coping

[poisontree]

hey everyone 

how do you cope with feelings of hopelessness? i’ve been feeling quite overwhelmed and defeated mentally lately (past 5 months). i’m struggling to envision a future for myself and sometimes things just don’t feel real? if that makes sense? i’m 20 and feel really bleak about my life and the future, especially because a lot of my peers are excelling in their lives. i’d appreciate any advice, thanks. 

[Jimmy11]

Hey Poisontree,

It's okay to not have life figured out right now. Hopelessness can be a very tough mental block, but just know you are not alone. Some tips that might help you is writing down the causes of your problems, and writing it down can help you understand where you might need to change something or find a solution. Getting plenty of sunlight also helps because Vitamin D helps improve our mood as well as a healthy meal.Another thing is positive self talk. Positive self-affirmations are also extremely helpful and regular practice can help you cope better. Completing small, achievable tasks like folding some laundry or making a cup of tea is also essential in helping your brain feel accomplished. And most importantly, move in ways that you can express your feelings! Dancing,singing, painting  or drawing can help redirect your focus to the present and ground you with some fun! I hope this helped.😄

Kind Regards,

Jimmy

[moody-_ahhhhh]

for me i find that rotating across mental health services such as faculty wellbeing, counsellor, psych, peer workers online helps

i am someone who doesnt like being vulnerable to family and friends so i see where u are coming from

[therising]

Hi poisontree

I feel for you so much as you seriously begin to question the way forward through life. One of the toughest of times in life would have to be what I've come to call 'the in-between'. 

• We can be in-between who we were and who we're going to be in the future (where we can feel no solid sense of identity)
• We can be in-between an obvious sense of progress in the past and a future sense of progress (where we can feel no major sense of progress or graduation through life)
• We can be in-between a somewhat positive old set of emotions and an entirely new set of positive emotions (where there can be this feeling of numbness or a sense of no positive emotions)
• We can be in-between the kinds of visions we had in the past, where things may have appeared clearly to us (through our imagination), and the kinds of visions we're going to develop regarding the way ahead. When it comes to such visions, there can be a feeling or sense of having 'gone blind'

From my own experience, I've found the in-between can involve a massive list, so I won't go on. Btw, not a huge fan of the 'the in-between', 'the void' or whatever we choose to call it. Without a solid sense of identity, a solid sense of progress, a solid sense of positive emotions, a solid sense of vision and a solid sense of direction, there can definitely be an almost surreal sense of floating, going nowhere. I've found the truth to be...the in-between can be a major transitional place. It's a place of deep questioning, of transformation and reformation and many other things. It's the place where we start becoming who we're going to be. 

As a 55yo gal and with my husband's support, I'm taking a year off from going out to work. I'm just in-between so much at the moment. Having just finished my first 2 weeks of 'free time', this time is full of a lot of hard work. If you recall the concept of 'mind mapping' from school, I'm in the process of completing a mind map of my entire life at this point, amongst working on other things such as developing a sense of structure. When work and school are no longer a factor in our life, we can get lost without a solid sense of life structure. They're 2 of the things that provide a lot of structure. So, with a whole year in the in-between, my goal is to use it constructively. The main reason I'm not 'flying blind' without a vision is based on the mind map. I can see where I'm going or where I need to go.