People talk about being "me" again. I am not sure who I am without depression. Anyone else?

[MoMoPotato]

A lot of the posts/articles etc regarding being treated for depression and anxiety say that the person felt they were themselves again after medication or therapy; that they had recovered. I think I have been depressed and anxious since at least 13 years old, possible 10 years. It is difficult to say as I don't have a great number of memories from the earlier years, but i have felt depressed for as long as i can remember. Has anyone else experienced this, and what happened when you were treated? Is there another "me" inside?

[Beetle]

HI Mo

Well I found when my first depression was in remission I got my passion back for activities. I became more outgoing and could think clearer. Mu anti depressants worked within 3 days.

everyone is different and everyone responds differently to medication and therapy. there are so many variables. But I knew when I was ready to ditch the meds and the therapy. As long as you feel you need one or both you are not back to the true "me". That's what my expereinece is.

t the moment I see a therapist once a week and a psychiatrist and they have upped mu meds. SO my true "me" is buried under all that therapy and is probably suffocating.I cant wait to get my "me" back as depression and anxiety sux!

wish you all the best. Listen to your instincts. they should tell you when you are ready 🙂

xx

[therising]

Hi MoMoPotato

From my experience, the me that gradually entered into depression was very different from the me who came out. The change I experienced was intense, due to a couple of major life changing epiphanies within a depression group therapy session. BAMM, my brain suddenly changed; it kind of 'rewired' itself pretty dramatically over a period of days. Up until that point, I'd been living with depression for 15 years.

I believe, finding our true self is not so much about discovering who we are, it's more so about discovering who we are not. Considering a lot of our beliefs and ideas are taught to us, finding our true self happens when we no longer identify through other people's beliefs. Probably one of the most empowering beliefs I discovered for myself is 'I am not my depression'. Once I came to see this as the truth, things started taking a turn. Depression is a state the brain is in, as far as ingrained neural networks and chemistry go. Depression does not define a person, it simply defines the state of their brain. There is so much more to us than just the state of our brain MoMo.

Whether it be through effective medication or therapy, once we find ways to effectively change our mind (aka our brain at work), how we identify with the world changes. When we change the way we identify with the world, we find a new identity or a new 'me'.

My heart truly goes out to you as you struggle with the state of depression as well as your current identity. I wish deeply with all my heart and soul that you are able to find the 'you' which you long to meet. That 'you' is in there, waiting to be discovered.

Keep searching (with support and guidance) and take great care of yourself

[quirkywords]

MoMo,

Welocme to the forum. you can see by Bettle and the rising’s caring and supportive relies that this is a friendly and compassionate place.

You have asked such a thoughtful question that maybe everyone will answer in a different way.

I have struggled with who am I? For many years and even have a thread about being yourself,.

I have bipolar and when I started being stable I wondered if I was the gregarious risk taker or the inrtoverted sad thoughtful, person or a mixture or none. I found it so hard to work out who I was. Also,people judged me on who I had been in my extreme lows and highs so I felt I could never move on from others perceptions..

The rising mentioned learning who you are not, and that is helpful , but I did a lot of things in my moods that were not who I thought I was.

In the end, and I am still working on this, I am trying to accept that I am a flexible being and not just one static being. I believe while our core values tend to remain the same we do change over time.

i sometimes feel there is so much emphasis on finding the true me, the authentic self, that we may be missing the me that is with us all the time.

Quirky