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Needing support
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Hi I'm new here and not sure where to start. I've been struggling with my mental health recently especially my anxiety. I battle with suicidal ideation and self harming. There's alot going on in my life and despite trying to get support to deal with things I'm left alone with no help. Anyway I'm hoping to get some support here and maybe learn some new ways of coping.
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Dear Hopeiskey~
Welcome to the Forum, where we hope your life will turn around as mine has and you find what you need. Life can be much better than the one you are leading now.
I have an anxiety conditon amongst other things and too think of taking my life - which can be frightening when I think of how close I come. There are several things that help me.
One was I had an understanding partner who tries to make things better for me. She did not always succeed however her constant love is a comfort. Actually it was something that normally made me pause, thinking of her distress if I died, however sadly other-times I felt she might be better off without me (she was horrified when I told her later on)
I hope there is someone in your life to support you, if not you can find understanding here. It's not the same as dialing 000 in a crisis, but you get a more personal response, even if a lot slower
The second thing that helped was clinical support, with medication and therapy (and in my case hospitalization). After trying a fair number of medications I finally found one that does the job wihtout side-effects - amazing!
Thirdly I have a safety-plan. There is a free download to your phone from Lifeline and it is called Beyond Now. When I feel overwhelmed my mind is full of hopeless thoughts and I really have no room left to make decisions. In this app is a section 'Things I Can Do For myself', and I find it the most useful by far.
It is something you prepare in advance (and keep on modifying). It is a list of things that in the past you have found distracting or enjoyable. These can be very hard to remember so if you can get the help of someone that knows you they might be able to remind you what you liked.
As I said I can't make decisions when I'm in that state so the list has to be exact. No uses saying 'listen to music', I need to be exact "Back to Black" by Amy Winehouse might be a start, then somethng you know from Tom Waites, and so on. I have songs, videos, books, and activities like going outside for a walk to a coffee shop. The is no limit to what you can put down. As one tihng loses it's effect you substitute another for next time.
I hope some of this is useful to you, please do come back if you would like
Croix
As this seems the most urgent of your problems I'll just talk about that so as not to overload you.
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Thankyou for your reply.
I don't have anyone to support me, no friends or family.
It's a very scary place to be in even more so when I've been down that path before. So i know all to well that things can get real very fast for me.
I've tried to make safety plans previously but the only thing that's on it is me reaching out for support when I feel things getting too much or i feel like acting on my thoughts. I don't find joy in anything and I struggle to think of things I used to enjoy doing.
I've tried getting support. I was under the care of a mental health team a few years ago but it didn't help and i made several suicide attempts. I spent time in hospital but was ignored and put into the top hard basket. I saw a psychologist who told me that I was a lost cause. So I don't have any professional supports other than my gp.
I use distractions every day just to try to make it through. But in that moment when the thoughts become too much no amount of distraction helps. I can act without realising what I've done until it's too late.
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Dear Hopeiskey~
Trying to find things that will steer you away from drastic action is hard, I did mention some of mine, which might seem lightweight, and i guess for you they are.
As my body became more limited due ot a spinal-condition I could no longer take that walk to a coffee shop. It's a pity becuse exercise and change of environment can both be at least partially effective
I agree trying to think of things you may have enjoyed is just about impossible when you are down, and even when not as bad it can take someone else to remind you. Then again they may not work.
I do believe physical activity helps, and now I have substituted singing, wich can be a challenge, uses a lot of exertion and also help the mind switch streams. No, I realise it is not for everyone, however it may be worth a try.
I started gently singing 'The Windmills of your mind" which with its lyrics
'Round like a circle in a spiral, like a wheel within a wheel
Never ending or beginning on an ...."
It seemd to mach the useless way my mind was behaving but became too gentle, I needed something that strained the chest and vocal chords. I went on to Edwin War's "War" and since then have found many more. Classical (shock horror) can present a challenge
This might seem unconventional, and I'm sure my taste is not yours, however pick something out (get the lyrics on line) and try it out, you never know.
Croix (who does not have one speck of music in him nowadays and his singing reflects that:(
