I'm unsure..

[waffle_puppy]

(Thank you so much again for reading my posts and I understand it's been a while since I've posted anything but again, thank you so much ☺️)

So recently I've been questioning my sexuality a lot, even when I told my parents about it (Especially my dad 😅) he tells me that I must settle in so that I won't be confused for any longer, however I'm torn between feeling as if I might be Pansexual or Bisexual because I've recently had crushes on both boys and girls, however I feel fond of those who may be non-binary or another gender as well. For example, my ex (Who I've dated in year 7 to get a taste of what dating could be like since I was curious) was non-binary. I enjoyed their company a lot, however they decided to break up with me later on which was fine. As I went into year 8 I felt as if I was a lesbian; however in year 9 (The year I'm in currently) I feel as if I like both men and women, non-binary people and people who identify with other genders, however somedays I feel like I like men and women the most. How do I figure this out? Is it even normal to feel like this? 

[white knight]

Hi, welcome, thanks for returning

The fact that you are "trying to figure it out" is problematic. See, if LGBTIQ is the spectrum of "other than straight, that in itself could be restrictive. If there was say, the letter "W" for exactly your sexuality then you wouldnt be writing in asking for advice. Understand?

Missy Higgins the singer put it perfectly "I see my sexuality as fluid, whatsever I feel towards someone at the time be it male or female. " So she is I suppose bisexual but every bisexual likely has feelings more for one gender than the other.

The real question is this - what does it matter that you need to be pigeon holed into one of the sex genders? You are unique, beautiful human being that seeks love and affection, that can take time to find but wherever you end up on the selection table as long as you find what you are looking for and that could take some experimenting. Missy herself had a long term lesbian relationship then married a man and had children and since split up. That is another example of being "fluid"

So your happiness as an individual is very important and your mental health is paramount. To maintain control over the latter is to be yourself and enjoy every breath of your life as ever breath is golden. A lover to share that gold with is a great aspiration whatever their gender.

TonyWK

[white knight]

Post anytime is you'd like to discuss this more

TonyWK

[waffle_puppy]

I see. I've stated that I'm told to "figure it out" because that's what my dad keeps telling me, compared to my mom who says that it's okay if I like both women and men and she stated that she'd be supportive no matter what. However I just couldn't decide, yet as I read your reply, I took some time to figure out more of myself, and have even looked at various resources across the internet and have even considered my attraction towards others and I actually feel as if I could possibly be Bisexual, however I understand that I shouldn't pigeon-hole myself into a sexuality or gender, but I feel as if Bisexual could suit me the best. I've considered (and thought over) the fact that I've had multiple crushes on both women and men through school, and up to year 9. And even know, I have harboured feelings towards both women and men. However yes, I am willing to discuss this more and might even make another post about it. Thank you so much for your response 😄

[white knight]

That's amazing progress. Your mum is a diamond of a lady and dont worry about your dad, he'll come around because he loves you. Be patient with him. For some parents its hard to adjust.

Glad you like beyondblue 

TonyWK 

[waffle_puppy]

Thank you so much, I will make sure to keep you updated on what my dad says. So far when I was in the car with him yesterday, I actually openly told him I'm Bisexual, so he took in a deep breath and actually ended up asking me "Well, who's going to be the lucky man or woman in a few years?" since we were passing by a store that sold wedding dresses. It might've taken him some time and discussion with my mom, but he's actually gotten better. Way better. I might even be getting a Bisexual flag for my room, so that's something I look forward to (Unless it gets torn by my cat who hangs on everything he sees.) and basically that's what happened. I'm feeling pretty positive about him 😄

[white knight]

Wow, thats amazing and such progress, I'm happy for you.

Now if anyone ever says to you "why are you bisexual" refrain from the actual truth as its a leading question eg they might as well say "why are you not normal". So if I were you try to joke with the topic eg "because think about it this way... I'll have twice the number of people that I can date".  🙂 . And "when I'm shopping I'll need a neck massage as I can flirt with so many people."  or- "when I look at a good set of legs it doesnt matter that they are hairy".  and "well, I can be the bride and the groom... choice choices..."That kind of barter you can develop to end up a fun person to be with.

Happy journey.

TonyWK