Hello,

[Barry66]

Hi,

this is the saddest moment. I’m so sorry. I hope there is hope here?

b

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Barry66..

A very warm and caring welcome to our wonderful forums...

So very sorry that you have had the saddest moment..My heart breaks for you...You’ve written just a few words...and they tell me that you’re struggling so much...

We are all here for you lovely Barry...with so much care, compassion and yes hope...I believe that hope never leaves us..it might at times get lost in our negative thoughts..but we can find it again....I hope through the support and care of the amazing community here..you can find yours again..

Talk anytime you feel up to it....and please let us know how your feeling, thinking etc....so we know that your safe..

My kindest and most caring thoughts..dear Barry..

Grandy..

[smallwolf]

HI and welcome to beyond blue.

It sounds like things are a real struggle for you at the moment. Please know this is a safe place where you can chat and the people here are supportive and non judgemental. When you want to, I hope you might be able to tell a little more of your story and what brought here.

Peace and comforting thoughts to you.

[Barry66]

Hi,

i am carrying this world on my shoulders, I am dirt, I help everybody, I am alone, I wake everyday with the thought of suicide. I wake to that choice every morning, 4 years now. No end to this depression, so so tired. So very sad, no numb to any other emotion except suicide.

I have no where to turn.

b

[Sophie_M]

Hi Barry,

We are so sorry to hear that you are feeling so burdened and hopeless. It sounds like you've had a long journey and we hear that it's been painful and exhausting. Please know that you are not alone in this and that there is support available to you. We are trying to get in touch with you privately to check in and offer you some support in this painful time. 

If at any time you become an immediate danger to yourself, this is an emergency - please contact 000 (triple zero).

You can also contact Lifeline. Lifeline is a national charity providing all Australians experiencing emotional distress with access to 24 hour crisis support and suicide prevention services. You can call them 24/7 on 13 11 14, or chat with them online 7pm-midnight AEDT - https://www.lifeline.org.au/crisis-chat/

It's important that you get some support. Can we ask if you are currently accessing any kind of mental health support, or have you in the past? For help finding mental health support, we would recommend that you get in contact with the Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 3pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.

Please know that we are all here for you, and many in this community have experienced these kinds of feelings in the past. We are here to offer you some support and advice. You are valuable, and deserving of kindness and help through this time. Please feel free to reach out here anytime.

[smallwolf]

I hope you don't mind me saying this... except that to be dirt and help everybody sounds a little bit of a contradiction. Except that I think your reference to dirt is how you think others feel about you, or you feel about yourself.

And yet, if you help everyone then ... and if you work on the basis of Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, you might hope for some sort of support from others, the everyone you are helping? I am only guessing.

The one thing I would like to mention is about your helping everyone, which also sounds like you might not have any time for yourself.

Could you tell me a little more about how you help everyone else and who these people might be? I would like to chat more with you

[missep123]

Hi Barry66,

I am so sorry to hear that you have been feeling this way.

How have you been feeling today?

Have you seen a mental health professional before?

We are definitely here for you. It really sounds like you do a lot for people and you are a kind and compassionate person.

[Ggrand]

Hello Barry..

I am saddened by the words your have posted..and am so sorry you feel that way about yourself..

As Small wolf has said, you are helping others around, shows us you have a beautiful heart and soul...and this is so unfair..when they are not their for you...I can say that we will be here for you and we hope that we can talk with you and help you through this very rough and horrid patch that you are stuck in...We care Dear Barry...

I can relate to waking up each day..with the SI thoughts....It caught me a few years ago..With the help of some professionals and myself...I have so far been strong enough to realise that those are only thoughts..nothing else and we don’t have to act on them.,,we can divert our unhealthy thoughts by caring for ourselves and doing things we like to do....I will say though..I couldn’t do it alone...I needed the help from professionals....If it’s okay Barry...I would like to gently urge you to talk to your Dr. about your thoughts and how your feeling....Drs. can help us..if we find a bit of courage to care enough for ourselves to reach out to them for help...

Please Barry...keep reaching out to us here...we care and want so much for you to overcome your depression...and feel some joy and happiness in your precious life..

My kindest thoughts dear Barry..with my care..

Grandy..

[M2]

Hi Barry,

I feel similarly. If nothing else, know that there is a group here that truly wants to help and be there for you.

I wish you the best.

Thanks

[Sad_Mushroom]

Hi Barry66 I used to feel like you do...

I used to feel like that for the first 36years of my life,,,,,then woke up one day and everything was fine. It just went away and I have no idea why.

Hang in there......please