Started Drinking Again

[Dorey]

I’m trying to find triggers that has made me drive to the bottle shop and get a carton of beer.

i haven’t drank in ages but today I wanted too and it’s not because I want one, am on my own working away from my family but it’s been ok until tonight.

ive drank six bottles in one hour and have work tomorrow it’s like my mind is just doing it without me wanting too.

im taking anti depressants and have been for nearly a year now.

i keep fit and have been running also just don’t know what has made me decide to start drinking again tonight.

[therising]

Hi Dorey

Sounds like a bit of a mystery. All I can tell you is I drink once in a blue moon for only a couple of reasons, 1) for the taste and/or 2) to change my mind. I used to be a heavy drinker but now only drink a few times a year and these are basically the triggers for me. By the way, my husband has a beer fridge, so the stock is always there yet not the temptation.

The mind changing aspect of alcohol is my #1 lure and I will binge on more than just a few to achieve it. Keep in mind (in relation to loving the taste or loving the mental change factors), we typically don't consume a stack of cola or orange juice in one sitting, the binging relates to more than just loving the taste of alcohol. The buzz of simply feeling 'different' from the norm can be reason enough to crack a cold one and typically keeping us heading towards a hangover the next day.

I do not beat myself up the next day after a binge, I simply say 'Yesterday I felt like 'changing personalities' and today I don't. Today, I am content with myself even though I feel thoroughly ill.' So, don't go beating yourself up if you have to take a day off work; today you're a different person. Keep in mind, while you're riding the low, the effects of alcohol are known to act as a depressant. In other words, if you end up feeling bad about the binge, it's your brain just doing its thing as it reacts to the change in chemistry.

Take care

[geoff]

Hello Dorey, welcome to the site, I'm pleased you have posted your comment.

I know what you have said is common because being by yourself and something has happened during the day which you may not have expected and you have no support could be a reason why you wanted to drink, not intentionally though, but this follows the same pattern to when you were drinking.

It puts all your concerns back into one big problem, so you're sitting in a room all by yourself trying to cope with whatever has happened so alcohol soothes your mind, it doesn't mean you want to drink but you have to.

There's a difference between 'want to' and 'have to' just a subtle difference, because you 'want to' have a drink when your mates come around for a BBQ, while 'have to' is where the addiction has total control over you, so as soon as you hop out of bed you 'have to' have a drink.

You may want to drink to relieve any stress and/or anxiety and the first drink may relax you, but the more you drink the more these problems will affect you and that's what no one ever thinks of, what they think of is the instant effect and not the long term effect.

What may also happen is that your AD's aren't working as expected and now that you are by yourself had 6 bottles in an hour, as the family won't tell you off.

Recovery is an ongoing process but will be challenged by falling into old habits and when you're by yourself you have no support to say 'hey you don't have to drink, we're here for you.'

Another trigger is that you've had a relapse and need to temporarily numb it.

Geoff.