Lonely but not alone

[EsCee]

Hi

This is my first post. I'm surrounded by people in my job, I am a single mum of 2 teens but I gave up everything I dreamed of to get married and have kids. I've given it my all and am now a single mum and the 2 teens are at that typical teenage stage. I don't take their attitude as personal but it does hurt and I can't set goals for myself because I can't afford it, or I feel guilty for doing something for myself.

I used to love my job but leadership is new and doesn't value my contribution. I will move at the end of the year but it means starting new and having to build new relationships and trust in the new organisation. 

I have friends but feel like they are superficial not deep and understanding friendships. I am rarely alone but feel empty and lonely.

[joshakajay]

Welcome. It’s brave of you to join a community like this and share your story of your current situation. I can imagine how tough it is handling two kids alone.

I personally can relate to the feeling of longing for deep and meaningful friendships over surface level conversations with friends and acquaintances who may have been around a long time but never really dived in deep with you.

I also know what it’s like to give your all to a relationship and feel like you have to start all over again, and also understand how financial limitations can have an impact on following our dreams and goals. But don’t feel guilty, you are doing something proactive right now by being here. You’re not alone. I do hope that your move will be a nice change of scenery and open doors to new potential connections for you!

[EsCee]

Thanks for your reply. I think just being here and writing it down makes it all feel that little bit easier to handle. Knowing other people feel the same helps too.

[smallwolf]

Hello and welcome to the forums,

Thank you for sharing your story - that takes strength and courage.

It sounds like you’ve carried a lot for a long time, giving so much of yourself to your kids and your work. And as a side-effect it makes sense to feel lonely and drained... even when you’re surrounded by people. It’s okay to want something for yourself too, and that isn’t selfish, it’s part of taking care of yourself. In order to look after others, you also have to look after yourself.

What are some things that you like to do?

Listening ...