Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Several hospitalisation questions

replies: 2

Two part post, one part relating to past experiences and the second about possible future options. A few years ago I attempted suicide in what one GP called a "near miss." I had intended to jump off a bridge but at the last second called my boyfriend for help. I've had several attempts before this one as well. After this attempt three years ago I got basically no help. I had two GPs at the same clinic who I had been seeing regularly, who were both supposed to be really good doctors and who I would see based on their availability. At the time I wasn't seeing a psychologist because mine had just retired and these two GPs just... Didn't have any recommendations for me to refer to, which was how I found all my previous ones. My question here is, why wasn't I hospitalised? I think I remember saying I didn't want to go to hospital because I'd heard some pretty scathing reviews about the mental health services in our area, but at that point I was stuck in that 24/7 suicidal mindset. I had a plan, and and attempt. I was terrified to be left alone. I don't understand why nothing was done. My second question is about how to know when to take yourself to hospital, and how that even works. Do you have to pay to go to a psych ward? I've been researching inpatient programs since the earlier incident and all of them require payment or private health insurance. Are there differences between emergency hospitals and non-emergency ones? How do you know when to check yourself in? Do they expect you to have a plan, or is just thinking a lot about hurting yourself enough? I feel like I'm stuck in this situation where I'm functional enough to survive each day, but over the past three years my mental health has deteriorated so far I feel like I can't do anything about it. I've seen counsellors and psychologists since then, but due to just a long series of unfortunate circumstances I haven't been able to see one for more than three months before the leave or the funding for their program got cut, or any other number of things. I've been referred and on a wait list for a private clinical psychologist my new, much better GP recommended for about a year, but apparently that wait list still has a few months left to go. I know this is a bit of a wall of text, so thank you for reading all the way to the end. Any advice from doctors or people who've had experiences with hospitalisation are appreciated

How do you keep going

replies: 16

I struggle with complex mental health issues. Lately its been getting worse. My days are mostly spent alone. Im not living I'm existing and I question is it worth it. I dont want to see people. I dont want to go out. I can't stand the noises around me. I'm just fed up, tired, lonely, depressed, anxious and it goes on and on. I find I am thinking more about death and dying. The end of the pain both mentally and physically. My sister-in-law committed suicide, I've seen the fallout it causes. I don't want to hurt my family, but I'm hurting so much and I just want it to stop. I've thought about talking about how I feel, but in the end I don't know how to start or what to say. I see a psych regularly, but I don't even know how to tell him. I'm on meds, I take them as prescribed. I dont like my life, I don't even like myself for having these thoughts. I struggle on little sleep and not eating right. I'm all over the place, mentally I feel exhausted, physically I feel like hell. And I don't know what to do. Thanks for listening.

Feeling lost

replies: 2

I don’t really know how to start this so I’ll just start. I have been struggling with my depression for 7 years. I only reached out for help after attempting to take my own life. I have been simultaneously taking antidepressants and seeing a psychologist for about a year and 7 months. I have had many ups and downs. Each up followed by a down that has left me feeling more devastated than the last. My last appointment was last Tuesday and I scored a 5 on the BDI. My last score was a 27. I shared that I had no suicidal thoughts or any thoughts of self harm. I was feeling normal again. I left my appointment feeling positive and hopeful. And then today, I endured one negative experience that triggered something horrible. It brought back all of the feelings of worthlessness and loneliness. It brought back the thoughts of life without me and I don’t know how to face tomorrow in this state. I don’t know how to face my psychologist because I’m afraid he will be tired of me. Is it normal to take this long to overcome these feelings? What if he gives up on me and I have no one left to believe in me?

On the Fence

replies: 10

I dont know what to do. i cant think straight and all the only thing going around and around my head is how sad i am, all the time. ive barely done any work on my assignments and prior commitments and all that because i was that confident that i was going to do it this morning. I almost did, i don't know what stopped me. this is so much worse than before, when i was so assured that id be dead soon and confident that it was the right decision, but now im not sure. i dont want to live anymore and im trying so hard to hold on but my head is chaos and i dont know what to do anymore. Im just feeling sad and i hate it and im dragging others down with me. i dont even know why im writing this when i dont really want help. i want to die but im scared. maybe i just need to talk? ive tried talking to people but its not working, i feel better for a little bit but it gets worse almost instantly, i need help

Trigger - self harm I suffer from anxiety and depression and struggle living out in the world myself and since i have started to wory about my gf

replies: 2

So my anxiety and depression keep me inside most of the time and usually that's only effected myself as I cannot live my life something I'm sure many of you are familiar with however lately my gf has been going out with freinds and she has a history of being sexually assualted so I'm very weary. When were out I steer clear of most men unless we know them and I don't let her follow random people on social media. I also don't allow her to post certain photos that may be a tiny bit on the strange side or anything that shows off her body which causes fights since she has her own mental struggles such as body dysmorpphia and claims she's just trying to be confident in herself. In the most recent incident it has driven me to self harm since the feeling that I can't do what's right for her and I can't be what she wants me to be and I irritate her and I am far too controlling and she deserves better. Which further continued the arguement since she hates when I self-harm and leaves me feeling more worthless. I know we only want what's best for eachother and I was wondering if anyone has experienced something similar before becuase I really love her and I don't wanna screw this up. Thank you much love and positivity to everyone reading this.

Trigger warning Assisted death

replies: 2

I just watched some of Laura’s choice. I became curious having attempted suicide over my own childhood sexual abuse trauma and failed court justice. All the support for recent high profile victims is great it was the opposite for me and I’ve briefly looked into the countries that assist with death. I wasn’t depressed this morning. I know this will pass. Family are a bit agressive right now. I’ve had a dreadful experience with mental health system they are not an option. My little cat is my only connection I can’t cope with the news.

Trigger warning: Self-harm Feeling Overwhelmed

replies: 3

I want to self harm at the moment so very much, the urge is so very strong and started about 2-3 weeks ago. It’s strange how I felt so in control, almost ’cured’ of this, and then, there are times out of the blue, perhaps, mixed with other vulnerabilities that weakened my defenses, and I find myself here again. I’m hoping that by writing it down may help to bring on a switch in negative behaviours. thanks for allowing me to be honest! Jules xx

Realisation

replies: 2

This evening I had to get out of the house, and go for a coffee, or anything. So I went into this bar that was quite busy. I am not a big drinker, so I ordered a Coke Zero and sat at my table alone. I tried to join in on a conversation at the table next to me, but they didn’t seem to be interested. I even offered to pay for someone’s drink, but they didn’t seem interested. I realise now that I have no place in this world. My whole entire life all that I have wanted to do is to fit in and belong. Now I know that it is no longer possible, maybe it is for the best to write a letter to my mum, and put an end to my loneliness.

hey, just want someone to talk to :)

replies: 4

ive been self-harming recently, not dramatically or anything. like I know people are so much worse of than me, but like I don't have anyone to talk to. i moved to a new town and everyone is racist and homophobic and sexist, and the people I'm around make it obvious that they hate me. I'm just tired and lonely, like everything just takes so much effort and when I fight with my parents SH kinda makes me feel in control. they noticed once but kinda just told me not to do it. i did finally get a therapist appointment which is good I guess. i just miss my old friends who understood and I cant talk to them bc my parents took my phone. anyway thanks love ya

Feels like im drowning

replies: 2

Today is hard, i am roughly 6 months pregnant and unemployed, my partner and i have been struggling for months to find jobs and have made the tough decision to move from Forster back to Sydney area. though we have more support and family down here its was not our first choice in options but we both realised that it is what is best for our children. Since getting pregnant i have struggled with many problems and issues from family drama from both sides to my step daughters birth mother drama. i feel like im barely hanging on these days and the urge to self harm or worse is getting stronger everyday. My partner and i have been struggling financially, as he is in alot of debt, and my insomnia has kicked back in to where i am barely sleeping most nights. The mental and physical strain is literally making me feel like im drowning and that i am inches away from breaking down completely. I dont know how much more i can take of this and no matter how many times i say this to my partner i dont think he is quiet understanding what i mean, which just makes me feel more alone than i want to be right now. I dont know what else to do, other than revert back to old habits which i am trying so hard not to give in to for the sake of my baby.

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Several hospitalisation questions replies: 2

How do you keep going replies: 16

Feeling lost replies: 2

On the Fence replies: 10

*Trigger - self harm* I suffer from anxiety and depression and struggle living out in the world myself and since i have started to wory about my gf replies: 2

*Trigger warning* Assisted death replies: 2

*Trigger warning: Self-harm* Feeling Overwhelmed replies: 3

Realisation replies: 2

hey, just want someone to talk to :) replies: 4

Feels like im drowning replies: 2