A follow up

[51LV3R]

Nearly a year ago I posted to this forum because I was having trouble with self harm. 

 I followed the advice of some kind commenters though I was too nervous to speak to them individually or reply. I am grateful to all three of them. I sought out confidential counselling but I found it didn't do much for me. I might just have found the wrong person to speak to but she couldn't tell me or teach me anything I didn't already know and was very persistent that I involve my mother. 

 Eventually I did. Unfortunately it went exactly how I feared it would, she banned me from going to further counselling or speaking to my doctor about mental health issues and accompanies me everywhere except for school, where I am writing this from. I feel worse than ever. I can't talk to anyone and I'm scared. What do I do? Every day becomes harder to wake up. When I walk to school (she works mornings) I pass many roads and I keep wanting to hurt myself. My mother is going to start me doing driving lessons soon (she won't teach me) and I'm scared what I'll do when I have control of a vehicle. 

 I do not want to hurt myself anymore. 

[smallwolf]

welcome back.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. The fact you have come back here shows courage and strength. I would also add that your mother's response in preventing you from accessing mental health care is not okay. You deserve support, not isolation. Sorry.

Since you're at school, please consider talking to a trusted teacher or school counselor today. They may have  resources you can access. You can also access services like Kids Helpline at 1800 55 1800 or chat online at kidshelpline.com.au. They should be able to the support you, and they're confidential and understand exactly what you're experiencing.

Your life has value. If you want to talk more....

Maybe you could share something about things you like? 

[smallwolf]

Hi 51LV3R, Hope that you get to see this message. Just wanted to check-in with you to see how you were going. Listening if you want to chat.