Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 92

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Racingmind123 Self harm & suicidal thoughts returned
  • replies: 4

Hi lovely people, not too sure where to start, though I have been on here once before due to my narcissistic ex bf who took me down the path of me almost ending my life. I wouldn’t be here today if I didn’t have my dog. After the last disaster in my ... View more

Hi lovely people, not too sure where to start, though I have been on here once before due to my narcissistic ex bf who took me down the path of me almost ending my life. I wouldn’t be here today if I didn’t have my dog. After the last disaster in my life, I was suicidal for a year.... met no guys for almost two years and after a lot of time and self healing, I started to date again. After a lot of duds, I started dating a guy I originally met many years ago... everything was great and we became official and I thought he was going to be one of the ‘nice guys’.... I even said to my mum that I could see myself marrying him... how wrong I was... only as of two nights ago, i walked in on him with another girl... I never in a million years thought he could or would do that to me... it took me so long to finally open up to someone again and my trust has been completely shattered. I noticed some red flags and sadly I was right. For me, it was a tidal wave of emotions that flooded back from all my ex’s and past trauma... sadness, anger, betrayal, embarrassment as I had told my friends how great he was... I’m shattered beyond words... I’m soon to be 36 and I was looking for a husband... time is ticking away fast and the thought of starting over AGAIN for the millionth time is almost unbearable. I am glad I found out now and not further down the track, but it’s shattered me. I self harmed for the first time in a really long time and suicidal thoughts are coming in again thick and fast... I thought I had become strong, but yesterday proved otherwise. I had to call lifeline after a breakdown and I walked myself down to the police station to save me from myself. I don’t want to stay single, but I don’t know if I can go through this ever again. All I’ve ever wanted is someone to love me as much as I do them and I continue to get used and played. I have boundaries and I’ve learnt a lot from my experiences and I speak up sooner when the energy shifts, but I still can’t believe this keeps happening. I just can’t cope with the betrayal and hurt anymore...

KaiyaE How to ask for help
  • replies: 2

I've been doing somewhat ok this year. I finally remembered what it was like to feel somewhat happy. But this week I feel myself going down a spiral, and I can't get myself out of it. I'm getting into the habit of self-harming whenever I'm upset .. a... View more

I've been doing somewhat ok this year. I finally remembered what it was like to feel somewhat happy. But this week I feel myself going down a spiral, and I can't get myself out of it. I'm getting into the habit of self-harming whenever I'm upset .. again. After 8 months of being clean. It's like my brain won't turn off, and I don't know what to do. Whenever I'm upset, suicide is the first thing that comes to mind, and it's never just a thought. It always escalates. I'm honestly scared about what I might do to myself. I just want my brain too turn off.I have a teacher at school that I trust, but I don't know how to bring this up to her. I don't want to put any extra pressure on her, her job is hard enough as it is. I mean... She has to deal with the year 10 boys, that's painful.So I guess, what I'm trying to say is how do I start that conversation? Because I have no clue.

Rupes79 Living only for others
  • replies: 7

I spend most days thinking about ending my life. It provides some comfort knowing I can end the perpetual cycle of pain and negative thoughts when I need to. The only thing that stops me is the pain for those I leave behind and for that I find myself... View more

I spend most days thinking about ending my life. It provides some comfort knowing I can end the perpetual cycle of pain and negative thoughts when I need to. The only thing that stops me is the pain for those I leave behind and for that I find myself resenting them. I find myself living only for others and I don’t want that. I want to sever ties and end it on my terms.

Skippy_07 Just need to vent in a safe place.
  • replies: 40

Hello, Why does this fight feel like it’s a battle that can’t be won, I’m tired, I’m not sleeping well at night, guess I just want to share as text as I find it hard talking by voice physically or virtually This nightly nausea (that fuzzy uncomfortab... View more

Hello, Why does this fight feel like it’s a battle that can’t be won, I’m tired, I’m not sleeping well at night, guess I just want to share as text as I find it hard talking by voice physically or virtually This nightly nausea (that fuzzy uncomfortable feeling you get seconds before vomiting but for hours) I have had since I was a kid and been stupid I use to hide it from my parents until my late teens and even now they only know about it when it’s really bad. then sensory issues on top where the sound of people eating, coughing, yawning, sneezing or heavy breathing makes me so uncomfortable and agitated, even after that sound is over I can still hear it as clear as if it was still happening for a range of time after making me even more agitated I seen my GP (he kept making a sucking sound between each sentence I wanted to say something but was to scared, by the end of the appt I was extremely edgy) yesterday to explain I’m starting to feel scared Im going to lash out as I have already started snapping back with no control it happens so fast I don’t get the chance even stop my self from doing it by mimicking the sound but in a really aggressive tone. The GP recommended me a few things like breathing exercises, grounding and even using a rubber band to snap on my wrist I know it’s not been long but the rubber band snapping sort of helps me but I find my self getting really snap happy if the feeling is bad then it stings for awhile after I struggle to focus on things I want to enjoy or did enjoy like programming, drawing I just lose focus within a few seconds to a minute even if I really want todo it then I get really agitated and upset at myself People say if you are unsafe to go to a hospital but my last experience was traumatic I know what I heard, a nurse saying I wasting there resources and if I was going to do it I would just do it, but now I’m questioning if that was a delusion from not sleeping in over 48 hours and that’s making me question if I’m attention seeking even though I hesitate to tell anyone how I feel, hospital investigated the complaint my GP lodged and they ended up apologising for how I was treated but even with that I don’t think I could ever go to one again even for a physical emergency, eg I was choking 2 weeks ago I forced my self to clear it my self was really scary but I’d choose that option over asking for help. I try to plan my words and actions carefully to avoid a hospital visit at all costs now thanks for reading my vent

Tickles88 Lost new mum
  • replies: 4

My doctor is always asking if i have suicidal thoughts.. obviously i do. Or she wouldnt ask.. why is it so hard to get help? I go in saying i dont need antidepressants and she gives me some and now im really depressed.. they just dont work.. im alway... View more

My doctor is always asking if i have suicidal thoughts.. obviously i do. Or she wouldnt ask.. why is it so hard to get help? I go in saying i dont need antidepressants and she gives me some and now im really depressed.. they just dont work.. im always wound up and just moved house had a baby went on leave form a hard working job, had losses, its all big stuff.. ive kinda lost who I was, worse i feel like my partner turnes my worries into his or makes it about him.. I'm just lost... and alone. I used to self harm, im very tempted again especially when no ones hearing me out... and today i feel like the only reason im still here is becauee of my kids.. i love my partner to death but he's missing the mark, I'm a new mum again.. cant things be about me for a bit? I dunno am I selfish?.. i just dont want this any more.. everything else has failed in my life.. if this relationship goes down so will I ...

vnsjkdnds why i’m still here
  • replies: 4

honestly, the only thing that has kept me from acting on any on my thoughts is the fact that my dog won’t know where i’ve gone and won’t know when i’m coming back, and without him i don’t think i would still be here today

honestly, the only thing that has kept me from acting on any on my thoughts is the fact that my dog won’t know where i’ve gone and won’t know when i’m coming back, and without him i don’t think i would still be here today

Rah33 Suicidal thoughts
  • replies: 2

I suffer from depression/anxiety/PTSD. My suicidal thoughts have increased over the last few years. I catch myself thinking about suicide more frequently thinking it may be easier to end my life. I don’t think I have the ability to actually end my li... View more

I suffer from depression/anxiety/PTSD. My suicidal thoughts have increased over the last few years. I catch myself thinking about suicide more frequently thinking it may be easier to end my life. I don’t think I have the ability to actually end my life. I dont want to die but don’t really feel living suits me either . I have a husband who supports me, I’m scared to tell him of my thoughts Because I don’t want to upset him, I feel guilty for having these thoughts. I don’t go to the doctors because I will avoid interaction with people where I can. The last medication I tried gave me sleep paralysis and I am scared to start a new medicine because of side effects

Saree_p Bipolar ups and downs
  • replies: 6

You know when those times hit??? When you seek the appropriate services to manage your condition. When they turn around and say convention treatment isn't working and let's try this. The sinking feeling hits. Nothing is going to be. Nothing is ok. Th... View more

You know when those times hit??? When you seek the appropriate services to manage your condition. When they turn around and say convention treatment isn't working and let's try this. The sinking feeling hits. Nothing is going to be. Nothing is ok. The thoughts then darken further, if possible. Work is problematic and your unsure if you have a job. The one thing you are sure about, Nothing will ever change.

Mellow1474 I was doing so well... but I relapsed :(
  • replies: 4

HEY GUYS, this post might be triggering to some, I'm just In search of some advice. I'm in my early 20's and for the second time in the space of a year and a half I have attempted to take my life. My 2nd attempt was 4 days ago and I am currently stil... View more

HEY GUYS, this post might be triggering to some, I'm just In search of some advice. I'm in my early 20's and for the second time in the space of a year and a half I have attempted to take my life. My 2nd attempt was 4 days ago and I am currently still in hospital. As soon as I woke up I have been determined to get to the bottom of what has just happened. I am so confused and scared because after the 1st attempt I have worked so hard to get where I am and I was so proud of my growth. I didn't think I was capable of doing this again. I am diagnosed bipolar and on anti psychotic medication. The first time round long story short. Was in a reallly bad relationship couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, no self worth, I hated myself. I thought I was the worst person in the world and all I did was hurt people. When I was in that rock-bottom I genuinely thought I would be doing everyone a favour. I survived and I am so lucky to have had my family and friends to support but I'm so lucky to have the strength I did to get myself where I am now. Since I have done a bit of travelling. Backpacking for 6 months, now have landed in place I could settle for a bit got myself a really good job in retail and another job in a bar was living in a hostel having fun! For 3 weeks I have been here. Loving it. But the other day? I was drinking with friends had an amazing afternoon a fun night. Then I lost my wallet. Was searching for my wallet then all of a sudden got this overwhelming feeling and all of a sudden I was feeling exactly like I was the day I made my 1st attempt. And In a split second ... I'm here. I now have to go home unfortunately, but I'm happy I get to see my friends and fam from home. I am in search for DBT I have heard that is good? I'm sad about the situation but I am.more hopeful then anything, I want to live, I love life. I don't want this to happen to me again. If you have any advice or feel comfortable sharing your road to recovery I am all heart and ears

carer1 is there a Mental Health System??
  • replies: 3

Warning maybe triggering or depressing you call /chat for help , if your at risk or someone thinks you are the cops or ambulance are called, they keep you to one side of the ER for up to 8 hours then let you go, back into what ever caused you to be i... View more

Warning maybe triggering or depressing you call /chat for help , if your at risk or someone thinks you are the cops or ambulance are called, they keep you to one side of the ER for up to 8 hours then let you go, back into what ever caused you to be in the ER in the first place. Its not the workers fault they do what they do with what they have. Its the government playing withd peoples lives. Its too much money to do anything else. To find out what needs doing and do it. so those like me are left in our holes. What are the answers besides suicide ??