Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Life after attempt(s)

replies: 13

Hi, I survived an attempt lately that I still physically recover from. I understand now that you I could have died. I still don’t know if I wanted to die or if I just wanted peace from myself. I’ve been there before and that scares me. I don’t trust myself anymore. I have made changes in my life since discharge from hospital and trying to see ‘my new life’ in a positive way. I feel a lot of guilt and shame because I hurt people, I did something that is morally wrong, I let people down, I felt humiliated when being treated... I’m also shocked, I don’t actually know what feelings they are, they leave me empty and confused. I don’t feel like I’m ‘over’ this latest episode and I don’t want to talk to people around me because they’ve gone through too much with me. Are there people out here who understand what I mean? What feelings are that? How did they move on? Thank you

So lost

replies: 2

I honestly do not know what to do. My wife refuses to get help for childhood sexual abuse and for other issues throughout her childhood. We have been together for a decade now. And she was fine until the 3rd trimester of her first pregnancy. She suddenly devoloped pains during intercourse yet nothing was found. As the years have gone on her mental health has slowly declined and anything to do with males doing or saying the wrong thing to her she would get extremely worse and her medical problems both sexually and other unknown cause problems have become more regular and worse. We no longer have any form of sexual relationship and has been like this for roughly 7 8 months. The sexual side I am not worried about. Since all these problems began she has become more and more emotionally detached, no affection, no communication, i try to approach her and explain how this is now affecting me mentally, i just get shut down and blamed for anything or everything or if I stand my ground She believes everyone hate her. She isolates in her room at home will still get up to make a meal for kids but anything they do wrong she just gets angry and starts slamming things and goes back to hiding in the room. Kids get kids are just being snapped at for anything. I say something and then she is doing same to me. I have asked her to get help she refuses as doctors never find anything and talking does not help as councillors have said its in her head. My mental health has been getting worse as a result. Being treated like I am hated yet she is happy when around others makes me feel hated it pkays on my head questioning if she is faithful. I am heart broken knowing she is a victim and am being left to feel like a failure as a husband lover and friend. Anytime she is upset I ask and reassure I am here for her all I get is " Im fine". I now feel non existant in my marriage. To make this all better everything else is going wrong. My father died 3 days after xmas, my son came to me anout being sexually assaulted by kids his age, our financial position is screwed as talking about her money just triggers her also our cars broke down mine having to be sold for scrap as repairs were byond our means my wifes car same day dad passed. All in last 3 months. I can not take this anymore. I am holding together barely for my kids if not for them I would have ended my life.

CW. At the end of my tether

replies: 3

Hi all, First time poster I think..I don't even know anymore I'm at the point of wanting to end my life, can anyone suggest what to do to not do that? Thanks

At what age does it get easier

replies: 3

I’m 50 years old and have been working at managing my bi polar ( type 1) since first episode at 22 I had the hard time to start with but from say 35 to 45 had it managed reasonably well but it has got harder to manage as I’m getting older is this a common thing this is my first time on this site would like to know if this is the normal progression with it because it’s just really grinding me down thankyou

Over it all all too much

replies: 57

I am in such a bad place right now, I know you are not a crisis service and not expecting crisis support. But I am done. I was going to end my life last week. Stupidly told my therapist when she texted me that morning that I was going to do that. The day ended with me taken to hospital by police and undergoing assessment. I was scheduled but luckily managed to convince someone the next day that I was no longer feeling that way and was allowed to leave with follow up. I should have not have told my therapist what I was going to do. Then police etc would not have known and been chasing me. I talked to lifeline last night and told them about recent events and plans I have. Thankfully not completely immanent or they would have called police too! But no more police, no more hospital and no more anything. I am tired of putting people through all this and just want to get it all over with. This has been dragging on for so so long and I am tired.

Sad thoughts

replies: 7

I sit here crying because I don’t want to hurt my family and everyone that loves me but I don’t want to be here anymore

Depresion is crushing my acting career...

replies: 6

I am 5 years out of UNI where I studied acting and since then I have been doing well in my theatre career. However I feel like I'm loosing my momentum/motivation of making new works for the stage due to my depression resurfacing. I have been dealing with genetic anxiety/depression for over 10 years now; I have been seeing a theripist and taking medication for 7 of those years on and off. It's scaring me that I'm no longer motivated to get on stage and show my work, I know that I love it but my depression is getting in the way. I want to get back into my grove and keep creating but I don't know how to do that when my will to live is so low... Any advice/help would be greatly appreciated.

What do I do? I feel done

replies: 13

Without sharing to much I feel trapped and I feel like the responsible thing to do is talk to someone about it but i don't have a phone and no online options are available and I know talking to those I live with won't help, I'm sitting here with a method of finishing things debating the pros and cons and I'm only seeing pros, I have no idea what to do but I know what I want to do and its to stop feeling stressed and sad and living around idiots and being stuck no id or anything to even be able to get out off this mess and even though offing myself won't make me happy I won't feel bad anymore because wont feel anything. what do I do?

Is the system set up to let you fail?

replies: 3

After a long history of depression and a complex mental and physical health history, today I have reached the point where I feel I can no longer tolerate and sit with this anymore. I have always struggled to ask for help, but today I did. I used the text service at lifeline, the suicide call back service, I tried to call my GP, email my Psychologist and call my Psychiatrist. My husband called CATT. Yet here I am, sitting here alone, I remeber when I started to have suicidial thoughts I was terrified to share them with health professionals for the fear that they would take control of my life and I would have no say. But now, the pressure of knowing that I am the only thing between me and my end, that there is no safety net, there is no service that will help me or no person in my life that knows how, makes me feel completely defeated. What I wouldn't give for someone to take control for me at this point. They say to speak to someone if you are not OK. So I guess I am wondering, what now? Now that I have put my feelings and thoughts out there and expressed how unsafe I feel, who helps now? Because all those people and services that I thought were meant to help in this exact moment, don't seem to want/or be able to do a thing.

Fear of becoming another Victorian lockdown statistic

replies: 5

I have fought the urge to write another thread here today, but am feeling extremely isolated due to the latest snap lockdown in Victoria. I’ve had a bad couple of weeks and came close for the first time ever, to ending it all. I ended up being talked into going to hospital emergency where I was admitted for 3 days of care. I then transferred to a residential recovery centre, supposedly for a couple of weeks, but due to a number of circumstances, including covid restrictions, ended up home on my own again, but with a small positive hope of some face to face support in my community…. then the lockdown happened! I live in a regional community where no case have ever been, but I have to endure the isolated lifestyle because it’s the law, and my struggle has been worsening independent of covid. When admitted to hospital, I had the most severe anxiety and depression I have ever experienced and spent most of the time crying for no reason. I fear now the same cycle is beginning, with the anxiety pangs building, and feel the never ending restrictions leave no hope of every recovering. I wish I could live in another state, where on the whole most people have lived with some degree of freedom. I live on my own, and I am now not allowed to visit anyone, nor anyone come to my house. Surely if I’m in such a state, there could be an exemption for that, as I may end up gone anyway, regardless of the risk of covid infection. I have been given a local crises hotline, but I’m too timid to ring it. And no one is allowed to physically visit me anyway. I'm condemned to talk to people on virtual for the rest of my life! I started on antidepressants a couple of weeks ago, but they have caused me more problems and I won't take them anymore. I'm tired and the world has become too complicated, and is not for me

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Life after attempt(s) replies: 13

So lost replies: 2

CW. At the end of my tether replies: 3

At what age does it get easier replies: 3

Over it all all too much replies: 57

Sad thoughts replies: 7

Depresion is crushing my acting career... replies: 6

What do I do? I feel done replies: 13

Is the system set up to let you fail? replies: 3

Fear of becoming another Victorian lockdown statistic replies: 5