Alone

[amel1997]

Hi, just wanted to introduce myself! First timer here. I’m a 21 nearly 22 year old female. Ever since I started high school I jumped from friend group to another friend group and this continued on all the way through school. In year 8, my ‘friends’ actually ran away from me at school and hid at lunch so I couldn’t find them. Made new friends again and eventually they ditched me. At one point, I had no one to sit with in classes or lunch and it was the worst. I just didn’t want to go to school anymore. Went to college (year 11/12) and had the same friends, then everyone just lost touch after that doing their own thing and no one bothered with one another.

It’s so upsetting because it shouldn’t be like this. Everyone I know has their own groups now and it really sucks seeing posts or them around and I’m stuck at home alone. I have a great job and get along with everyone there but nothing really comes from that. I don’t really feel anxious about going out or talking to people either.

Everyone I know of is part of the clubbing/going out and drinking all the time. That’s not really who I am, and I’m fine with that in way but it’d be cool to have friends who were in the same boat. I’m basically at home all the time and hang out with my parents because I feel all alone and like a loser. Sometimes they make subtle jokes how I have no friends and that kinda hurts but I just play it off.

I just don’t want to waste my life away sitting home alone. I’d like to meet a guy one day too, I want a husband and kids like most people and I haven’t gotten anywhere. Haven’t even had a boyfriend because I have no one in school really. Boys didn’t look my way that’s for sure!

[Sherrybaby]

If you have an interest in something like a hobby then joining a group, class or organisation is a really helpful way to find like minded people to develop friendships. I wish you all the best in your journey.

[amel1997]

Yes I really need to do that, it’s just finding a group/organisation to join where I live. There isn’t a whole lot of choices but that’s all right. Like I said before, I like talking to people. Part of me feels nervous that I will get rejected again or nothing will happen from it

[Smile31]

Hi Amel1997,

I'm really sorry to hear all that, but well done on reaching out on here, I've found the BB community to be so very helpful in dealing with my own issues. I too, do not have a lot of friends, I moved here from another country about a year and a half ago.

I'll share what I have found has helped me. Going to my local cafe a couple of times a week, the staff got to know me, they remember my order and now know my name. The level on convo isn't particularly deep, "how was your weekend, what did you do etc etc" but I found it gave me a lot of confidence to communicate with others. Are there people at work or study you could ask to grab a coffee one day?

Also volunteering at my local op shop, again the people there are not normally the type of hang out with, they are a lot older! Haha, but it's been a truly life changing experience. Do you like animals? You could try volunteering at your local animal shelter, there you find like minded people and you'll have things in common 😃

As I've said in other posts, I really believe the universe is a magical thing and good things will come to you, you put good things out, good things will happen.

Again well done on reaching out, you'll find a lot of great advice on here! Keep your head up!

😃

[Wanderlust123]

Hi Amel1997,

I understand how you feel as I've had a similar experience. I left high school with no friends but had high hopes of making friends at uni and work. I realised making friends as an adult can be hard, talking to people is fine but making the jump to asking them to meet up for a movie/coffee etc is challenging. Plus social media doesn't help because it just makes us feel even more lonelier.

I've found 'Meet Up' to be a good way to find people who are looking to make friends, plus it gets you out of the house. Are you from SA? There are a couple of nice young female Meet Up groups which I am part of. Plus, I am sure there are similar Meet Ups interstate.

I hope this helps 🙂

[amel1997]

It’s so difficult. I just feel like there is something wrong with me. I’m from Tasmania!

I just signed up for Meet Up, what a cool idea. Doesn’t seem a whole lot of choice on here though 😞 That’s not unusual for Tassie though haha, but fingers crossed I find something 🙂

Thanks for you help x

[Wanderlust123]

I completely understand and I've had those moments of thinking something is wrong with me (I still sometimes do); but there is nothing wrong with you or me, it's completely okay. We need to stay positive and be kind to ourselves.

I hope you enjoy Meet Up, it's amazing how many other people are on it who are looking at meeting new people and making friends. I hope there is a social group on it in your area 😊

Let me know how you go!