Anxiety to do with potentially being ace or a lesbian?

[DahliaDaydreams]

I don’t really know where to start… I’m not sure if this is the right forum.
I’ve been questioning my sexuality for quite some time and I’m only mentioning this because I think it may play a role in how I’m feeling right now? A few days ago I went out and kissed someone for the first time, a guy. I immediately felt sick to my stomach and it just felt so wrong, and I felt like I needed to leave immediately. I was freaking out and I thought if I just left the anxiety and panic I felt would go away. Except it hasn’t. Any time I think about it my stomach lurches and I feel like throwing up.
I can’t get the thought out of my head of how much I hated it and just did it because I’d heard so many stories that I felt like it was expected. And not only that but the feeling hit me really hard that I’m probably not interested in men at all which has led to another layer of anxiety.
This was three days ago now and I’m flinching and get unreasonably scared anytime something reminds me of it and it’s really affecting me negatively.

I guess why I’m putting this on here is to ask if this is an ordinary experience, if anyone has any advice as to how to stop the anxiety, and if this could be anything to do with asexuality or something?

[Sophie_M]

Dear DahliaDaydreams

We really appreciate you finding the strength to post your confusion in our forums. Yes, this post is in the correct forum, and this is a helpful and supportive community.

We understand that You have been struggling with understanding your sexuality, and who you might be attracted to. Your confusion really increased because you kissed a boy, and have been experiencing significant anxiety since.

It is possible that you may be attracted to people of the same gender, the opposite gender, both genders, or neither gender. This is a question which will resolve for you over time, and nobody else is truly able to tell you who you are and are not attracted to.

To us, it seems like the actual question you are asking is, why did you have such a negative reaction to kissing that particular person? From what you say in your post, it sounds to us that you are not attracted to the person you kissed. We would not read anything further into your reaction. We would like to encourage you to have patience with yourself, and allow yourself to pay attention to what you are feeling inside, and let your heart be your guide.

Please remember, we are always here to support you through your journey of self-discovery.

Warm regards,

Sophie M.
 

[Petal22]

Hi DahliaDaydreams,

Well come to our forums .

Sophie M has given you some great advice.

I understand that anxiety can be hard to deal with.

If you are feeling distressed please make an appointment with your gp and do a mental health plan together this will enable you to see a psychologist.

Please try not to overthink things.

Deep slow breathing is great for anxiety.

When you have the thoughts just allow them to be there and float away.

Try not to give your thoughts your attention because what we give attention to we give power to.