Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Lost, my life so far is aimless

replies: 3

I've been struggling with depression ever since highschool and I've only recently been seeing my psychologist for help. The idea of life and living has always sounded stressful to me, so i never really knew what i wanted to be or do with my life other than kill myself at a young age. I confessed to my parents one day about how im not sure where my life is heading and not exactly sure what to do, I've only just recently turned 18 and was expecting guidance or reassurance, instead i get told off about how they would send me back to my country if i did nothing or didn't know what to do with my life, since then the thought of killing myself and harming myself only really increased. The next time i see my psychologist is next week and im willing to ask for help, other than that im not really sure what to do, as of right now.

Heavy Heart...

replies: 2

Last week I had a very scary experience with my son who started screaming at myself and my daughter. He thought we were arguing and was triggered. He had a driving lesson this week that didn't go well and again had a screaming fit. Poor kid was an innocent bystander to watching his big sister go through severe bullying through senior school. His own needs as a child growing up were second to myself and his mum having to devote most of our attention to his sister to survive. It was awful and I knowing what I know now would have pulled her out of the education system that is clearly broken. Their lack of support and action supports perpetrators and not victims. No accountability for parents and consequences for the kids. Anyhow, they have damaged both of my kids as a result. Time doesn't heal wounds. My own innocent kids had to deal with changing schools 3 times, restraining orders on 12, 13 year old girls for what? Because their own negligent parents didn't have the decency to rain in their own kids behaviour when they were being awful to a young girl for no reason. Very sad! As a father who is struggling to navigate his own life it is not easy. My son is lost. I can see it in his eyes. He has so much rage and anger I am genuinely concerned about what may happen. He is a ticking time bomb. Selfishly as an adult I now regret having children knowing I don't have the mental fortitude to help them navigate all the unnecessary BS that life these days is delivering. I am exhausted from constantly feeling grief and sadness in all areas of life. Thanks for listening. x

Disability and inequity

replies: 2

I had an accident a few weeks ago and ended with significant injuries. I have not being back at work since. I have a conference coming up on Friday and was attending with a work colleague. The conference is in regard to a position we both work in. I am ok to go to conference and can use disability provisions to ensure attendance at conference. My colleague is now telling me I can't attend due to my injuries. I feel that my colleague is using my situation to advance themselves. My mind is sound and I see no reason to miss the convention. Of course now, I'm feeling very low, useless, invisible, and perhaps that I am a threat to the colleague. Thoughts, as I'm not feeling great at this point.

Disclosing/limited disclosure to Psychiatrist suicidal intent

replies: 1

I am seeing my psychiatrist. can I tell them that I am suicidal and that I am unable to disclose with them details about it? What is their legal obligations if I refuse to provide more information about it? Will they have to act on it ie send me to hospital? I don’t want hospital of any kind. Or is it better to shut up and not mention it at all or just say “it’s fine” when it’s damn well not “fine”

No one actually cares

replies: 2

I’m on medicationi see a psychiatrist i just called lifeline and if many things I explained how one of the things that messes with me is that after an hour with the psychiatrist your “time is up” Thought it was going well but then after half an hour she said it’s “time to end the call” guess I’m not suicidal enough i don’t want to die i wNt to live for my kids i was cheated on 6 years ago and left for another man no abuse, nothing sinister. I am a good man. But since then I have struggled with both anxiety and depression on pills prescribed by the doc and I’m seeing a psychiatrist as already said but it doesn’t change anything i feel pain everyday my day is wake upfeel painworkfeel painwork more because child support doesn’t care and I’m paying a huge amount more than I shouldhave kids - because I have them 50%and then I feel like a beerand one always turns into manynow I’m an alcoholic that is seeking support for that A more money I have my kids literally 50% but I still pay $340 a week child support On top of that - i pay all of their sports, my eldest (I have 3) doeshigh end sport so that alone is >$5k a year, plus her other one and then the second girl does 3 things and the you youngest boy does a couple things (trying not to be too specific just in case) no one cares as long as mum is ok, everyone is ok. and then my eldest says “mum can’t afford our lunch orders this week” on a Friday it is about $10 each for a Lunch order. Meanwhile she just got new sunglasses worth $300. Tattoos, you name or.the system doesn’t care i always try to do the right thing “mum must just be going through a hard time” but she does cash on the side plus Centrelink payments, plus she is still with the aforementioned man who has his own income. She was supposed to keep them on private health but then when the first big op came up no, we had to spend double (which I pay half) because she had taken them off without my knowledge because she “couldn’t afford it” In the meantime she had a tummy tuck and god knows what else because she wanted to look better. the system doesn’t care about the kids and definitely not the person who makes money, they just feed the person who makes the least. Great job Australia. im just about done with it all the only thing holding me here is my 3 amazing children who are innocent and I would never let know this drama. guess the only reason I’m here is god I hope someone has had the same experience and made it through and can me some guidance. there isn’t any more ‘medical’ prescribed things I can be doing.

My son beat me. And then bit me.

replies: 3

Everyday. I cannot see any purpose for me in my life. I am a punchbag, bite-sponge, and a scratchmat. My blood is of no value. I wake up and care for him all day, cooking for him, feeding him, taking him for drives, cleaning him, cuddling him. Then he sits on me and watches ipad. And then he beats me, bites me, scratches me. He has severe autism, now 17. I am Male age 50. I can't take it anymore. Why do I even wake up ? To repeat the same all over again ?

Downward spiral

replies: 2

I need to know if anyone has felt this and that im not just attention seeking but i just want someone to really truly care. Ive self harmed for a few years on and off but only in the past year or two has it gotten "bad", I've never made an attempt on my life but i think about it im honestly just to scared to but i often think maybe if i try and fail someone will care about me, or if i self harm enough to land me in the hospital so people finally notice that its not a fun hobby i do sometimes its something activly affecting my life. sometimes i think its not bad enough to go to the hospital for and it sounds awful and i know that but what if i exaggerated it and said "oh yeah ive tried to actually do it but it didnt work so here i am" i know thats a lie but they dont. anyway not to ramble or anything but i really just want something to happen so someone will notice and care for me.

Needing support

replies: 3

Hi I'm new here and not sure where to start. I've been struggling with my mental health recently especially my anxiety. I battle with suicidal ideation and self harming. There's alot going on in my life and despite trying to get support to deal with ... View more

Emptiness taints everything

replies: 8

My external life looks great- friends, family, meaningful employment (albeit more difficult recently), sense of community, financial and housing security. But, life feels too big and too small at the same time. I feel like an empty shell, a person who is made up of a gaping pit of nothing, void. I feel vague, like I am a step behind myself, disconnected and the world is foggy. I’ve had suicidal thoughts on/off for 12 years now, with past attempts. I thought I had recovered and I had 3 years of stability but recently the thoughts returned with a vengeance. The thoughts are protective, they distract me from the emptiness inside but in the end their protection leads to destruction. The thoughts come with the need to act in some form- research - plan- preparation: purchase and hoarding of materials- rehearsal of plan- etc. Unfortunately, the actions tend to escalate over time. Lately, I’m not allowed to go to bed without the house clean and all rubbish in the bin outside and clothes washed, just in-case I am not around in the morning. I don’t want my family having to wash my clothes or see the last food I have eaten. This is the stupid level of detail my brain makes me obsess over, and it becomes exhausting. Even when I have a good day and the thoughts are in the background, they come to the foreground at night, in the end the rules must be followed. I have engaged in therapy continuously for 4 years, and on/off for a total of 10 years- including group therapy programs. I’ve had two therapy appointments already this week because I wasn’t sure how I would survive to the next week- thankfully I think I will be relatively safe until my next appointment. The GP wants me to see a psychiatrist, but I really don’t think my issue is neurochemical so I don’t hold much hope that psychiatry will be able to assist. The suicidal thoughts are just a well worn neural pathway, they’ve become an impossible habit to break and I fear they are chronic. Am I the only one who creates a life worth living and yet still finds it impossible to live in it?

When power is concentrated in the hands of the few, the actions of the many don't matter.

replies: 3

When I look at the world I see a terrible place that is getting worse. In particular, I have noticed that what power I do have to make positive change is being bulldozed by those who benefit from the world staying the same or getting worse. I am watching the planet slowly but surely breeze past climate targets to ensure the life is permanently going to be harder and worse. I see genocides happening whilst my government worries about appearing to be too biased against those with power. And what is worst of all, I see people who actively want to make the world a place hostile towards people because it makes their own lives slightly easier. It is tiring to see nothing but bad things happening and knowing I cannot do anything to change it. What is more frustrating is that no-one seems to understand my anger towards this matter. When I describe my feelings of being upset at seeing my world turn into a cesspit, people tell me to focus on the small things. I hear people say "worry about yourself", or "small changes add up" or other nonsense that does absolutely nothing to change the status quo. For every meaningful thing I do, there is another person undermining my actions because they don't want to give up anything to make the world better. I hate being on this planet. Seeing the backwardness. Being told to ignore what I cannot change, even though these things still affect me. I'm tired of knowing that no matter how much I try to make the world better, I will never be able to actually change anything. I don't want to have pain anymore. I don't want to have to deal with being powerless anymore. This world is hostile to me. There are 8 billion people with over 25 million dying everyday. 1,000 people might even know if I die. Less would care. Last year, I accidentally bought a case of ammo. Too bad I only need 1.

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Lost, my life so far is aimless replies: 3

Heavy Heart... replies: 2

Disability and inequity replies: 2

Disclosing/limited disclosure to Psychiatrist suicidal intent replies: 1

No one actually cares replies: 2

My son beat me. And then bit me. replies: 3

Downward spiral replies: 2

Needing support replies: 3

Emptiness taints everything replies: 8

When power is concentrated in the hands of the few, the actions of the many don't matter. replies: 3