I suffered PTSD from an assault I experienced a year ago.
Once I started to feel better and go back to normal, my partner's feelings about the situations began to turn. He questioned me for not coming to him earlier about the event and saw this as a breach of trust. I understand completely where he comes from but I feel as though he can not, and will not ever be able to understand the emotional damage the event caused me.
Over he past few months his mood has changed as he becomes depressed and unmotivated in every aspect of his life. He has hardly initiated sex or said that he loves me. He will have really high highs then he will spiral out of control over something small. He will default to being rude to me and take out everything on me. Sometimes when we are together everything will be fine and then I go to work and he will text me saying how sad he is and that he doesn't think he right in the head. He has messaged suicidal intentions and sometimes will not reply to anyone, scaring us all. He has always suffered from depression and anxiety and it something we have always talked about. When we first started going out he mentioned how his last GF had left him due to his 'dark' times and he could never forgive her.
He refuses to speak to anyone, when he has never even tried one. I am here for him 100% through all this but the way he treats me when he hits the down periods is really starting to effect me. I feel as though I can't leave him, he gets jealous of my friends, he will message me very scary messages as soon as he has left me. I am now developing anxiety as I'm scared of what he will do when he is not with me. He's pushed all his friends away and relies on me heavily. Just today he has gone from having a lovely morning to rock bottom, texting me while I'm work, a complete mess.
I love him so much but this is not healthy for my own mental state as well as his. I am only 25 years old and having recently gone through an assault and trauma want nothing more than a happy life which I have worked hard for in the last few months.
I feel lost and stuck and don't know what else I can do to offer support to the one I love who is also now struggling.
