Dear Doneandout
Hello and welcome to Beyond Blue.
First let me assure you that depression is no respecter of persons. No matter what your life circumstances, how much you have or don't have, your age or gender, you can become depressed. And getting over it is not a task for you alone. Yes it's true that must work at it, but not on your own. I think you would be amazed at how many seemingly strong people become depressed.
What you are describing is very familiar to most people here. At the risk of sounding flippant I will say, been there, done that, got the tee shirt. I really wish I had not been there. I too have a great family (children and grandchildren) and friends who are immensely supportive. I also need an antidepressant, which I have only recently resigned myself to, and a counsellor.
Do you need either of these? Well of course I don't know. I suggest you see your GP as soon as possible. That feeling of losing yourself is very hard to manage. It saps your energy, makes you walk around as though you are in a daze, and prevents rational thought. Rational thought in this case is that you did not let yourself get so low, you are stronger than you think, and getting well again is a joint effort between you, your GP, family and others your GP may want to add.
So, putting on my grandma cap, go and see your GP and have a good chat. Book a long appointment as this cannot be dealt with in 15 minutes. I hope you will do this soon and that you will return to BB and tell us more about yourself, but only as much as you wish.
Mary
