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MoMoPotato People talk about being "me" again. I am not sure who I am without depression. Anyone else?
  • replies: 3

A lot of the posts/articles etc regarding being treated for depression and anxiety say that the person felt they were themselves again after medication or therapy; that they had recovered. I think I have been depressed and anxious since at least 13 y... View more

A lot of the posts/articles etc regarding being treated for depression and anxiety say that the person felt they were themselves again after medication or therapy; that they had recovered. I think I have been depressed and anxious since at least 13 years old, possible 10 years. It is difficult to say as I don't have a great number of memories from the earlier years, but i have felt depressed for as long as i can remember. Has anyone else experienced this, and what happened when you were treated? Is there another "me" inside?

Guest_1211 Feel like I have made a huge mistake.
  • replies: 1

Sorry this is super long!! So, I have been seeing a wonderful psychologist for the last 6 months. I had a termination (for many reasons, not really my choice) not long before I started seeing her. My GP thought I had reactive depression, but we now t... View more

Sorry this is super long!! So, I have been seeing a wonderful psychologist for the last 6 months. I had a termination (for many reasons, not really my choice) not long before I started seeing her. My GP thought I had reactive depression, but we now think it was just the thing that pushed me over the edge, and I couldn’t keep the mask up any more. It was not the main cause of my situation, I have felt awful for a very long time. After working with her almost weekly, I abruptly texted her yesterday and said I wanted to cancel my next appointment. Now I feel like I just cut my last lifeline. I felt like I was getting nowhere and felt worse. When I think back now, I still think in some ways I do feel worse, but maybe I’m just more aware now of how bad I’m actually feeling. Thinking over what we have worked through together I realise maybe that I have made some progress in that I have a lot more insight about why I feel like I do, or how I handle situations. I have had trouble agreeing with a lot of observations she makes because I have worked so hard to keep my emotions under control my whole life, or failed to acknowledge that some situations I’ve been in are pretty awful. This means I’ve found it really hard to open up and share much of myself. I have struggled when she uses the word ‘trauma’ or talks about some of the people that haven’t treated me well in a negative light. I have felt uncomfortable when she says nice things about me. I feel like a failure when I freeze up and can’t share anything, or get overwhelmed with emotions, which she identifies as dissociating. I feel ashamed when she talks about the termination. I feel like I fail to help myself every time I see her, like I’m not helping myself and I’m wasting everyone’s time. She also suggested medication to help with my incessant thoughts/worry and help me be able to access my emotions without being overwhelmed by them, and I am scared by that and feel it’s another failure. Other factors why I was so irrational yesterday: I had emailed her during the week and hadn’t had a response (which is perfectly reasonable, I know that), I had a terrible migraine (I have a lot of these), I stayed home from work and let people down by doing so, and it would have been my due date. So I know it wasn’t a rational time to make such a decision. I feel so stupid now, and I don’t know what to do to help myself.

Bluebirdbrown Asperger’s syndrome. Do I have it ? So picnicking
  • replies: 2

Hi, Hmmmm... it’s nothing special to talk about myself. I actually don’t really know what I want here. I just wandering around to browse the a syndrome called Asperger’s syndrome as I worry I have it. I googled and I seemed to tick most boxes. I am p... View more

Hi, Hmmmm... it’s nothing special to talk about myself. I actually don’t really know what I want here. I just wandering around to browse the a syndrome called Asperger’s syndrome as I worry I have it. I googled and I seemed to tick most boxes. I am panicking now. I have anxiety disorder for my entire life. Does anyone have an idea how to diagnose it and if any treatments available ? I normally have troubles of understanding people, I can’t read people’s minds, I don’t feel welcomed by any kind of conversations, I feel so lonely and horrible, I don’t like myself etc ... I feel so puzzled so I like to find out. Thanks.

Ash_Leigh Psychiatrist confidentiality from family to patient
  • replies: 4

Hello all, I have a query in regards to confidentiality from a psychiatrist but in the opposite way to what is usually asked about. My mother is very unwell (suicidal and addiction), she has been seeing this psychiatrist for many years and long story... View more

Hello all, I have a query in regards to confidentiality from a psychiatrist but in the opposite way to what is usually asked about. My mother is very unwell (suicidal and addiction), she has been seeing this psychiatrist for many years and long story short we are concerned about how everything is being handled. We have just written an email to the psychiatrist outlining our concerns and some very serious incidents that have occurring recently involving suicide attempts from my mother. My question is, is she able to tell my mother that we have contacted her and what the email contains? Because we are not patients of hers specifically does that mean she does not have the same confidentiality requirements? We attempted to make an in person appointment with her to discuss things (we are very aware she cannot discuss our mother with us, we just wanted to advise her of what has been going on), but she declined and so email was our only option. I hope this makes sense and my question comes across somewhat clearly. Thank you in advance for any help or responses

CeCe_02 Feeling blah
  • replies: 4

I have been on antidepressants for 3 or more years now and on the same one for most of this time. Up until recently they were really helping but I’m starting to feel really blah and almost numb about everything again and I feel very emotionless about... View more

I have been on antidepressants for 3 or more years now and on the same one for most of this time. Up until recently they were really helping but I’m starting to feel really blah and almost numb about everything again and I feel very emotionless about things that use to make me happy or upset. I’ve lost my mojo again. I am also finding it difficult to sleep at the moment (but I’m thinking that is because I’m starting a new job next week) im not really sure if I should think about trying a new antidepressant? I’m scared that it will take a while to find another one that works for me. Any advice? Thanks

el17 Antidepressants for anxiety
  • replies: 5

I’ve been struggling with anxiety for a few years now and have wanted to try every avenue I could to try and get better without the use of antidepressants. I feel as if I haven’t gotten any better. I’ve tried exercise, eating healthy and self help bo... View more

I’ve been struggling with anxiety for a few years now and have wanted to try every avenue I could to try and get better without the use of antidepressants. I feel as if I haven’t gotten any better. I’ve tried exercise, eating healthy and self help books. I was okay for a bit but I have gone back to square one. Who has taken antidepressants for anxiety and what do they feel whilst on them? I’m tossing up the options currently and want to make sure the decision is right. I know everyone reacts different to them. What are everyone’s thoughts?

Mattie_B Scared of medication
  • replies: 10

Hi, Newbie here. I have recently had a mental break, that was triggered by severe insomnia for about 4 weeks. My mind wouldn't stop racing and I was unable to function during the days, not able to work, crying all the time and a downright mess. I hav... View more

Hi, Newbie here. I have recently had a mental break, that was triggered by severe insomnia for about 4 weeks. My mind wouldn't stop racing and I was unable to function during the days, not able to work, crying all the time and a downright mess. I have had a history with GAD since 2004 and was able to overcome it with natural therapies specifically acupuncture. Fueled due to my severe fear of antidepressants and my research of them. My recent breakdown I couldn't use any natural remedies, acupuncture was not working nor meditation. Being so crippled I decided to see my GP for sleeping aids, just to try get past the first few weeks of insomnia. But taking the medication and not sleeping well triggered my GAD to resurface, also with the added effects of depression I ended up being curled up in a ball just crying and not able to use logical thinking to calm myself. I went back to my GP and told them how much of a Mess I was. I have young kids 5,3, and 7 month old and a beautiful wife. Our family home is great, I have a good job although stressful of late, I had at the time been unable to pin point the triggered for me to regress so badly. My GP prescribed me medication. Under ANY other circumstance for example if my doctor prescribed me medicine to heal a festering wound which could lead to infection I wouldn't hesitate or even think twice about taking the medication. BUT for this... my fear of the drugs is high. I have pushed through that barrier using logic, but I am still unable to accept the medication and be calm about taking them. My side effects have been nothing really. But my anxiety is still crippling me at the moment and I fear the drugs are not treating it properly. I have now been on them for 4 weeks. I have been told to stick it out for 2 more weeks. I am also using medication to combat nights of sleeplessness. Which I also have fears of using. Not matter what logic I try to apply I am always fearful of these medications, and struggling in accepting them. I have just started to see a Pshyc, have had experience before, am trying to implement CBT of what i remember. I have created a Mantra for myself that I use daily to try re-program my through behavior. I am not a patient person, and I recognize I need time to right the right medication that will help me the most. But I struggle with accepting the use of medication. The fear is constantly there. Anyone else have this experience?

Lucy7 Feelings/Obsessive thoughts about my psychologist
  • replies: 6

Hi all, I have been seeing my psychologist for 2 years now and for the most part the sessions are helpful and rewarding. I mostly feel listened to and respected and she is certainly the best "fit" that i have experienced. The problem is that i am tot... View more

Hi all, I have been seeing my psychologist for 2 years now and for the most part the sessions are helpful and rewarding. I mostly feel listened to and respected and she is certainly the best "fit" that i have experienced. The problem is that i am totally obsessed with her. Not romantically or sexually, but i cannot get her out of my head, i think about her constantly, i have found her and her husband on facebook and can spend hours looking at photos of her and her life, sometimes i co-ordinate my day so that i will be passing her office as she arrives just to catch a glance at her... Wow! When i write this out it seems terrible! Her presence calms me and i am more obsessive when i am feeling low or going through a rough patch... i feel that it is impacting the relationship as i am self conscious about it then when i see her (she doesn't know) and i cannot communicate clearly about my thoughts. I have done lots of reading about transference and i am sure my feelings are 'normal' but sometimes the intensity of the obsession scares me slightly... Once i saw her pull out of her office car park and considered following her to see where she lives?! i am terrified to talk to her about this as i am afraid of loosing the relationship as she has been so helpful to me on my journey to recovery. Any advice, tips or shared experiences would be appreciated.

Tweet-Heart Nothing is going my way no options left
  • replies: 15

I am 38 single and still live at home and completely trapped with no-way out. A brief background 3 years ago I suffered horrendous bullying including being stalked and unwanted physical contact. I ended up going into hospital for the first time ever ... View more

I am 38 single and still live at home and completely trapped with no-way out. A brief background 3 years ago I suffered horrendous bullying including being stalked and unwanted physical contact. I ended up going into hospital for the first time ever for seven weeks diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and have had three other acute inpatient admissions, twice in 2016, including in emergency and . I also had other issues at the time including my grandmother having a stroke and my aunty who has since died being diagnosed with terminal cancer. I reported the stalking to the police in 2015 and 2016. I need to find a place of my own but can't afford it. Last year I had to go into hiding for a few weeks due to emotional abuse and threatening behavior but was exited as I a single and they told me they are only extending women with children. I have been handballed and referred to various housing agencies who keep telling me because I am single they can't help me find somewhere secure to live. I can't go into private rental or a rooming house as they are not suitable options due to my mental health. I am not eligible for public or social housing and if I was the waiting list is too long. I have tried everything and am struggling and don't even feel like getting out of bed. I am going to be trapped in this abusive home environment for the rest of my life as I can't find safe, long term affordable housing. I feel like a loser with no sense of identity or purpose. I cannot work, study or function due to my condition. I have engaged lawyers to pursue an income protection and tpd claim but not confident I will get either.

bigstar Just a message for those who are scared of medication.
  • replies: 3

5 months ago I tried to admit myself to hospital after not sleeping for 13 days and I was psychotically depressed. I went in there begging them to just make me unconscious. Of course they didn't. They sent me to my GP and I had no choice but to try m... View more

5 months ago I tried to admit myself to hospital after not sleeping for 13 days and I was psychotically depressed. I went in there begging them to just make me unconscious. Of course they didn't. They sent me to my GP and I had no choice but to try medication. After thirty years of dealing with this sickness--I finally got on the meds. I just recently returned from travelling Europe on my own, I'm back at work, I finally have my self back again after a year of crippling anxiety and 5 months of the most crazy hopeless depression. It's a weird and precipitous turn around and I still have my bad days but I am basically back to my old self again. Wait, I'm better now! I could never even get on planes or travel I was that anxious all the time. And look at me go now. I know there are a lot of people out there who are still thinking about meds and I just hope this might inspire you to do it if you like the sickness is insurmountable. Don't feel like you're giving in. You don't have to do this on your own. I wish you all way more than luck. X

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