Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Clea Struggling
  • replies: 2

I'm really struggling. I am going to a psychiatric clinic on Thursday but I have been so many times and get out and then just go back to struggling. My kids were taken off me in 2022 and I just can't cope without them. So I'm trying to get better and... View more

I'm really struggling. I am going to a psychiatric clinic on Thursday but I have been so many times and get out and then just go back to struggling. My kids were taken off me in 2022 and I just can't cope without them. So I'm trying to get better and get help whilst struggling. My mental health was used to take them off me but then I'm suffering more because I don't have them. They were my world and now I feel so alone. I am starting to wonder if I should give them up and move on if I can. Cos it hurts so much not having them and then being kept from me.

Anna84 Tired of living but have to for my husband and kids
  • replies: 30

I am so exhausted and feel like every day is a battle but I can’t talk to anyone because no body wants to listen to someone complain. Especially when there is nothing to complain about really. I’m tired of pretending I’m ok. I love my kids and my hus... View more

I am so exhausted and feel like every day is a battle but I can’t talk to anyone because no body wants to listen to someone complain. Especially when there is nothing to complain about really. I’m tired of pretending I’m ok. I love my kids and my husband so much which is why I have to keep going. This feeling never goes away but some days or weeks are just harder.

jon-doe1 I don’t want to be here no more
  • replies: 1

My mum has stage 4 cancer and it’s the tipping point for me. I already hate my life . I have no supportive people around me. My misses goes off at me if I’m depressed because I tell her nothings wrong. I don’t want to tell her my feeling ma because s... View more

My mum has stage 4 cancer and it’s the tipping point for me. I already hate my life . I have no supportive people around me. My misses goes off at me if I’m depressed because I tell her nothings wrong. I don’t want to tell her my feeling ma because she isn’t the nicest of people.

Chocolate-milk I just want someone to talk to
  • replies: 4

Just wanna preface this by saying I am currently safeLife is becoming increasingly harder to deal with say to day. Staying clean and alive is something I have to put constant effort into.I feel so selfish for wanting to not live anymore when I have a... View more

Just wanna preface this by saying I am currently safeLife is becoming increasingly harder to deal with say to day. Staying clean and alive is something I have to put constant effort into.I feel so selfish for wanting to not live anymore when I have a bunch of support, but all I want is for someone to talk to me, so I'm not just alone in my room at whatever ungodly hour it is.

Eagle Ray Suicidailty and DSP application
  • replies: 4

I am on the cusp of applying for the Disability Support Pension. The disability employment agency I’m with and my psychologist are supportive and encouraging for me to do this. At 48 I’ve had lifelong chronic pain and multiple challenges with traumat... View more

I am on the cusp of applying for the Disability Support Pension. The disability employment agency I’m with and my psychologist are supportive and encouraging for me to do this. At 48 I’ve had lifelong chronic pain and multiple challenges with traumatic and stressful experiences. In 2005-2008 my pain levels were extreme and I had to stop work but fought my way back into work doing a program with the then Commonwealth Rehab Service and retraining at TAFE to be an education assistant. I was on synthetic opioid meds to be able to do this. I’ve worked at many jobs over the years. In the last few years my stress levels have been extreme as a primary carer to my parents before they died and numerous other stresses. I’m diagnosed with complex PTSD from childhood experiences and have an autoimmune liver disease. Although on the face of it I may look like a good candidate for DSP, I know it’s extremely hard to get now. The process itself triggers me and I find suicidality comes up every time I have to deal with it. I’ve been advised by an advocacy group who provide advice on DSP to apply on either mental health grounds or physical health grounds but not both as if you fail the impairments test on one they will fail you on both. They’ve also advised the hour long job capacity assessment interview involves them trying to trip you up multiple times by asking you the same question in different ways. Basically it is an adversarial process designed to make you fail. Someone else with my employment agency who cannot stand up for more than 5 minutes at a time was refused it. A man I met at a DSP info session was also told he won’t be able to get it despite the gruelling impacts of two cancers and immunotherapy that has damaged his cognitive capacity and ability to function. I’ve had fibromyalgia since 13, a condition many doctors have not considered real. I’ve actually had a doctor throw a packet of anti-inflammatories at me and told to “get over it” when I went to him for a second opinion about a med another doctor wanted to put me on. I’ve had severe migraines since 13 as well and the only way I got through decades of work was to medicate as I would be debilitated with the frequent migraines otherwise. The liver disease I now have may even be partly a consequence of the long term medication to be able to get through the work day. So I just feel scared and seriously overwhelmed with the DSP application. I am so tired of fighting to survive. I just need to express how I feel.

timingiseverything Exhausted
  • replies: 1

After a lengthy hospital stay and 8 ECT’s, I’ve gone full circle and started to think about it again.I can’t find a decent Psychologist and my family is nervous which I can totally understand, as next time failure is not an option. Does anyone else l... View more

After a lengthy hospital stay and 8 ECT’s, I’ve gone full circle and started to think about it again.I can’t find a decent Psychologist and my family is nervous which I can totally understand, as next time failure is not an option. Does anyone else love their family so so much but still not want to be here??

Guest_5147 advice?
  • replies: 2

i've been going to a therapist since i was pretty young, around year 4 but only for anxiety and never anything bigger. recently i've been going through a rough patch and just felt kinda useless and lonely. when i told my therapist about this she aske... View more

i've been going to a therapist since i was pretty young, around year 4 but only for anxiety and never anything bigger. recently i've been going through a rough patch and just felt kinda useless and lonely. when i told my therapist about this she asked my parents about anti depressants and they refused to try. since going through this rough patch i've only just started sh (about 2 months ago) and i think i should tell my therapist but don't know how. can anyone give advice?

Maddie.f Help I guess.
  • replies: 2

Idk what to do anymore. I’ve been here before where I have tried to take my own life before and I haven’t started cutting again but the only reason is because I can’t be bothered to buy the razors. I have tried multiple therapists and been on differe... View more

Idk what to do anymore. I’ve been here before where I have tried to take my own life before and I haven’t started cutting again but the only reason is because I can’t be bothered to buy the razors. I have tried multiple therapists and been on different medications but nothing works, I’ve tried those self help apps with the cute animals. I’ve even tried starving myself to be better. I’m afraid that if I go down this path again I will not make it out the other side. I have nobody to talk to about this. I scared my best friend and my dad last time and my mother doesn’t care about me. Don’t try to tell me she probably does because I really know she doesn’t. I feel it coming. I have no drive or motivation anymore. The things I enjoyed don’t matter anymore and I feel myself distancing myself from my friends and family. Whenever I try to imagine a future for myself my mind goes blank. I really can’t go through this battle again. All I want is to be happy and to feel loved but I can’t even remember how that feels.I want to stop being selfish. I want to stop failing at helping people. I want to stop failing at everything I do. I want to be somebody’s first choice and I want to like what I see in the mirror. I want what I see other people have. I’m terrified to get the energy to buy a razor because hurting myself felt like a punishment I deserved but I know that if I do then I will be so angry with myself after. I feel like I’m watching myself fall down this pit and I feel like I can’t do anything about it. I don’t want to be alone anymore. I want someone to care about me like I care about them. I don’t want to hurt myself or anyone around me but I’m terrified that I’m going to get to a point where all of this is too much and I will forget about the pain they will feel just to release myself from my own pain. It’s been three years since my first attempt and I hate myself for not being better.

nixxyboo Memory blanks
  • replies: 1

Ever since I was a kid I have struggles with anxiety and depression. Now tho whenever I tend to harm I have no memory of doing it what so ever. Does this happen to anyone else?

Ever since I was a kid I have struggles with anxiety and depression. Now tho whenever I tend to harm I have no memory of doing it what so ever. Does this happen to anyone else?