Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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asking for help when i’m suicidal and telling me to just calm down. Trigger warning - Sexual Assault

replies: 4

hey everyone i’m izzy i’m 16 at the moment i’m currently doing vcal in year 11 i tried vce but it was too much on my mental health. i havnt been at school since 2019 and now i’m getting thrown into year 11 this year. This is my story. in 2016, i was in grade 6. there was an incident at the school which resulted in a school lockdown of around 5-6 hours. We had no food because our lunches where in another building. A lot of kids were crying and passing out including me. Eventually we were escorted out and taken to get our bags from our classroom and go into the junior building were they had labelled the classrooms in alphabetical order and if you had siblings. i found my little sister who was in year 2 who was 7 at the time. We were in such a large room and it was so terrifying. After my mum had picked us up she took us home and let and behold there was a huge fire across from my house. Ever since then i developed ocd and anxiety when i was 11-12 in 2016. My anxiety has always been with me since. it wasn’t as bad in year 7 but i still had to see a school counsellor. Year 8 at the end is where it all went down hill i stopped eating and developed an eating disorder and became anorexic. I gained the weight back and i hate myself so much now like looking back on the photos i was so pretty and skinny. Year 9 in 2019 is when i developed panic disorder and i would have constant panic attacks at school and home and i would have to get picked up from school constantly and leave class. People would judge me and tell me i was faking. my panic attacks would be so bad i sat in the coordinators office and wouldn’t catch the bus home. My lips would vibrate and i would be dizzy and nearly pass out. I eventually stopped going to school and just never went back. i went into modeling for a shoot and it was okay but they said to come back when i had matured. Throughout 2019-2020 i tried a specialist school for anxiety after not being at school for like 5 months. that’s where i met my ex boyfriend i wasn’t at the school for long. i then tried online school and it was good at the start and then i wanted to go to normal school but now that i’m back at normal school i hate it.

Relapsed

replies: 1

After 70 days I relapse and I don’t even care, like it’s not a big deal for me although I think it should be? The only reason I ever kept clean in the first place was so I didn’t have to hide it from my parents, I’m not even doing it for myself and I... View more

What does the CATT team do?

replies: 1

Hello I am OK at the moment, but I’m putting together a “safety plan” if I am suicidal, and who I can get support from at differing levels of distress. Can someone tell me why someone would call the CATT team rather than 000? What does the CATT team ... View more

Confused and heartbroken, need advice

replies: 1

Hi all, ive been with my partner for 3 years now. We don’t have the best communication skills in our relationship as my partner is not expressive at all, rather avoiding people and being by himself. He likes to handle things in own time, which I complete understand. I suffer with a lot of mental health issues, which have gotten worse over the last few months. I will admit that we haven’t been ourselves for the last 2-3 months. We are in a constant cycle of him getting frustrated with me over small things and me getting emotional. Last night I could not cope with my feelings anymore and relapsed into SH. when I told my partner broke down and said our relationship isn’t healthy and he knows he has treated me badly (which he absolutely has not). He told me he hasn’t been feeling himself for the past few months and he doesn’t know what’s wrong with him, that we need to break up because we’re just too different emotionally. My mum picked me up last night because he didn’t trust me to drive home by myselfand I am COMPLETELY heartbroken and confused. I just don’t understand how he can give up on us so easily. My partner lost a parent a few years ago which he told me he never got counsellling for, which is making me think that he has underlining issues he needs to sort out. Is our relationship really over or does he just need space? Did I scare him?? Please help me make some sort of sense out of this. Can someone please help me make sense of all of this??? I’m just so lost. Did me admitting my SH scare him?? Is it something he needs to sort out??

Hello! New and dunno what to do T_T

replies: 5

Hi everyone, I'm Mitch and I'm 24 ‍ I've been struggling with depression and anxiety among other things since I was 18. I think I might've been suffering since my early teens but did not get diagnosed until we moved to Australia because my home coun... View more

Hi everyone, I'm Mitch and I'm 24 🙇‍ I've been struggling with depression and anxiety among other things since I was 18. I think I might've been suffering since my early teens but did not get diagnosed until we moved to Australia because my home country treated mental illness as taboo... I've been medicated for it since 2014 and saw a psychiatrist for only a year. (I was not making any progress with her and could not afford to see another one) I have gotten better over the years, I was even able to complete a Cert III and Diploma in TAFE! I know it sounds silly but it's a feat that I thought was impossible for me since I have untreated ADHD, I couldn't even finish Yr 12. Anyway a month ago, I was able to land my first ever job as a casual waitress. I was a little nervous but overjoyed since I've been struggling to get a job which is understandable, nobody wants to hire a 24 y/o who has zero work experience (though I have been volunteering in an op shop on weekends) My problem is my depression is worsening again after starting my new job. I start crying and throwing up a day before my shift even starts because I dread it so much. I do still report in, it's just I get so anxious to the point I can't do much else but lie in my room until work. The job itself isn't too difficult, I can keep up with the physical demands and I don't mind getting criticism, but it's hard when the manager always looks at you like they want you dead. When I say hi/goodbye/thank you, they don't even bother to look at me. My co-workers are a little nicer but it's still clear that they don't want me there. I've even considered injuring myself so I can't come to work. I want to quit so bad but I feel that I'm overreacting, that this is something everyone goes through when they start their first job and I can't complain because I brought this on myself. I've been applying everywhere but have yet to get an offer so I'm starting to fall back into the mindset that I just wasn't meant for this world. I do have parents who love me and provide for me but I don't want them to spend the rest of their lives worrying about me. I do have friends but none of them close enough that I can share these thoughts comfortably. That's why I decided to share on this forum so I at least have an outlet for my worries. Thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings and I hope you are doing well on your end.

I gave in today. I just can't deal any more.

replies: 3

My aunt just passed away unexpectedly and im holding everyone up and being the strong one. The guy who's my best friend who has bpd and also self harms needs space because I broke his heart. I just got my steam account hacked and $1250 worth of items I'll never get back and posting on reddit got me abused. People who ive been there for and helped haven't even offered a message or anything. My neighbours are suing over the fence they destroyed. My mother is physically sick and im desperately so worried. My nan is getting so thin due to not eating at 85 from her sisters death. I have borderline personality and now my new psychiatrist thinks I have adhd. I feel so alone. I just want my items back but steam won't do anything eventhough the accounts have bot#53 in their names. I worked on getting that limited edition stuff for 10 years. I'm so devastated. I can't bring my aunt back nor my friend so at least give me my items I paid for. I've been laying in bed for hours and I ended up self harming. I just feel so alone and need help but when I reached for it I got bad mouthed.

The impulse just becomes more frequent and more serious

replies: 3

this post ended up basically just being a collection of things i wanted to vent about, sorry I used to only think about suicide maybe once a month or so, and it was very hypothetical. Over the last few months-year it's become much more of a thing in my mind, and recently I've had a few days planning to attempt it until it fell off later on. I don't know what's wrong with me but I'm just, generally not happy. My mood goes up and down a fair bit, but has become more consistently down over time. I don't enjoy much, everything feels like a huge, draining effort, and I'm just incapable of a lot of things anyway. I've been neglecting hygiene a lot more, I rarely end up showering more than once a week, though I guess that's normal for me. I've been overeating a lot, just because I have poor self control and it feels good, though I hate that I'm getting even fatter now. I was prescribed taking srri's for a bit, stopped taking them recently, I don't think I noticed any change. I've been referred to a psychiatrist over this and the possibility of ADHD, though the earliest I can see them is April. I don't know what I'm going to do once school starts again, I do absolutely nothing in class and have had declining grades and been failing more recently, I don't know how I'm supposed to be able to complete my assignments or major works when all I can bring myself to do is sit there and stare. I worry about how I'm meant to have any kind of future, I feel worthless, lazy and useless as a person, and worry a lot about wasting time and all the things I've missed out on already, and get jealous of other people's lives and qualities. I spend a lot of time just trying to get attention with my appearance or whatever online, though I can't post in the space I do that anymore so I guess that's over. this post kinda ended up just being a collection of things i wanted to vent about and wasn't really about anything I guess, sorry. probably forgot a bunch of stuff too.

Not sure on the best path forward

replies: 27

The older I get the more back story there is for anything to make sense and I don't like talking about myself at the best of times. It's been 15 years since I attempted suicide, 12 since I last self harmed. Since then I've gotten married and have a 1 year old now, so I don't want to be getting worse, I need to provide for my family. If I thought I could get away with it I would probably have fallen back into my old self harm habits. If I was going to kill myself I'd do my best to make it look like an accident, to be clear, I think it's very unlikely, but it's also at the forefront of my thoughts and the fact that I don't think it's an option makes me feel even more trapped. I saw a psychologist 6 years ago and was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum, that helped in a lot of ways, but made things harder in other ways. I'm more self aware about things, but that makes me realise that I am just incapable of passing for normal, no matter how hard I try. It was tough making that first step to see a professional and I'm not sure if I could do it again, maybe in the world of telehealth I would fare a little better though. What scares me the most is being hospitalised, apart from the obvious reasons, I've worked at the local hospital for 5 years now, I know everyone from security quite well, I've been in the mental health department to fix and upgrade a number of systems in recent years and I do my best to portray myself as a professional and keep myself in one piece. My anxiety went through the roof when I first had to work in the mental health department, although it actually seemed like a nice and safe space to be in as a patient, having a connection with so many people at the hospital terrifies me. I did try and talk to someone on online support yesterday, I just didn't know what to say, I don't know what I'm trying to do and it seems there are few options for people who struggle with talking face to face. At least, I think I'm looking in the right direction, even if I am slipping backwards.

Help with self-harm

replies: 5

Hello I have been struggling with sh for around 12 months. I have not yet found a truly motivating factor to stop and don't see the point in using alternative methods to release the tension when I don't find they work. I still seek help from my nearest and dearest but find it hard in difficult moments because I don't want to be stopped from sh. Just wondering if anyone else has had this experience and what you would recommend.

Lost and broken

replies: 2

Hey, First I better mention I'm not at risk of doing something silly despite the fact I dream of it every night and struggle with not wanting to be around. But I need help so I'll try paint the picture of my situation so someone can hopefully point me in right direction or give me tips some tips on staying alive to find my self worth and happy place again because Ive hit rock bottom. I suffer from severe depression and anxiety and have a very addictive personality. I know what I do is not helping my situation but can't seem to stop especially with the gambling. Everytime I start going okay I keep self sabotaging going further backwards than where I was and end up hurting the ones closest to me. I have 3 beautiful kids that I love dearly but In my eyes they better off without me. It's pretty sad when my oldest has told me she can't remember the last time I smiled. I just don't want to b here anymore and I can't keep living like this. Everytime I seek help I just end up getting thrown around from referral to referral and end up giving up Instead of getting to the bottom of it. I even a tried engaging in a social worker that was ment to b helping me sort out all my triggers and I explained that she has to book the appointments in and I'll b fine but if it's up to me to book I won't. Must have been put in the too hard basket never heard from her again. I've tried about 8 different medications nothing seems to help they just upset my stomach. I do struggle committing to this properly cause nothing has ever seemed to help and everything has escalated so got no idea where to start So this is my last chance to find my happy place, I come back from here before so i know I can do it again just need things in place to stop me falling back down. Really wish someone could tell me where do I start and what you do

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

asking for help when i’m suicidal and telling me to just calm down. ***Trigger warning - Sexual Assault*** replies: 4

Relapsed replies: 1

What does the CATT team do? replies: 1

Confused and heartbroken, need advice replies: 1

Hello! New and dunno what to do T_T replies: 5

I gave in today. I just can't deal any more. replies: 3

The impulse just becomes more frequent and more serious replies: 3

Not sure on the best path forward replies: 27

Help with self-harm replies: 5

Lost and broken replies: 2