I am losing it: crap job, everything is going to shit...

[Jessksch]

I am just so done with everything...my job is at its worst point in the manager does not care to supply our shop and it looks empty. People keep asking if we're closing down and I just don't know...my hours have been cut too...

Been looking everywhere for something that is not retail. I wanted to continue my studies but can't find find a work placement...

I look at things around me and it's just more corruption and nothing is getting done...

Usually my psychologist would say it's not my responsibility and I personally shouldn't worry about it now since I'm not in a position to do anything about it, well, it still doesn't give me a reason to go on.

I have a partner and pets but it has gotten to the point that I don't care about them anymore, I have nothing to look forward to anymore.

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Let's look at the comment your psych said. "...it's not my responsibility and I personally shouldn't worry about it now since I'm not in a position to do anything about it..."  there is a lot of truth to that statement. Examples- say you worked in a factory that is low on funds and looks like its closing down. The CEO and staff fly interstate and use first class. The workers are outraged! Well, what if the company had a sister group that paid for first class eg it was free. It would be a dangerous assumption that it came out of company funds. Another- Say you voted Labor at the federal election and they won then made budget cuts that caused some layoffs at your workplace. No matter what worrying you do nothing will change the situation.

Worry only causes ulcers.

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/worry-worry-worry/td-p/87808

So "worry" is not unlike intrusive thoughts, they cause extra brain activity for no real benefit. 

You dont like retail? I had a step son once and he worked in take away foods, left that job after 2 years and said would never cook fries again, went into retail, 6 months later went back to food lol Grass is greener etc.

Corruption? Life has corruption, it's a case of how much you should and do tolerate. Eg no one would complain if we took a company biro home from work, what if we took 10 biros, 100? Where does it become unacceptable and a crime? Well they are all criminal acts because they all come under theft but a judge faced with a person with a company biro in his pocket would dismiss it. A employee with a box of biros say 2000 would be prosecuted. So there is I suppose tolerable corruption and an invisible line of intolerable corruption and that line is fluid but usually is marked as what is acceptable by society.

It looks like you need another job fast though and that should be your immediate focus.

TonyWK

[Jessksch]

Yeah I have been looking but not having much luck at the moment: as I said no work placements for my course, and right now I can't get into anything besides retail, food or call centre jobs ( want to be able to make enough money to survive thank you).

And I think there is a point where it's above biros and just plain old taking money to get a CEO out of prison for raping an underage girl type corruption I can't take and it seems to be almost everywhere now.

Also, people only seem to be getting richer and even with a bachelor degree I have nothing.

It was never the idea that someone with a bachelor degree would be a requirement to work in a retail job, and now it's basically compulsory. It's sickening.

Why go on if it takes more and more work to just get basic things that a human wants: a house and a job with free time to enjoy life.

If I have to wait till I'm over 70 to get that than f_k that, I'm out.

[Jessksch]

I'm not getting any better, I keep wanting to take the next step but worry of failing again or my partner finding me and ruining his life because of it...I don't want to be trapped anymore in my mind, but I don't want to be trapped in a hospital again. I can't sleep, I want to feel better about the world but it's pressing down on me very hard: everything is getting worse and I have no one to turn to because everyone has their own problems or health issues to deal with...

I'm in so much pain, it hurts so much and it's so unfair that I have to keep going or choose a painful way to go. Why am I not allowed to choose myself when it's time?

[Jessksch]

I just wrote a message to my boss and coworkers I'm taking some leave to settle my health...

For the last few weeks my depression has plummeted. My job wasn't doing well in this economy and I couldn't find anything else and just have been stressing about myself.

I'm over 30 and still working in retail and I have been looking everywehre to find placement for my course I want to continue but keep getting denied.

It has gotten really bad that I just have been thinking very bad thoughts and sleeping all day and just have no motivation for anything anymore.

It sucks because I just went through a chagne of medication and been on it for two months when now suddenly my motivations has gone down again. I guess it was just a long placebo effect.

I feel sad because the work was great, but in the end the manager was more concerned with a different shop in another lcoation that we were getting emptier and emptier, people kept asking me if we were closing down and it really made me upset about the things.

Not to mention how things are going in the world at the moment...

I feel a bit guilty but my health has come to the point where I just don't care anymore.

[Jessksch]

IT has been a while now, but I am not feeling great at the moment. I had no problem before since I don't have to worry about paying bills or rent as I am lucky with money, but I have been depressed and not being able to find anything to motivate me to go on. I have been having sleeping problems and sleeping during the day no matter how hard i try to get back to normal, and my fiacne got angry he saw me sleeping again. He felt bad later but still, it ruined my mood pretty badly now than it already was.

I am kind of "stuck" in that I want to find a job, but all I find are retail jobs and I want something to be able to sustain myself and not rely on others. I have been looking at studying something but all trades require a car at some point (I am deathly afraid of driving and have been taking lessons for years with no progress on my confidence) or others are jobs that I am not smart enough to do/or no jobs in the future.

I am seeing my psychologist on Thursday, but lately even after I still don't feel better about myself or anything.

I just don't know what to do with myself, my future, nothing interests me anymore and everytime I aimed for something, my dream was utterly destroyed.