Hi Emma
I think one of the greatest challenges faced in life involves not being raised in how to manage the major or massive challenges we come across as we go along. While some may say 'You can't teach a child how to manage incredible challenge and perhaps trauma', I think basic management is something that can be taught. It might sound a little like 'You need to learn to read, feel and trust (how you feel). You need to learn to understand why you're feeling life the way you are and sometimes you'll need help with working this out'. I think it tends to go the other way as we're growing up; we tend to be conditioned to suppress feelings or keep them to our self until they become too unbearable to live with.
I think there are few feelings that compare with 'the tipping point'. The tipping point has a whole feel of its own. With a balance of what's tolerable and what's intolerable, the tipping point tips the balance. All it can take is one more challenge. Before that one challenge is added, there's a teetering kind of feel. I don't believe we're designed to do what's completely intolerable alone. I've found it's an impossible thing to live with, without help.
When I ask 'Who in your mind do you see as being someone who could make a difference?', I can relate to depression being something that doesn't always allow us to generate a clear vision. Something led you here for a start. Whether you saw the forums as the place to come or you heard 'Try Beyond Blue' in your mind, I'm hoping this turns out to be the first of many steps the leads you in the best possible direction.
If you feel the need, give yourself the freedom to vent. Keeping pain inside is something we should never be taught to do.
