Tonight my partner admitted to me that he has major depression. He has been medicated before, but won't go on medication again as it made him feel "numb". He has also seen psychologists but said it doesn't help.
He says no matter what he is doing, at any point in the day, there is always something there bothering him. Keeping busy helps keep it at bay, but it has gotten to the point where he is burning himself out keeping so busy. He is up til 2 or 3am every night catching up on work or writing songs. Then he works 9am til 5pm, comes home, sleeps for 2 hours or so and stays up late again.
He has days where he won't even talk to me. At all. He calls these his "moods". He will look at me when I speak to him, and either grunt or look away and play with his phone (which I think is another of his "keeping busy" tactics, though it is becoming a problem as he is on it for around 4 hours a day, and will ignore me in favor of it)
He recently admitted to me that when he was young he did a small stint in jail (6 months I believe), and while there, he was beaten and raped more than once.
He also has tourettes, which, from what I have read, can also be physically draining (he can't sit still for longer than about 30 seconds. His tics are moving his arms, fingers, eyes, mouth, stomach muscles, waving one arm, and the occasional sound, but mostly muscular) He is also unmedicated for this, and it is getting progressively worse.
2 years ago he also had brain cancer, but thankfully cancer free now)
I am struggling with how to help him. He has been through so much and almost refuses to talk about it. He will just curl up in bed and stare at the walls. I offer help, but he says he has tried everything and this is just "who he is". I offered to listen but he won't talk about it much. He is like this for most of the week, and it is taking it's toll on me and our relationship. He "hid" it from me for quite a while, but as his life became more stressful, he was unable to hide it anymore.
Please help! What can I do?
