My dad has cancer

Guest_46773898

Hi all,

Last night, I learnt that my dad has been diagnosed with pretty bad cancer. My parents are in overseas (where I originally come from). I'm in my late 40s and my parents are in late 70s so it's a pretty good run I think but I have been panicking for the last 24 hours. I spent hours online looking for something and I really didn't remember anything. I'm more overwhelmed and panicked than the sadness for now. My mum and sis and her husband will talk to a doc on Wed so we will know exactly how bad it is and planning. My sis said not to think about it until then but obviously I can't stop thinking about it. I haven't told my partner about this yet as he started his new job today (and lost his dad last year). My mum also said wait until Wednesday. I don't really know what to do or even how I'm supposed to feel. I don't know if any support group out there for someone like myself. As (very luckily) this is my first time to face something like this so have no information on me. Dad may be old but the diagnosis was very sudden and surprise as he was just fine a day before he started to feel pain. As I suffer a mild anxiety, the anxiety level is really high now. I'm extremely tired but don't feel like I cannot sleep tonight again.
Thank you for reading.

Doors24

Hello,

Unfortunately I have had some experience in this. And while it isn’t allowed to give numbers or links on this forum for regular members, can I recommend contacting the Cancer Council Australia on their telephone hotline. And someone there will be able to talk to you and understand exactly how you are feeling.

It is also human and understandable to be feeling exactly as you are. Not knowing all the facts or what it means for the future can be such an anxiety provoking experience. It may not seem helpful, but some exercise to get out some nervous energy and help you sleep could be helpful. And please try to eat, even if you don’t feel like it.

Here to listen and support you if you need it,

Doors24

Sophie_M

Hi Guest_46773898,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for your bravery and openness in sharing here. It’s a really good place to have come to hear from others who understand what you’re going through. We can hear how difficult it has been lately, we’re so sorry that’s been going on.

Our community will be able to relate to a lot of what you’ve been going through and be able to share some of the methods that have helped them or people who have been through something similar.

Thanks again for sharing. We’re here to listen and offer support, and you never know how your story might help someone else.
Kind regards,
Mod Support

Psychdiaries2

Hi there,

Welcome to the forums, thank you for reaching out to this community.

I am sorry to hear what you’re going through today. I can only imagine how scary and anxiety-provoking this situation must be. I think that researching things online will probably only cause more anxiety. I would suggest to stop looking online and just listen to what the doctor has to say.

Continue to talk to your family about this, you’re all going through the same thing so hopefully you can lean on each other for support. It’s ok to feel anxious right now, it is normal given the circumstances. However, if things get a little too much for you and you would like to speak to a counsellor, you can either call one or speak through the webchat service here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/talk-to-a-counsellor

Maybe you could try some meditation before bed to hopefully make you feel tired? I understand it’s hard worrying about what is going to happen in the future, but perhaps you could try some deep breathing to return your focus on the present moment.

I hope this helps. You are more than welcome to keep reaching out here on the forums too, we are here for you. You don’t have to go through this alone. Take care of yourself today ❤️