Turning negatives into positives

[MarkJT]

I have always tried to turn a negative into a positive. Negatives are never nice to go through so i think it is really important that you get something out of it, for me that is anything that is positive.

Say for instance, i was hospitalised in Feb 2013 with PTSD, depression and anxiety. Whilst sitting in hospital with my life in tatters, I made a promise to myself that I am going to use my experience which at the time, was completely crap to help others. At that stage I didn't know how i was going to achieve this but in any event, it was something i promised.

I have since worked out how to do that and being part of this forum is one of them. I really enjoy help guide people who are at the start or in the middle of their journeys.

So i am just wondering, how do other people turn the negatives into positives?

When do you try and do this? i.e. at the start of the negative? In the middle? at the end?

I wonder if some people just cannot do that? I guess there would be.

Keen to hear your thoughts.

Cheers

Mark.

[Croix]

Dear Mark and all~

This is a tiny thing, but it helped two people. Tiny things have their place I guess.

I was having back problems and feeling down. The airline sent a golf-cart for me. The lady driving was as grim as grim can be. When we arrived at the terminal I simpy said "Thanks", she looked at me and said "That's the first time anyone's said that today".

I told her the joke about the asprin bottle. It's not much of a joke and she was being polite by smiling at it, but did drive off still with the smile. We had both cheered up.

Croix

[RandR]

Hi Mark,

Thanks for the post and definitely one that makes one ponder. The concept of turning negatives into positives is an interesting one. From my standpoint and experience I try to view my experiences regardless of whether they were + or - as just experiences. In the sense that regardless if the outcome was favorable to me it was an 'experience' nonetheless. Over time I've been able to look back at 'experiences' that were not entirely great, and been able to look at what life experiences I was able to develop, learn and grow from. I feel that life, like your character, is a makeup of all the goods, bad's, wondeful's and all the in-betweens.

I used to perceive life as an mathematical equation of positives and negatives. These days I simply take the stance that life is mathematical equation of experiences and experiences.


Ultimately the early days of my depression was categorizing my encounters as positives and negatives however over time, once I got control of my depression and took in a different perspective altogether I started simply looking at all my encounters as 'experiences'. And in most instances, the experiences that were the least 'favorable' built a stronger character within myself 🙂

Thanks again Mark 🙂

[MarkJT]

RandR, you have summed it up really well in that the events in your life, even though they were negatives, they have still helped build a better you and that is ultimately what i would so love for everyone to achieve. Great stuff!!

Croix: pretty simple word is "thanks" but as you say, can make a world of difference.

Mark. ​

[blondguy]

Hi Mark

I hope this isnt 'off topic' in any way.

Neil Mitchell (3AW) to Jeff Kennett in the 1990's (on Jeffs once week visit as Premier)...."How are you Jeff?"

Jeff Kennett replied..."Im just fine Neil...I saw the ceiling when I woke up and knew its going to be a good day"

It doesnt get any better Mark

Best

Paul

[CMF]

Blaming others for our problems/situations gives them the power. We can't change something if we are wasting our time and energy blaming others or e pecking them to Fix something.

I've realised lately that if we take responsibility for our problems/situations we give ourselves the power to change it. We take control and do what we need to do for ourselves.

cmf

[MarkJT]

Paul: When i ask a work mate how he is going, he always responds with, "The heart is beating so nothing to complain about". Think this goes in the same theme as what Jeff said. Hugely positive i see that.

CMF: Very very true and the people who seek that kind of power are trolls and the life. Very important to live by your own set of ethics and rules (as long as they are legal!!).

Mark.​