Sexuality and gender identity

Peer support and conversations about anxiety, depression and other issues in the mental health space affecting LGBTQI+ people.

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MsPurple LGBT+ members - got a question - need somewhere to start - here is the place
  • replies: 219

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations H... View more

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations Here you can ask questions about anything from questioning your sexuality/gender identity, coming out concerns, dating, mental health etc. If you are an ally (an Ally is a person who considers themselves a friend to the LGBTQ+ community) you are also welcome to come here to be a support to our community and ask questions as well. This is a supportive place for people to discuss their questions and concerns, we are not a place of judgement. As Thumper from the movie Bambi said "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all." If you are looking for a more social and light hearted conversation might I suggest joining us on the thread under BB social/rainbow cafe. Copy and paste the link: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/bb-social-zone/let's-chat-about-anything Feel free to introduce yourself below and ask any question/s I thought I'd answer one common question in the intro post and this is one I have heard a lot. What do the letters mean? When referring to the community it is shortened to LGBT+ as there are more letters than just the 4. I have put some of the common ones here: Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Transsexual Two-spirited Queer Questioning Intersex Asexual Ally Pansexual Agender Gender Queer Welcome everyone and hope to see you around on this thread and around the BB forums MP

Chris_B IMPORTANT: Information and guidelines for posting in this section
  • replies: 0

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe spa... View more

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe space to talk about how issues relating to gender identity and sexual orientation impact on mental health and wellbeing. 2. This includes discussion of and support around chronic illnesses such as HIV which disproportionately affect gay, bisexual and other men who have sex with men. 3. As this is a safe and affirming space for LGBTIQ individuals, please note this is not an appropriate space for debating the "rights and wrongs" of homosexuality, bisexuality, or gender fluidity itself. This includes use of terms such as "lifestyle" and "choice". 4. This sub-forum is and always will be a safe and supportive place for LGBTIQ people concerned with what we all need to do to stay well. That said, others are welcome provided they respect that this is primarily a LGBTIQ space. 5. If you do not identify as LGBTIQ, or are not currently supporting someone in your life who is LGBTIQ, and are curious about aspects of sexuality or gender identity, please read through beyondblue’s resources for and about LGBTIQ people here to educate yourself rather than posting in this section.

All discussions

PsychedelicFur My estrange mum’s partner
  • replies: 6

Hello there, ok so just over a year and four months ago my mum decided to walk out on my father. They had been married for a bit over twenty three years and she started to emotionally cheat on my dad with another man. Now her and that other man are n... View more

Hello there, ok so just over a year and four months ago my mum decided to walk out on my father. They had been married for a bit over twenty three years and she started to emotionally cheat on my dad with another man. Now her and that other man are no longer together for many personal reasons. However she is now engaged to someone who somewhat confuses me and I need some insight on this issue and situation. He is a man, biologically. However, when he feels like it he will wear women’s clothing. He admitted that he is never going to pursue any hormone tablets or undergo any surgical procedures to help him change his gender. However, he identifies as a female and shares photos of women kissing women all over his profile on a certain social media platform. Bare in mind he doesn’t always wear females clothing by the looks of it and yet he still identifies as a female yet he isn’t going to do anything about his genitalia. I’m very confused? This individual does not have any breasts etc. Could someone please provide some insight to this issue for me as I am really truly confused and don’t know if my mother is going through a midlife crisis or something. My mother, who now heavily smokes and drinks calls herself a lesbian. Yet she sleeps with this individual who is biologically a man. And they only dress in women’S clothes when he or she feels like it. Yet my mother told me years ago that if I were to turn out gay or bisexual that she should be very disappointed in me. I’m very confused. She has no contact with me and posts older photos of me on her Facebook, from when I was a little bit younger that sleazy old men comment ‘sexy’ and ‘hot’ underneath and she says ‘thank you’ as if to say that’s ok to objectify and speak about my only child in a disgusting and vile way. When she left, way back with her first partner, whom tried to hit on me by rubbing my legs, she told me to ‘get f*cked’ and stuck her finger up at me as the car drove off. I don’t feel safe around her and any men or individuals she is dating or associating with because she always speaks to individuals that sexualise her and sometimes me. looking for answers, PSYCHEDELICFUR.

randomspace Confused and Sad
  • replies: 4

I haven't posted in a while, I have depression anxiety. But that's not the point, I used to think I knew my gender but I don't anymore. I really hate having breasts, I find myself disgusting to look at although logically I don't think that's the case... View more

I haven't posted in a while, I have depression anxiety. But that's not the point, I used to think I knew my gender but I don't anymore. I really hate having breasts, I find myself disgusting to look at although logically I don't think that's the case from others perspectives. My breasts are small but I still hate them. I tried talking to my parents they sympathized but didn't think it was a major issue. My gender seems to change sometimes but not really. I feel sometimes part male and female, sometimes have no gender, sometimes have part a gender. I was told this is gender fluid but I still feel the same, its more of a perspective of myself. I feel uncomfortable going into the female toilets and change rooms at school, but I don't want to go into the male. Its worsening my mood and I'm told I often come across and cold and unfeeling even to my family and friends lately. I suppose that's my emotional state. I don't know what to do about this. Thanks for reading all this

CalmCat LGBTQIA+ Support Around Australia
  • replies: 3

Hi Guys, I'm Victorian and found https://www.minus18.org.au/ so helpful when coming out. Just thought others could share LGBTQIA+ links that might be helpful also. Looking forward to seeing that links or website others share. Regards, D

Hi Guys, I'm Victorian and found https://www.minus18.org.au/ so helpful when coming out. Just thought others could share LGBTQIA+ links that might be helpful also. Looking forward to seeing that links or website others share. Regards, D

Soggy_Oatmeal I'm questioning my sexuality!!!
  • replies: 2

Hi, I'm feeling really anxious about posting here but I've been thinking of my sexuality for at least two years now. I'm in a friend group of people who understand themselves and I feel like I'm behind. I'm still young but I like knowing what is ahea... View more

Hi, I'm feeling really anxious about posting here but I've been thinking of my sexuality for at least two years now. I'm in a friend group of people who understand themselves and I feel like I'm behind. I'm still young but I like knowing what is ahead of me I worry too much and constantly wonder whether I like girls? boys? or no one at all! I'm so confused since I feel I don't understand what attraction feels like. Do I just think they're pretty or do I actually feel attraction towards them? I'm honestly here looking for support and similar experiences as I have come out as queer to few people and usually cope with feelings of confusion through humour yet I feel I'm leaning towards bisexuality: they/them and she/her or aromantic/asexuality which are both very different yet I feel I relate to those two the most. This might not even be understandable but I feel it was worth a try!

CJ_bi Hi there, wanna chat?
  • replies: 6

Hello whoever may be reading this, I thought I would start this thread because I wanted to talk to someone in general. I have also been having troubles figuring out whether I am bisexual or gay. I have faked crushes on boys to make me look more strai... View more

Hello whoever may be reading this, I thought I would start this thread because I wanted to talk to someone in general. I have also been having troubles figuring out whether I am bisexual or gay. I have faked crushes on boys to make me look more straight and I have had real crushes on girls, but I have actually had 1 proper crush on a boy. Any thoughts? I would appreciate anyone to talk to...

Lyndis So...I came out
  • replies: 4

I recently came out to my father as bisexual, and his reaction...was alright, I suppose. He seemed to not really care, so now I'm kinda worried as to what he thinks of me. Any ideas of what to do?

I recently came out to my father as bisexual, and his reaction...was alright, I suppose. He seemed to not really care, so now I'm kinda worried as to what he thinks of me. Any ideas of what to do?

Oliver_c how do i come out?
  • replies: 4

hi. my name is Oliver... wow that feels weird? but good to say, i am a trans boy my pronouns are he/they and im 13. i dont know how to come out. its scary. i want to bind. i want to start T or even just hormone blockers. but i am not out ot my family... View more

hi. my name is Oliver... wow that feels weird? but good to say, i am a trans boy my pronouns are he/they and im 13. i dont know how to come out. its scary. i want to bind. i want to start T or even just hormone blockers. but i am not out ot my family yet and i honestly dont think i can come out to them. i came out to my mum as pan about 9 months ago and she fully accepted me. my brother and dad now know but they dont really care. but i know my family i know my mum she wont understand the whole trans thing and i cant even imagine talking to my brother or dad once i come out, my relationship would be so unatural with my dad after and my brother is transphobic. i hate being trans, why arent i cis? i was meant to be a boy anyway. i was the first 'girl' born in my family for 90 years!! why me why was i the one to come out the wrong gender

Mudcakes Want to but scared to share my bisexuality on social media.
  • replies: 21

So basically my Mum knows I’m Bi. My “best friend” does. (Kinda complicated) And two fellow lgbt friends that I’m yet to speak in person (One at school, one not) some people in a private group chat. Somedays I want to post stuff you know? Quotes or s... View more

So basically my Mum knows I’m Bi. My “best friend” does. (Kinda complicated) And two fellow lgbt friends that I’m yet to speak in person (One at school, one not) some people in a private group chat. Somedays I want to post stuff you know? Quotes or something. I have pins my Mum got me but I’m scared to wear them. I guess some days I just want to share on facebook or instagram a picture but then I feel scared. I also feel like it’s a private thing no one really needs to know except close friends, close family and obviously future partners, but at the same time every now and then I just want to. Any advice on if I should or if I should wait until I’m really ready and not feeling scared. In my other threads I have spoken about my current school experience. So this might make that worse too. I don’t know I just some days what to just post and smile.