New to Beyond Blue but not new to life

[Deadpan]

Hi all,

My introduction

Thought I should join to gain more insight into life, I am nearly 50, I live with a alcoholic abusive girlfriend for going on 6 years and have a permanent employment in a industry that favours a younger generation.

While I still see simple beauty in life, from nature, knowledge and other avenues, perhaps my expectations on life are unrealistic to think people can be better than what the media and the world shapes them to be.

I know I can't change the world but I believe that the only time you ever look down on a person is when you are helping them up, irrelevant of their race, religion, skin colour or sexual orientation.

Thanks for reading,

Deadpan

[Croix]

Dear Deadpan~

I'd like to welcome you here to the Forum, and I think you will find there are many here who go beyond the superficial portrayals of humanity in the media. We are all volunteers, this place is not run for money, and we have learned from our own misfortunes how necessary the contact with and help from others can be. The world has shaped though trial, and the result is often pretty good.

It is true popular media does tend to concentrate on the superficial, I guess that is where life experience can help. I'm not sure what to make of your saying you have permanent employment in a young person's industry.

Perhaps it can be looked at two ways. It can be isolating if you do not have a lot in common with the majority there. However it is also an opportunity for them to learn from an older person's wisdom and experience. Sadly no doubt only a few will do that. I've been lucky for the last couple of years and have known great pleasure and fulfillment in passing on my knowledge.

You sound as if you already have insight into life, may I ask abut your girlfriend? Alcoholism is a pretty tenacious addiction, does she have any professional support?

While you are here I'd like to suggest you have a look around, you may find, as I have, there are opportunities to lend a helping hand.

Croix

[MsPurple]

Hi Deadpan and welcome to the BB forums. It is great to have you hear

I agree with Croix, you seem to have insight into life which is good. 🙂

I also belief in treating everyone with love and compassion.

I am glad you have joined the forums. Thought I would pop in and say welcome

[Deadpan]

Hi Croix, thanks for you reply,

It is abit hard to talk as being a male I don't say much about my feelings, To explain my employment in a young person's industry I am the only one over 30, so I have a expectation of 0% error because I can't get away with 'my bad' excuse. Basically its about only very few are responsible for mistakes, but due to the fact that if I looked elsewhere for employment that I rarely wouldn't be judge for my experience and work ethics, but be judged for my age. So I don't look for a better opportunity, I apologise if that sounds harsh but it is what I have experienced.

I possibly wouldn't talk to much regarding my girlfriend, despite my feelings I do respect her. To explain more I haven't been a hypocrite as I occasionally drink my self, but she drinks approximately 10 maybe abit more bottles of wine a week. Saturday night is usually 2 to 3 so I make myself scarce due to avoiding anything to trigger the abuse that can sometimes go for up to 6 hours, basically until she exhausted reasons on why her life is so terrible and its all my fault.

While I have researched and carefully tried to help explain options for a better relationship. So far all I have gotten is talk of change but no actions. Meanwhile my hobbies and interests are losing any importance in my life. I haven't played any of my game consoles in a couple of months, I am struggling with my reptile hobby and other interests aren't much importance.

While a mystery to me, my life consists of work, come home wash clothes or vacuum, sometimes mow or tidy yard and on weekends dust, mop floors, all to lessen stress for my GF . All she does is cooking.

I hope that some of this clears things up, otherwise I can possibly expand some areas,

Kind regards ,

DP

[Deadpan]

Hi MsPurple, thank you for the welcome,

While I might have some insight into life, I am like many others that still have trouble navigating life. I have encountered that due to being a large framed guy at 180cm, most would not understand that I am a kind hearted pacifist that only reacts to wrong. I am like my mother in that respect, that despite her hardships she had a inner beauty.

Kind regards

DP

[blondguy]

Hello DP

Thankyou for your excellent thread topic.....and welcome too 🙂

I am nearly 59 and understand where you are coming from. You mentioned "I know I can't change the world but I believe that the only time you ever look down on a person is when you are helping them up, irrelevant
of their race, religion, skin color or sexual orientation." What a wonderful post

You are doing a great job where expressing your feelings are concerned DP and good on you! The forums are a safe and non judgemental place for you. Your privacy and well being is paramount to Beyond Blue

I lived with a girlfriend that was also an abusive alcoholic in the 1990's....

you are not alone DP

Thankyou for being a part of the forum family 🙂 I hope you can post back when convenient for you

my kind thoughts

Paul

[Deadpan]

Hi Paul,

Thank you for kind thoughts,

While this sounds naive and simplified, if I could have one wish it would be for the world to be blind for a day, on one side you have the negative people lost with nowhere to direct hate and anger, on the other side people to be free to be themselves.

Regards,

DP