Married Gay guy with 2 kids

[Karthik]

Hi All,

After 14 years of marriage, I came out to my Mrs nearly a year ago. Have 13 years and 6.5years kids. It’s been hard year to live together with clashes time to time, no connection whatsoever between us like use to be. She’s still angry with me being myself. She expect me to live together and stop whatever I do as I was in the past. It makes me so hard even after I’m saying that I need to move on and live my life. She and her family thinks I’m so selfish fella and don’t care about her and kids. I do love my kids dearly but at the same time, I didn’t want to live a lie anymore.

She kept saying I’m the whole world to her and she cannot do anything else without me. It makes it so hard to tear apart from her. I am in a situation like i came out from the closet but forced to go back to closet now. Not sure if this is any healthy for my mental health if this continues. Please advise on this what can I do? Thx

[Karthik]

Hi Donte,

Wow. What a story..Very inspiring and glad everything worked out well for you. Proud of your ex. wife for being a advocate of gay rights. Happy to hear that.

Some cultures, it can be a challenge to make Wife understand about the situation since it is a taboo for them and never came across. My situation is very similar being a Indian origin, its been incredibly hard to explain to family and convince them. I am working on this bit by bit and I am positive that i'll get there.

For now, we have kind of decided that we will continue to be married but I might have to stay apart from family home partially and meet them on weekends. My idea is to working interstate and visit them every couple of weeks and She's agreed to it. However, not sure if it works out for long term as i cannot be there for emergencies as I may live in different city. She just want me to be a part of her life forever and doesn't want to lose me. Same time she now understood that I should be full filled as well to be able to be happy naturally. Only time will tell how it goes. 🙂

I have booked the momentum group at VAC and next one sometime in May it seems. Cant wait to share the experiences in the group. Hoping to get something out of it as you mentioned.

Thanks for your advises. Really appreciate your help.

Regards, Karthik

[Karthik]

Hi Sez,

Thank you again. Yes agreed. This time hopefully the Counselling brings me some insights.

I think as you mentioned, I need to discuss about kids this time with Counsellor to find out some tips.

Yes Sez, the situation is like very uncertain and it continues. as mentioned above, we have just made some decision and she is kind of starting to understand me.

I'll update if something happens soon. Can't thank enough you all on your inputs on this.

Kind regards,

Karthik

[Just Sara]

You're welcome my friend;

apana khayaal rakhana aur kaamayaabee mile! 🙂

Sez - hug

[Karthik]

Hey Sez! Thank you for the kind words...Surprised to see that in Hindi 🙂

Take care too. xx