Hi,
I have read many posts on helping loved ones with depression and have found so many of these to be very helpful. It has also eased my mind, as I can relate so much to these situations. I love and support my partner and believe he has been battling depression for a lot of his life. I have only known him for 12 months and have been dating him for 8 months. During this time I have been able to see all sides of him, from the most loving, selfless and caring person I have met to withdrawn, judgemental and selfish. It has been a rollercoaster, but being aware has made me more mindful on how to react in certain situations. I know during times of stress, he starts to withdraw from me and his mood becomes dark, which only lasts a couple of days. It hasn't been easy and I know the criticism and judgement are not personal attacks, but unfortunately being human makes me susceptible to this at times. He has on a couple of occasions indicated he needs to seek help and I told him I would always be there to support him when he decided to make this step. I have never pressured, nor would I, as I know this is only a decision he can make on his own and when he is ready.
In the last month he was made redundant over an incident that occurred at work, that was in no way his fault. Unfortunately this hit him hard, which was to be expected, as he felt responsible for letting everyone down. I have been there to support him the whole way through it, as much as I can. Unfortunately, as we both work in FIFO and live in different parts of the state, once I had to return to work, he started to slowly shut me out. Messages were 2 word replies and then there was no contact for 5 days. I finally made contact and discovered he was in a worse situation than I had thought possible. He didn't want to talk much about it and I didn't want to pressure him. Now it has been close to another week with no contact. I have sent occasional messages offering my support and letting him know how much I care and will not give up on him. I try calling every couple of days, as I don't want him to feel suffocated, but also don't want him thinking I have given up on him. I have no one to contact to find out if he is ok. Do I just need to be patient and give him his space and respect he wants no contact or is there more I could do? It has been tough not knowing. I have another 2 weeks of working away and don't know if I will hear from him before then to arrange to see him. I feel so helpless.
