i hate school. Ive been mostly socially excluded my whole school life. Ive lost  motivation to do schoolwork and i find it hard to concentrate 100% of the time. when ever i hear the recess or lunch bell go off i just dont know how to feel anymore.

i am living with a chronic auto-immune bowel disease and when i was in hospital barely anyone at school asked where i was. ive been in and out for years and still not many cared.

i self harmed once, and my parents were certainly of no help. but like you i felt worse after....

i have thought about taking it further, but if it failed id just be lost.

i tried seeing councellers and a psychologist but i just felt worse.... i always feel paranoid and i dont know what to do....

sorry if this isnt of any help. if you want we can talk about whats going on here. hope for the best

[CloudyKayla]

Hi mrs Byrne, 

I feel uncomfortable saying that I think I have a problem (in person) and I've tried telling y mum I'm not happy but she just kind of brushes it off and i dont have any other family members that i trust enough to talk to about it so I cant really  see anyone.. 

Thank you 

-Mikayla

[beingbyrne]

Oh…..Mikayla… I know it's hard to open up about our weaknesses some times and admit that we need help. But the reality is that there is nothing wrong with that. Because we are only human, and we all need help from each other from time to time. And professionals are the best for that because they are not involved with you emotionally and it is their job to help you ( they actually get paid for that). And don't forget….it was their choice of career….so it must come naturally to them, just like working on a project. It's their job to be understanding and non-judgemental, so it's the safest environment to open up about your problems. If you look at it that way, then you realise you've got nothing to worry about. And I speak from experience, trust me. 

So don't be afraid and get the help you deserve. Because you worth it.

Hugs……..mrs byrne

[CloudyKayla]

I understand what you're saying and maybe I will see someone soon.. I can't really go anywhere unless my mum takes me and I'm working every night and go to school so that means no time either.. 

Oh well I'll be fine..

thanks again

-Mikayla

[CloudyKayla]

Hi papercut, 

Im sorry you feel like this.

i see we are sort of in the same boat. I don't try in school anymore either but my mum doesn't care, she wants me to leave school but I don't know what to do. 

Feel free to message me whenever you need, it's good to talk to someone who feels the same.

-Mikayla

[geoff]

dear Mikayla, and I'll reply to Papercut later on, the words that you say 'Oh well I'll be fine', always seems to be answer so that it won't become an issue for anybody to worry about, but yes it does send out warning signs to those of us who have been through depression like everybody on this site.

It's something that does need attention and can't be kept swepted under the carpet, because at some time down the track there is an enormous lump that forms, so something has to be done, and the same principle applies with depression but in a more serious way.

Some psych's work after hours and this is something that the BB list of doctors/psych's will be able to let you know.

Please we implore you to make this effort before it becomes too 'much of a lump' to handle. Geoff. x

[CloudyKayla]

Hi Geoff, 

I do know that I should do something but I'm just scared to have to open up to a stranger about all my feelings and such.. I can't even open up to people I'm close with.. 

I will look into it though because I do want to feel happy.

thank you 

-Mikayla