Hate ramping up - worsening my cptsd

[gruidae]

I'm really not coping with the escalation in queer and gender diverse people once again being the constant object of debate and discussion in order for a particular party to win an election. I suffered homophobic hate crime as a youngster - it's bringing it all up again. Every time there is a phase of our lives being up for heteroseuxal and cissexual people to debate on our legitimacy, violence surely follows. I'm having constant flashbacks to being beaten and raped in the school toilets when I was at highschool. I've seen it mainly coming down on gender diverse afab where it's taken root n the UK and it's making me too scared to leave the house. I know our voices aren't valued in the media, we're just a "big problem"to all cis/hetero people who need us to just disappear. They'll never stop. I'm 52 and it's never stopped. It will never get better, they'll never stop trying to vilify us ,bash us, rape us and destroy us. Any, the only way I'll ever be safe is not be part of the Australian community anymore. All I want is to find a way of forming a queer only community where we only have to have contact with each other and not this violent hateful society Our own businesses that exclude them , our own healthcare which excludes them - everything we need and a way to never have to encounter another people who actually belong out there in the hateful world. I'm so done. I'm sick of hiding in my house because everywhere - cishet people. Turn on the tv - there they are, with all their violence, hate and scare campaigns. How do I escape them? How do I escape this hateful world?

[Sophie_M]

Hi gruidae,

Thank you so much for sharing such brave and powerful words. We can hear that you are facing some really challenging thoughts and emotions surrounding your experiences as a member of the queer community. We are so sorry to hear about the traumatic experiences you have had, thank you for the courage to share these with the community. You never know who may read your post and feel less alone in their own experience.

This is a welcoming and supportive space, and this kind community has a lot of experience and understanding. Maybe this could be a part of the safe space you describe.

We can hear you’re struggling to cope with the escalation of this debate and struggling to find hope that things will get better. If you feel like talking through how your feeling, you could give the lovely Beyond Blue support service a call on 1300 22 4636, or via online chat. As you may already know, QLife will be really good to speak to about this. You can reach them on 1800 184 527 or via webchat, from 3pm-midnight each day (AEDT).

Thanks again for sharing this here, gruidae. It’s not always easy to share here, but this is a powerful conversation and we thank you for starting it. Our community and our Support Service are here with you.

Kind regards,

Sophie M

[That Other Guy]

I'm 53, and honestly, in my experience, EVERYONE I meet is in your corner. These hate campaigns are disgusting but they are trying to appeal to a minority. My son is trans, there are tons of queer online communities where you can find support,and even IRL ones in most capital cities.

We had a marriage equality debate. Because everyone accepts gays, the right tried to attack trans kids and we STILL WON. Most people are with you, the minority are just loud in voicing their hate. I am so sorry you need to deal with this but please NEVER think you are alone

[gruidae]

Thankyou. I've been trying to get through to QLife for days - you can't for love or money. No offence to cishet folks but I'm really not up to talking to mainstream counselling services about my fear of past violence returning as I'm not sure they like to recognise the level of unpunished criminality their peers got away with in the past and will no doubt will continue to get away with during what's coming.

No matter who wins the election the media already smell blood in the water so I fear it's just going to be like this for a decade or two until the general public tire of it, like they eventually did with refugees. But likely to go on for the rest of my life until that happens.

My irl support organisation closed for face to face support at the point we opened up to "living with covid". They were due to consider re-opening in March, then they got flooded and will now be closed "for the forseeable future". So that's just great. So all this is coming at a time when our main support organisation has all but disappeared.

There was also a social support organisation called Wendybird but they closed last year, due to having their funding cut.

I guess it's just about withdrawing from society at this point until things get less hostile

[Rocky_P_]

Hi Gruidae,

Firstly, I just wanted to say that I am so sorry to hear what you went through when you were younger. It was obviously a very difficult time for you and I can appreciate the long lasting effect this had on you. I completely understand the desire to speak to a LGBTIQA+ service. Have you tried searching for LGBTIQA+ psychologists in your area? I know there are some openly identifying psychologists in my area and thought it might be a useful point for you to start.

Your feelings are very valid. I have been feeling attacked recently as well. It's disappointing when our lives and our experiences become fodder for debate and to win votes. It makes it extremely difficult to feel anything other than minimised and belittled. I also agree that discussions like this increase hate and violence on our community, so I certainly hear your concern. For me personally, the thing I cling to is the support of my family and friends who know me and love me. I hope you have someone in your life that you can lean on for support. If not, please keep in touch on here. let us know how you are going and hopefully through this process you will see you are not alone.

Take care and reach out if you need

RP