- Beyond Blue Forums
- Caring for myself and others
- Supporting family and friends
- Bi-polar infidelity?? is this a real thing or just...
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Mark Topic as New
- Mark Topic as Read
- Pin this Topic for Current User
- Follow
- Printer Friendly Page
Bi-polar infidelity?? is this a real thing or just the person?
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hi again SW
Im 60yo and was correctly diagnosed with bp2 in 2009. Hence like others here I spent most of my life with the illness undiagnosed.
As a young man I was, I believe, hypersexual (where's the yardstick?)...but I was Also...very impulsive...no extremely so, subsequently I bought and sold cars regardless of the financial ramifications. I was moody, emotional, depressive episodes and anxious.
However I was lucky, I had a responsible side, punctual, subordinate, energetic, hard worker and caring.
Its when a person doesn't have these good qualities they can get into trouble...criminal trouble.
So there can be a balance but often the weight of the illness overshadows the good side and we can't fully control ourselves. My behaviour used to be quite confrontational on one side and a sad sack the other, two extremes like the happy and sad clown masks.
As pointed our by our champion Kaz, where would we be without treatment?. With treatment our behaviour is within tolerable margins most times with the regular hiccup out of sorts behaviour.
I hope you get him the treatment he needs.
Also google Topic: depression, is there any positive?- beyondblue
To look at the bright side.
Tony WK
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hi everyone, firstly I cannot thank you all enough for your comments, guidance, and experiences.
I am still coming to terms with everything I have recently found out. One thing I am not coping with is the lack of remorse my partner is showing, I know he knows how much he has hurt me, but unfortunately because of his bipolar, he is almost incapable of showing any real emotional support, or any type of reasoning. I have no idea what I'm going to do from here on, but I can't thank you all enough, your comments have shown a light I needed! TY!
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hello Skye, thanks for getting back to us and I'm please we've been able to shed a little light on the situation for you.
I'm not defending your husband, and he might well take the diagnosis very differently to me. But in my case, getting the diagnosis was an immense thing to deal with. I was diagnosed early this year, after many years of being treated for depression and after a long struggle with alcoholism (we are prone to self-medicaton with booze or drugs or sex - anything to help us find oblivion or indulge the mania).
While I was in some ways glad to have a diagnosis and start treatment, it also made me reassess so many things about my life. Things I had never understood suddenly fell into place - all of them bad. I resented going through so much, putting my family through so much when, if I'd been diagnosed earlier they might not have happened. And, I also had to accept that this was for life. I would always be this way.
It's both a relief and a regret to learn that so that so many things you thought about yourself and about other people, the grand ideas, the certainty that you were right and others wrong, the arguments, the obsessiveness ... were because of an illness ... all my life, and I find out at 53!
So, for me at least, my first responses were all about poor me. But once I got my head around it, the remorse and the regret came. Oh did it come. And it hasn't gone either. I'm learning to handle it, but I know it will probably always be there to a certain extent.
What I'm saying is that it's early days for your husband. Everyone reacts differently of course, but it could be he has a lot to take in and think about, and certainly the infidelity is part of that. But if he's like me, he could well be thinking through a whole lot of stuff right now. It's almost like suddenly finding out you're not the person you thought you were.
Of course you must still make your own way through this, and take care of you. You have to think through what's most important to YOU. But again I'd say if you can, give it time. Learn everything you can about the disorder. Talk to him, ask him to be honest about what's going on in his head. And know that treatment takes time to kick in - he needs to patient with that too. It can be months.
I feel for you Skye. For both of you. Please know you can come here anytime you want to chat. we're here for you.
Kaz
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Infidelity is real
- « Previous
-
- 1
- 2
- Next »