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- I hate myself and really can’t see a point
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I hate myself and really can’t see a point
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Everyone always says the same crap. It’s all lies and I honestly do not see any future…but I won’t kill myself, it causes people too much upheaval dealing with that and that’s not fair.
I feel like I have failed everything and have nope I can truly rely on.
I am a loathe-some overly serious person that eventually everyone gets tired of. I wasn’t always like this but now it’s layer upon layer so I think this is how I will always be.
I don’t trust medication so I don’t see that as an option either.
so I will wait out my days.
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Hello JackFrost and welcome as well as a very huge smile from me at your choice to join the forum today.
I too use humour, making light of a situation and trying to make others feel better as a coping strategy too, as you are so very right in that no matter what the vehicle looks like, the destination is the same. I can hear your emotional intelligence loud and clear in your post and it is so wonderful that you want to come along on the wellness journey but to also lift others on the way. I think you have alot to offer here.
I am so happy to hear that your true to who you are and what you stand for. There is really not a truer word spoken in that if someone does not like you well that is on them, and really has nothing to do with you. If we get about our lives with kindness, doing the best we can to do what is right and wholesome then if others and not too keen on who we are, they don't have to come on our journey.
Something you mention and I have only just learnt about this so feel it only appropriate to share, and that is "The Story". See you said that "At the moment Im down because I feel like I have let some people down. But I know if I speak to them, it wont be as bad as it is in my head". This is the very space I used to live in too, feeling like I have said or done the wrong thing and then going to town in my brain of all the reasons they don't like me, all the reason's that I am not a good friend and making up a whole "story" and then believing it. I have done some huge work in this space and now if I "feel" like I have said or done something I write it down, look at it, make an assessment to firstly "is that true?". If I did say something then I will call the person and ask them if I can chat to them about XYZ. The issue is very quickly defused and I move on with my life. Without all that anxiety and noise in my brain or "The Story". Sure at first it is hard and awkward, but when you do it it becomes easier the next time and then I find something else cool happens, you start to need to do it less as your lens becomes clearer.
I was the rumination queen so I challenge you for the fitness title..lol..it has been wonderful to chat to you JackFrost and I hope to chat to you some more. I am sorry it is a hard day for you, we are here, and we care and you matter so very much. It was so brave of you to post today.
Huge hugs
Sarah

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